The Renku Sessions: Title To Be Determined
Hello Everyone—I was so happy to see so many friends, old and new, ready to participate in creating this twenty-verse poem. Thank you so much for welcoming me so kindly; it’s most gracious of you. Of the 150 verses submitted for the hokku, I have chosen sixteen verses for final consideration and those highlighted in bold were my short list.
a prodigal son
searching for home
in the moonlight
Dan Campbell
bringing to light
our unique quirks
hazy May moon
Clysta Seney
the original influencer
with a flair for gray –
this hazy moon!
princess k
spring moon
a raft of sea otters
afloat on its back
and so
we begin again
spring moon
Keith Evetts
looking up
only the moonlight
to guide my way
Pauline O’Carolan
desert dusk moon
heaven sent front row tickets
to aurora display
bright moon
forgotten nectar feeders
light up like lanterns
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
hazy moon
a gentle breeze
lifts the curtain
Betty Shropshire
crescent moon
humming a lullaby
from his grandfather’s primer
hazy moon
the seer pauses
over a card
moonbeams…
the busy spinnerets
of an orb weaver
Laurie Greer
Pentecost
the same moon
world over
Richard Straw
moonlight
on the footpath
–silver ferns
Nancy Brady
misty moon
toasted with green tea served
in plastic cups
Attard Francis
The opening verse for the renku is:
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
which means, with a nod to the southern hemisphere, we will be writing an autumn nijuin renku.
All of the above verses caught my eye or heart. They had a feeling of joy or calm or appreciation that I think a hokku should have. Wendy’s verse, in particular, stood out to me as an impactful visual image. And beyond it being visually strong, it had just a touch of sauciness while alluding to the team that we are assembling here to work together and the harmony we need for a successful outcome. I hope it can be our beacon for the journey ahead.
Your assignment for next week is to write:
- a two-line autumn verse; the two lines should flow syntactically;
- link to the hokku in some fashion;
- if the opening hokku is like the joyful greeting of the arriving guests, this verse should have the feeling of a gracious host pleased that we have come ;
- avoid any proper nouns, any mention of religion, war, politics, death, or any wild or bizarre subjects (this section of the renku is like the opening of a party—mostly small talk for now);
- for the rest of the renku, please avoid any subjects related to festivals or circuses, carnival acts, etc.;
- submit your verses by midnight PDT Tuesday, May 28.
I also invite you to weigh in on selecting a title for our renku. Let’s choose from a title from the hokku. It will be our working title. We may change it in the end but for now a working title would be handy to have. Give me you thoughts on The Juggler, Side Show, or Harvest Festival. Or ?
One more thing—sometimes to make all the verse work in harmony I might suggest a change to one of your verses. If you really don’t want your verses monkied with, please let me know. You can email me privately if you wish at [email protected].
Since we only have twenty verses, it will be my practice to choose only one verse from a particular writer. So, Wendy, congratulations on having your verse chosen for the hokku. This means I will not choose another verse of yours although you are welcome to continue to contribute verses and be part of the ongoing dialogue.
I am looking forward to seeing your offerings for verse 2.
Patricia
The Haiku Foundation reminds you that participation in our offerings assumes respectful and appropriate behavior from all parties. Please see our Code of Conduct policy: https://thehaikufoundation.org/about-thf/policies/#code-of-conduct
Comments (226)
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the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
very happy
one of the circus performers was a childhood friend
Nani Mariani
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
happiest moment
all show up
Nani Mariani
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Great verse, Wendy!
one by one
adding logs to the fire
a silhouetted scarecrow
does a jig at midnight
passing around glasses
of local cider
the amber glow
of homemade cider
on the count of three
everyone toasts our host
at the stroke of midnight
a pumpkin smiles back
hi marion! glad to see you back again, thanks for kind words for our hokku and the wonderfully joyful verses.
this long cold night
we group around the fire
oops…my verse should be:
one long, low whistle
passing through the town
Dear Patricia,
What a fun party you and everyone are creating.
And what a great hokku; congrats, Wendy.
Here is my offering:
one long and low whistle
passing through the town
Looking forward to 20 weeks of sharing and learning.
Mimi
thanks Mimi for all your words of appreciation, thanks for coming aboard this fun journey with us all.
floating tealights
mirror the path of orange leaves
– or –
floating tealights
continue the path of orange leaves
– or –
fallen leaves
create embers on the pond
– or –
the forest floor becomes a giant mural
under a canopy of changing leaves
– or –
the forest floor…
a giant mural of changing leaves
Diana Ming Jeong
wow! Diana
the forest floor…
a giant mural of changing leaves
Diana Ming Jeong
Thank you Wendy!
Another edit:
the forest floor…
a giant mural of changing colors
Diana Ming Jeong
the forest floor…
a kaleidoscope of colors
Diana Ming Jeong
Solitaired!
Indispensable,
Upset self!!!
hi rajesh….thanks for joining the group!
What a beautiful and playful opening verse/ hokku! This is fun :) Thanks for the invitation, Patricia, I always love your commentary xxoo
My wakiku offerings:
drowsing next to the wood stove
I listen for your step
****
quart jars of canned fruit
we arrange by color
***
my bare skin…
this new coolness
hi Stephanie,
thanks for adding to the fun and your generous words about the opening verse.
a crowd gathers around
the giant pumpkin
For the title, some suggestions:
Juggling Joy
Joyous Moon
Harvest Joy
Harvest Moon
OK, here are a few from me…
discussing the weather
over sloe gin cocktails
rippling stars
in our ginger apple cocktails
apple bobbing
damp hair and smiles
smiles and small talk
sipping sloe gin cocktails
Clearly I have booze on the brain! ?
the buffalo boy flutes his tune
after a long day of singing
hi surya,
happy to hear your poetry and have your involvement in this renku group.
Congratulations Wendy!
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
——— Wendy C. Bialek
.
shadows of migrating birds
dust the moon
.
red leaves and blue sky
dance in the wind
.
kittens sip from a saucer
of moonlight
.
a swirl of moths
orbits the yellow lamplight
hi Jonathan
thank you and glad to see you back posting!
such lovely autumn verses!
this is my fav of yours:
a swirl of moths
orbits the yellow lamplight
——-Jonathan Alderfer
*
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
*
Wendy C. Bialek
*
twenty-odd ducks flying south
home in on their pond
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
*
Wendy C. Bialek
*
more shaggy dogs and stories
as the long nights get colder
*
.
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
.
Wendy C. Bialek
.
.
cricket and i
sing for our supper
.
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
— Wendy C. Bialek
snapshot first shrike’
& a matched hunch
late with the grain bucket
whinnies from the warm barn
the hot roasted corn on the cob
she slips into my cold hands
the mug of hot apple cider
she slips into my cold hands
a snake parting bright leaves
finds its family in their crevice
as we sing around the campfire
sparks mingle with stars
Wow! Rob….
a cornucopia of sound, visions, flavours and warmth mixed with magic and nature.
plenty of parking reserved
for the broomsticks
plenty of parking reserved
for the broomsticks
:-) :-) :-)
This one has me laughing, truly! Love it! :-) Perhaps not for the wakiku, though. But definitely, as a verse, a keeper.
love it…Laurie
morning mist
she balances to tie her school shoes
-or-
morning mist
she balances to tie her shoes
Diana Ming Jeong
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
— Wendy C. Bialek
cornstalks in wind
or wind in cornstalks?
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
*
Wendy C. Bialek
*
pointed this way and that
through the rustling corn maze
*
stalking each other
to the heart of the corn maze
*
Thank you, Patricia, for the elaborate guidance. Congratulations, Wendy, on a beautiful and vivid verse for the hokku!
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
— Wendy C. Bialek
For the title, I was wondering about Festival Sideshow or Festival Show.
My offers for the wakiku:
guardians of haystack
all around the bullock
rice sparrows on the porch
twittering their song
dragonflies resting
on reeds between the rocks
an old couple’s sweet-nothings fill
the tree with persimmons
the missing apples mixed
into an already full fruit bowl
Thanks Amoolya for your kinds words of support
found in your wonderful wakiku offerings and
hokku compliments!
every sider
high fives the scarecrow
Hi, Carol–help me out here. I don’t know what a “sider” is :(
Patricia, consider sports games such as football where two sides compete for the win. People take sides, barrack for the team they hope will win. So we get the ‘magpie siders’ and the ‘hawks siders’.
Then, there are ‘insiders’ and ‘outsiders’.
So I take Carol’s L1 as meaning people from all sides applaud the scarecrow. (But am not sure. They say things differently in Wales. :-) )
(‘siders’ might also mean a side dish (not the main dish) in a cafe, but that doesn’t apply here.)
Hi Patricia
Lorin is on the right road. Yes, we say things a bit different here in Wales, bang on there, Lorin :):)
When I used the word ‘sider, I was thinking more about people of the north and south east and west eg north-siders south-siders, all gathering together for Wendy’s delightful festival verse.
Sider – someone placed or living in a specified side or section of their country, urban or rural.
Hope this helps, Patricia.
Thanks for asking. Have a good day.
i like the meaningful messages and good feelings of unity and appreciation this seemingly innocent verse speaks. it gets my vote for verse two!
thank you Carol for giving worthy support to hokku.
i see a wonderful link with the juggler’s rising hands and the rising high-fiving hands…resonating with the movement of a moon.
clearly i hear
a microphone drop!
Thankyou, Wendy, for your thoughts on this offering. Yours is a great opening verse, and there’s a plethora of wonderful verses for Patricia to ponder over. We live in hope, but most importantly, enjoy the party.
thank you, again for your kind words. and yes, Carol…..thank you for the reminder….about enjoying the party!
that Patricia has many gifts to enjoy and consider from the many gifted poets here…is an understatement.
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
— Wendy C. Bialek
all are welcome
in the pumpkin patch
chewing on hay
in the pumpkin patch
meeting up
in the pumpkin patch
framing pictures
In the pumpkin patch
casting soft shadows
in the pumpkin patch
casting ghostly shadow
in the pumpkin patch
Congratulations, Wendy on this lovely hokku. You’ve captured the essence of the sublime and the playful.
Suggesting the title: “Cornucopia Days”
~
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
~
she catches the finale
of falling apples
~
dappled night shadows
as if cast by the sun
~
sleeping toddlers
in the arms of drowsy dads
~
one more hayride
under the ebbing light
~
just right aged dew
to harden the cider
~
sitting on a pumpkin
eatin’ punkin pie
~
laughter peels from
the apple bobbing barrels
thanks so much, Jackie, i’m glad to have provided you a place for that amazing poetic array of verses for the wakiku ! So many eye candies for Patricia!
here’s one for you:
scarecrow’s pocket fill with popcorn
from daddy’s shoulders
correction:
scarecrow’s pockets fill with popcorn
from daddy’s shoulder
Jackie my favs:
laughter peels from
the apple bobbing barrels
J M Robinson
sleeping toddlers
in the arms of drowsy dads
J M Robinson
pumpkin seeds glazed
on the tear and share wheatsheaf
a raccoon in the trip-cam
shaking his fist
*
a raccoon in the trip-cam
caught red handed
*
the trip-cam catches
a raccoon red handed
*
outstretched hands
offer a bowl of new rice
…
yellow and white chrysanthemums
on the dining table
…
silver sardines
caught by a purse seine
yellow and white chrysanthemums
on the dining table
Perhaps keep it for the ‘flower verse’ position, Pauline?
Hi Lorin Unfortunately that can’t be done as these are autumn flowers and the flower verse will be spring blossom! Best, Pauline
scarecrow points this hay
kettle corn this hay port-a-potties
should this be deemed too close to the hokku for Patricia, or too bawdy for the second renku verse…
(Nancy has Otto)
i work with editcrow and we have chiseled it down to:
scarecrow pointing
this hay and that hay
What? !!! Wendy & Nancy, are you (both or either of you) using AI editors or the like?
If so, is this approved of by either Patricia, Jim Kacian or any of the various people and committees of The Haiku Foundation ?
(I suppose the issue had to come and I’m probably naive to think it hadn’t come already.)
Lorin,
LOL!
Nancy playfully has named her spellchecker, ‘Otto’
and and i made up a fictitious character, i call ‘editcrow’
after Dan wrote about ‘welcomecrow’.
i hope i have eased your AI concerns here and you can rest
calmly.
Thanks, Wendy, for having my back. .I am not a robot, nor some sort of AI., Lorin.
In the last renku session, I had my problems with autocorrect, which I have now named Otto Correct, Otto for short, but I digress. Some were funny, but most were embarrassing, yet I owned them by making fun of them and myself. Now I just blame Otto and fix them as in the “fry” being changed to “try” as I did earlier.
Lorin,
Never would I ever consider using an AI editor. I recently attended a zoom meeting in which a poet was discussing the use of AI when writing a haiku by putting in a few words (season, noun, another noun). From the generated haiku, the poet wrote a similar one, but a much better haiku. Frankly, I was appalled by the idea, and still am.
senile squirrel
trying to remember where he buried the nuts
falling leaves
such a melancholy melody
falling leaves
such a melancholy melody
That’d be ‘Autumn Leaves’ (the song, from way back, sung by Nat King Cole) wouldn’t it, Dan? I recall it from my childhood.
the noises off
of a clatter of windfalls
*
a path of dropped
dapples leads from the woods
*
a windfall of dropped dapples
leads us from the woods
exquisite laurie
a path of dropped
dapples leads from the woods
Laurie Greer
cider flows freely
in the hospitality tent
Works well for me, Carol. :-)
My kind o’ party, Lorin :)
Carol….so smooth!
Thanks, Wendy.
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
— Wendy C. Bialek
the gentle bow
sunflowers in dappled sun
Or
the gentle bow
of sunflowers in fall
Or
gently bowing
sunflowers in fall
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
stepping into the silence
of a windless dawn
crows walking in wilted cornfields
like wind-up toys
scarecrows look happier
when they’re wearing a cape
scarecrows like snowmen
never had a boyhood
sneaky scarecrow sipping
milk from the cat’s saucer
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival — Wendy C. Bialek
—
as a backdrop curtain
the southern lights
–
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFTbtRdBTyY
Lorin,
beautiful placement for your southern lights….imo this is a keeper!
Thanks, Wendy. Probably “curtain” is overdoing it, though?
as a backdrop
the southern lights
Lovely verse, Lorin.
or simply (so probably better)? :
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival — Wendy C. Bialek
—
the southern lights
as a backdrop
or
aurora australis
as a backdrop
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
apple cider and donut holes
on the refreshment table
apple cider and donut holes
served as refreshments
Hmmm, Nancy, donuts have holes, but as soon as one eats the donut there is no longer a hole. You can serve donuts but how could you possibly serve “donut holes”?
(I’m very curious!)
They actually make donut holes, which are just a bite, Lorin. I am sure I am not the only one who has bought (and eaten) donut holes. Maybe it’s a thing in America only.
I think donut shops make the regular donuts, which leaves a hole. They then try up the extra dough created by that hole,and thus the donut hole. No waste of the dough and people buy just the holes which are bite sized.
Fry not try..Otto Correct got me again. Darn!
OK, I think I understand: donuts have a hole in the centre, when fried & served. Before they’re cooked, though, they’re a round blob of dough without a hole. The cook then takes the necessary utensil, makes a hole in the centre of the donut’s dough and puts the donut into the fryer.
This leaves a little round bit of dough.
Two things can be done with these little dough balls: 1.) Roll them all together and make more donuts or leave them as small balls, throw them into the fryer and when cooked, call them “donut holes”.
That’s my best guess: the dough that’s taken out of the middle leaves a hole (and of course we can’t eat a hole) but these little balls of dough, when fried, come to be called ‘donut holes’. The thing (little dough ball extracted from the centre) takes the name of what it leaves behind: the hole.
Thanks, Nancy. :-)
…and for you, Nancy, with thanks :
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival – Wendy C. Bialek
.
a little boy watches
through his donut’s hole
Yep, you got It, Lorin.
Nan,
very welcoming
lol! very gobbled gone!
apple cider and donut holes
on the refreshment table
Nancy Brady
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival – Wendy C. Bialek
.
a whiff of corn whiskey
warms the busker up
.
or maybe:
a whiff of corn whiskey
warms us up
.
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival – Wendy C. Bialek
. . . and/or
(3)
behind stacked hay bales
a whiff of corn whiskey
–
… or, more straightforward, more to the point, brings “us” in to link to the hokku and acknowledge the host ( in this case, that would be the festival organizers? ):
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival – Wendy C. Bialek
a shot of corn whiskey
warms us up
—
“Give me you thoughts on The Juggler, Side Show, or Harvest Festival. Or ?” – Patricia
Of these three suggestions above, my preference is for ‘Harvest Festival’ And certainly not for ‘Juggler’s Moon’ or ‘the Juggler’s balls’ . :-) (see conversations on the thread).
I’m not too sure on this, Lorin — can renku titles be chosen from another verse within the session, later on or even at the end?
Carol, as far as I’ve experienced and/ or read, a renku’s title comes from some words in the hokku or the wakiku. Which words are chosen by the sabaki. Basho did it, John Carley did it , John Stevenson does it and every sabaki of every renku kept in THF Renku archives has done it, including Patricia.
https://thehaikufoundation.org/the-haiku-foundation-renku-archive/
So it’s certainly the tradition that the sabaki chooses the renku’s title from the hokku or wakiku.
. . . and ps: why I’m not keen on ‘Juggler’s Moon’ or ‘the Juggler’s balls’ is that they both can be read as bawdy, and bawdy, I believe, is best saved for the ‘love’ verses, :-)
Thankyou, for your reply to my question, always good to know.
And, I agree with the titles you have mentioned, more so the second one. I would lower the tone to a vibrant and energetic start to the session.
Perhaps I missed it Lorin, but I’ve yet to see a title suggestion for “The Juggler’s Balls” from anyone but yourself.
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
— Wendy C. Bialek
autumn glories
falling through the paper bag
Or
a riot of autumn glories
breaking loose
Or
gathering the fallen
autumn glories
more leaves jump
than fall
remember running
thru piles of leaves
moon napping
on barren limbs
Congratulations Wendy!!!
This is a lovely hokku that Patricia chose from many wonderful hokku submitted!
A suggestion for the title from the hokku…
Juggler’s Moon
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
morning mist
balancing to tie my new shoes
Diana Ming Jeong
– or-
morning mist
balancing to tie my new shoes for school
– or –
morning mist
balancing to tie my new school shoes
Thank you,
Diana
– or –
morning mist
she balances to tie her new school shoes
Thank you,
Diana
thank you, Diana
so i see…you like Juggler’s Moon, too
I have much to say about this one as a title.
but for now…
i will compliment your morning mist.
Thank you, Wendy! :)
when i first read the suggestion of Juggler’s Moon i thought that’s a very nice title, it’s smooth, concise, intriguing, and has a nice ring to it.
then…. the reread came…..and with it carried questions and concerns for me. the way we apply a title to any work of art…would be based on one’s interpretation of that art. If the reader believes this hokku is about a juggler….then this title for renku could apply.
however, respectfully i won’t support it and this is why:
i feel the focus is more about the serendipity about a moon and how our expectations on placement and spacial positioning can be juggled to provide enhanced enlightenment! A freed moon. There for everyone. Not ever ‘possessed’ by the juggler. in fact…the juggler may not even be aware that a moon is in his/hers shuffle act.
my second concern is based on the notion that a title of any work of art
be treated as and “eyebrow for the eye”…it gently stirs you in but never reveals the surprise of the eye qualities, ie: colours, age and abilities.
the use of a title like this, for the renku, imho, diminishes the reader’s experience of finding the serendipity of the hokku as it reveals within its very words…the plot as well as its ending….a certain spoiler alert flag
label should accompany it.
there is no revealing of plots/players in these other suggestions of Side Show or Harvest Sideshow they are eyebrows for the eye, enhancing and not limiting the possible interps. of hokku. and they are safe examples that would get my support.
Um. . . Wendy & Diana : I’d be leaving the choice of a title to the sabaki. In this case, to Patricia.
–
Considering that, in a juggler’s act, it’s usually balls that are being juggled (and in this case the moon is ball-shaped, too) perhaps both “juggler’s moon” and “juggler’s balls” would be more suitable for verses in the more bawdy “love” verses section than for the renku’s title?
Such an interesting, insightful analysis of the title choices. You make a lot of sense to me, Wendy. I like ‘Side Show’.
Really a fine example of critical thinking,Wendy. Makes me think I’ve been laboring under a misapprehension about titling renku. Been cowriting renku for some time now and have never come across the concept of “eyebrow for the eye”. It intrigues and delights me! That said, without making it a hard and fast rule, my partners and I have always chosen to leave the title to last because we can never foresee all the upcoming moments as the poem links its way to a close. One more thing, Is there a convention that the title shouldn’t contain direct quotes from the hokku as a title. Not sure where I got that idea, so it’s probably not a real ‘thing’. Your observation of the serendipitous nature of the poems is especially appealing and feels so right vis the title.
corrections and add ons:
be treated as an “eyebrow for the eye”…it gently stirs you in but never reveals the surprise of the eye qualities, ag: colours, age and abilities.
What if Edgar Allan Poe’s short story, ‘The Tell-Tale Heart’ was named,
“Under the Floor Boards”?
How fun would that be?
Rob’s humorous response is paraphrased:
a dead giveaway, wendy point taken!
this one, Diana…..pref. w/o the ‘new’
a good hokku reply
i like that it is scent based and has the implied elements of synesthesia!
morning mist
balancing to tie my new school shoes
Diana Ming Jeong
it has two autumn kigo
but the synesthesia becomes more diluted with the shoe elements.
Wendy,
Thank you! ?
morning mist
balancing to tie my school shoes
Diana Ming Jeong
For the title … how about “The Hanging Moon”
?
morning mist
balancing to tie my shoes
Diana Ming Jeong
Wendy,
When you said this one, which one? ☝️
and the one at 10:11 pm
Wendy C. Bialek
May 26, 2024 at 11:34 am
and the one at 10:11 pm
Thank you, Wendy. Thank you – Diana
Congrats Wendy and gracias Patricia!
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
— Wendy C. Bialek
applauding that scarecrow
in the moonlight, dancing in the wind
only scarecrows see
each and every sunrise and sunset
welcomecrow would be a
better name for the scarecrow
solitude is a scarecrow’s
only season
solitude a scarecrow’s
only season
thanks, Dan!
i agree with your welcomecrow!
just for fun: may i introduce you to….
editcrow a little snippy
with his scissorhands
Wendy,
Love the editcrow especially with the snippy scissorhands. I bet Otto and editcrow could become besties.
Nan
Now to write another verse to link to the hokku:
soft jazz playing throughout
the rotunda
hi nan,
sure, we can all meet for a virtual picnic lunch
you pick the park,
editcrow plays hopscotch on the checkered tablecloth
while Otto …..
nan, you fill in the rest
while Otto picks the first purple Crocuses, which Otto likes to change to circuses.
LOL! right in character! nan
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
*
Wendy C. Bialek
¤
posing as a scarecrow
for the still life with pumpkins
or
the scarecrow in repose
still fronting the back forty
Betty this one makes me laugh!
the one at 12:36 pm
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
*
Wendy C. Bialek
*
working behind the scenes
spicing the wine
revision:
working behind the scenes
to keep the wine spiced
*
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
— Wendy C. Bialek
between frost and fog
atoms
or better:
letting go
first frost meets morning fog
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
*
Wendy C. Bialek
*
a crow dives into
the middle of the leaf pile
*
shaking the hand off
the friendliest scarecrow
*
shaking the hand off
the friendliest scarecrow
Laurie Greer
i’m belly laughing out loud!
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
rotating scarecrows
so we all get some shine
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
*
Wendy C. Bialek
*
diving into the middle
of the leaf pile
*
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
tossed honey crisp cores
gone by the morn
a startled woodpecker
misses his beat
dropping chestnuts
in her brazier
a pumpkin
takes a tumble off my porch
Tracy
nice auumn verses!
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
*
Wendy C. Bialek
*
the trestle table groans
with apples and gourds
*
chilly winds and warm hugs
drop in at the open house
*
A great image for the hokku Wendy
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
tossing and turning
between strips of light
thanks! john for your kind words.
nice one Wendy
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
— Wendy C. Bialek
a tattered bashō
sways in the wind
(me…skipping around)
thanks so much, Andrew….coming from you, a hokku and haiku master, that means a lot!
love the bend of your ‘bashō’
looking forward to more of your jewels!
sipping hot cider
from red plastic cups
a two hour wait for
a one-hour hayride
perilous attempts to
capture a selfie
hi michael,
love, as always. your senryu twist in offered verses!
thank you very much Wendy. Always loved the name Wendy from Peter Pan, you see i inconvertibly
refuse to grow up
me too! michael!
Well done, Wendy A fine and original hokku.
I suggest “Juggler’s Moon” might be a title….
thank you keith for your commending words on this opening verse!
btw: i loved your offering
midnight moon
a world
half awake
==Keith Evetts
I am passionately moved by your title offer and am gathering responses about it.
to come soon!
kieth and anyone else familiar with Poe’s short story, ” The Tell-Tale Heart”….
what if he named it “Under the Floor Boards”?
how fun would that be?
keith—-sorry for the typo on your name.
a dead giveaway wendy. point well taken.
‘a dead giveaway’
Rob….
rolling on the floor boards in stitches LOL!!!!!!
A really well-crafted and visual hokku from Wendy. Like my scarecrow below, homage! I was very excited to see my offering considered, thank you, Patricia.
…
a stylish scarecrow
flourishes his fedora
thanks for the hokku praise, Pauline
glad to see you posting again!
it’s fun to dress
scarecrows up
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
— Wendy C. Bialek
the soft crunch of leaf litter
in a morning fog
*
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
*
Wendy C. Bialek
*
the ground beetles arrive
so many hands to hold
*
Mother Nature
chooses crimson highlights
*
Clysta, enjoying
the ground beetles arrive
so many hands to hold
Clysta Seney
my pick is Side Show
orange and yellow leaves
swirl into her open hands
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
**
when you arrive
i have to wait
Nani Mariani
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
**
with a relaxed pace
grandchildren make a circle
Nani Mariani
.
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
.
Wendy C. Bialek
.
.
Great choice for the hokku, Patricia, and congratulations Wendy on this wonderfully visual verse – so easy to imagine!
.
I know that it is traditional to take the title from the hokku, and it seems most of the options have been covered, (I don’t have a strong opinion about any of the traditional options). So just being silly with the title suggestions: balls in the air, something on the side, side hustle, the joint.
princess k,
happy to hear from you and watch you freely interact, post. and learn….with all your wonderful questions.
thanks for your kind words about this opening poem.
your title suggestions are refreshingly fun, like your verses…. a writer who thinks out of the box.
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
grandson’s first cry
polishing familiarity
Nani Mariani
Congratulations dear Wendy
?
thanks for dropping by, Nani and sharing your leaves.
here’s one for you:
hard to spot the deer
camouflaged by fall foliage
(deer viewing Upstate NY, for pleasure and hopes of touching photographs)
Thank you, dear Wendy.
A deer that is making love or a deer that is heartbroken, hidden by thick leaves..
yes….open-ended! Nani
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
– Wendy C. Bialek
*
just a flash of pink
as the jay flies
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
– Wendy C. Bialek
*
the squirrel’s sleight of hand
as it buries acorns
hi ben
i like your ‘squirrel’s sleight of hand’
scents of cinnamon rolls
mingle with leaf reds and browns
glad to see you back posting.
nice one…john d.
Excellent verse for the hokku! Congratulations, Wendy!!
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
– Wendy C. Bialek
*
bright toothsome smiles
on front porch pumpkins
how great to hear from you, Betty, again, how are you and the “porch pumpkins” braving all those storms?
thanks again for your very kind words about this hokku
and the current and future verses you ably share.
Wendy, we’re fine. Mostly. Worst storms tend to go around us, thankfully.
Now dealing with triple digit heat indexes already…106° predicted heat index today. Fun times! ?
betty…
i hope writing about autumn…helps to cool things down for you all!
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival (Wendy C. Bialek)
.
sweet sticky fairy floss
by any other name
.
(I believe the American term for “fairy floss” is “cotton candy”. :-) Couldn’t help myself.)
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival (Wendy C. Bialek)
.
a file of judges
considers the pumpkins
.
Excuse me….still in shock and disbelief!
What an honour, Patricia! a first for me….to
have a verse accepted as hokku, and what
makes this so special, is that it comes from
a tender, patient, compassionate, fair and committed sabaki,
i so look up to and admire like the moon! Thank you, Patricia. for seeing worthiness in this verse…and seeing above and beyond it. It feels so good
to be totally understood.
i have enjoyed the effort (shine) and pick (focal beam) to all the long and bold offers… you have listed and credited Thursday! much appreciation for your thoughtful, clear list of the “to dos” and the knots “to avoid” for next week’s wakiku.
Happy to have this special opportunity to “start off” our new ‘soon to be named’ renku with all the party goers here.
i trust whatever title is given will be the most fitting.
and yes, i will still actively, participate, as i love hanging out and learning with you all, reading your offers and hearing your thoughts (as well as,
sharing my words and thoughts with this brilliant group).
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
Congratulations, Wendy! Well done. I can see the scene, with a smile.
An excellent choice for the hokku, in my view, Patricia.
Well done all the people with verses in the long and short lists, too. I do like the idea of showing these lists, Patricia. Very educational. I’m hoping you’ll continue to show such lists throughout.
thank you for your cheerful and generous comment on this hokku, Lorin….so glad to see you smiling and back in renku action. Loving the playfulness of your contributions and comments.
for sure, resubmit yours for the next moon verse, coming before we know it!
ah, but Wendy, your hokku IS the moon verse for this renku. Once a subject has been included, it isn’t used again. No more moon verses. No more balls or jugglers, no more harvests, etc. for this renku.
(as far as I know, that is. Patricia might be able to expand my understanding on this subject.)
i wouldn’t give up the moon’s return yet, Lorin!
IF the schema on page 47 in RR is used…
we have another chance occurrence on
verse 15 (long) for either an optional winter/summer moon.
Patricia,
Many thanks for the long collection of the ‘also considered’. It gives encouragement to many, and also indicates the kinds of things you’re looking for . in this case something more than just seasonal description. Also the characteristics for v2 are specific & useful.
I hope the ‘also rans’ will continue. As for the tile, any of the suggestions will do for a provisional one, this could be re-considered after the 20 verse are completed.
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
our quiet organiser
thankful for blue skies
late pears & russets
pile the produce tables
a winemaker
sells presses yeasts & jars
Dick,
Thank you for reading and responding so generously to this, hokku!
Isn’t it also, so compassionate, that we have been luckily, provided a contact
“number” in which to call out our editing prefs?
Congratulations, Wendy! What a fantastic way to begin our renku, Patricia. I so enjoyed your sharing your long and short lists as well. Super helpful.
Title: I really like all the possibilities in Side Show.
the welcome mat
worn but ready
putting together
Mom’s pumpkin pie
Welcome back, Eavonka! I adore your welcoming and unifying spice you
sprinkle in the air; openly exuberant in your renku verses and comments.
thank you, again….as we embark on this fabulous journey, together with our
guiding sabaki angel, Patricia.
Thank you Patricia for your beautiful process and choice! Wendy, I immediately loved this verse of yours and of course, I continue to!
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
— Wendy C. Bialek
between near and shore
haystacks
thank you so much, Pamela….everything you do and say here
is always heartfelt and appreciated!
Congrats, Wendy!
ancient oak now
our feast day table
the rich harvest aroma
paired with that of fallow
children’s laughter
staying out late
hi Curt!
thank you for your participation in renku,
your words of encouragement to me, and
the healthy wisdom you bring out and offer to share
at this poetic table.
Congratulations, Wendy, well done.
Hi Carol.
Thanks for your kind words!
*
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
*
Wendy C. Bialek
*
the intimate glow
of a beeswax centerpiece
*
a horn of plenty bursts
over the table’s center
*
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
excellence beyond imagining wendy!
this appears so vividly in my mind–
playful moon joining the juggler’s dancing balls
hoping to blend in like another bright ball–
such a happy festive scene of welcome.
patricia thank you for choosing the best of the best
to bring out the warm welcome of the juggler,
the festival and this hokku.
thank you so….oh Rob,
i can easily feel spoiled by your words of praise!
So glad you had fun seeing this image!
Eager to see your responses!
*
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
*
Wendy C. Bialek
*
a brisk walk around the block
to warm the limbs
*
a hearty bearhug
as the long night gets started
*
*
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
*
Wendy C. Bialek
*
a line of leaves and
umbrellas dry on the porch
*
the door prize a box
of fresh mulling spices
*
oak leaves holding on
until the bittersweet end
*
Congratulations Wendy!
OK re title, I quite like side show. That gets my vote.
thanks for your kind words, Melissa
and i agree that Side Show is a strong contender.
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
sparrows fond
of its small grapes
thanks, Barb for reading, responding and understanding this hokku!
Congratulations, Wendy. This is such a kewl (no, Otto Correct didn’t pick it; I did) verse. It is saucy, but I expect nothing less from you.
Suggested title off the top of my head: Side Show
Patricia, thanks for taking on this commitment and also for considering one of my verses for the hokku especially since there were so many outstanding verses you could have selected.
Verses will come later.
thanks so much, Nancy!….nice to know Otto is kept in check!
LOL!
so eloquent
slang like that
i welcome anytime!
looking forward to all your keen offerings
Wonderful, Wendy! So many possibilities with this beautiful, lively verse!
Thanks, Patricia, for giving us the long and short of your decision! I love the insight into the process and of course, am thrilled to be part of the list.
*
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
*
Wendy C. Bialek
*
a glass of red
to warm the chilly hands
*
uncorking the red in a blaze
of crisp maple leaves
so happy to hear your enthusiasm, Laurie.
love watching you methodically going through
all the possible links to be found! love all your creative and playful
leaps…your works are pure entertainment mixed with strong dashes of whimsy as well as intelligence!
Congratulations Wendy! I also loved your salute to the desert aurora. Perhaps “Harvest Sideshow” as a possible working title? Looking forward to your guidance on this renku Patricia and honored to be on your short list.
oops, not short list, considered. sorry.
Hmmm–I kinda like “Harvest Sideshow,” Clysta. Thanks for the suggestion.
i agree, Patricia…this is a creative combo, from Clysta’s kitchen.
Thanks for your double congrats! double gratitude, Clysta!
doubling my pleasure…to have you involved here again!
very much like your offer for the working title!
Congratulations, Wendy, on a fine poem! It’s a wonderful hokku selection, Patricia!
“Harvest Festival” sounds like a good title, or something similar, such as “Fall Fair.”
+++
peanut shells littering
the Ferris wheel line
at the ticket taker’s feet
bouquets of red stubs
a painted grimace
on the clown’s face
bodies crowding
the bright midway
roasted corn
in the breeze
fun house mirrors
reflecting smiles
in the distance
a calliope’s song
Another suggestion…
+++
between fireworks
the twinkling stars
Thanks for weighing in, Richard, on the title.
I like your verses, as well, but, except for the “roasted corn” verse, they all are too close to the carnival scene. But please keep writing–the more the better.
Thanks for the feedback, Patricia! Here’s one more…
+++
the scarecrow’s arms
pointing up and down
A couple more…
+++
water icing over
in the birdbath
numbers invisible
on the frosted sundial
“. . . except for the “roasted corn” verse, they all are too close to the carnival scene. ” – Patricia
.
Patricia, a query: should not the wakiku be close to the hokku, supporting it?
(Then the 3rd verse, the daisan, is the ‘break-away’ verse, and should have no relation to the carnival scene?)
Lorin–yes, I’d agree the wakiku can be close . . . but not too close.
Thanks, Patricia. :-)
Richard….thank you for your special words about my poem…and all your past, present. and future contributions to our renku