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The Renku Sessions: Timber Smoke – Week 24

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Greetings and welcome to The Haiku Foundation’s current Renku Session entitled, ‘Timber Smoke’. I am Marshall Hryciuk of Toronto, Canada and I will be leading this session through a 36-link kasen renku.

 

Again, surprised am i by how comfortably at home we are with other-worldly demons and supernatural creatures:

 

sewing up an open wound
on the dragon’s flank

Tracy Davidson

 

Beyond affording food to the alien, here we’re rendering succour to it by helping a wound to heal. Could it be that the scarecrow is using her own thread? After all, at the turn of the lunar New Year in two weeks it will be the Year of the Wood Dragon~

Diction-wise i love the trochaic base to both lines; stress/unstressed, with the last unstressed beat left out so the two last monosyllabic stressed words, “wound’ and “flank” receive extra emphasis. Has the feel of the ‘push-in’ = stressed and ‘pull-out’ = unstressed.

“Flank” is a bit of a surprise and could have overtones of a battlefield and a resistance to invasion.

Great stuff, Tracy Davidson, thank-you.

 

Back to the terrestrial realm now; though perhaps with celestial aspirations. We need 3 lines, summer seasonality, remembering, no flowers, no moon and no fabric or aid. But, with the exception of birds, almost everything else in between.

Happy linking
Marshall

 

 

 

Timber Smoke (so far)

 

nothing dimmed yet
timber smoke scent
sifts into the house

Marshall Hryciuk

 

one by one
I pick plums off of the ground

Alfred Booth

 

a file of cars
overtaking a tractor
on the mountain road

Keith Evetts

 

drawn out deer notes
echo in the coolness

Betty Shropshire

 

even paler
than the clearing fog
day moon

Mary White

 

handprints  and crumbs
I would miss them

Pamela Garry

 

giving pollen
a lift
on the bicycle bells

Laurie Greer

 

the tiffany blue
of 3 eggs in a nest

Eavonka Ettinger

 

scattered spores
following a random trail
through landmines

John Hawkhead

 

attempted murder
by the morality police

Rob Barkan

 

next door’s dog
barks
at our snowman

Carol Jones

 

the mailman’s breath
faintly white

Keith Evetts

 

Jacques Brel singing
“in the port of Amsterdam”
on the radio

Alfred Booth and Marshall Hryciuk

 

a whirligig of leaves
sweeps the deck clean

Wendy C. Bialek

 

evening begins
with a gift of opal
moonlight

Marion Clarke

 

beachcombers trade shells
as the tide comes in

Jonathan Alderfer

 

a morning glory
the hummingbird
unfolds

madeleine kavanaugh

 

stepping from the change room
in her prom gown

Laurie Greer

 

her scent
on the pillow
the morning after

Andrew Shimield

 

some vows
break easier than twigs

Dan Campbell

 

hand-calligraphed
happy new year postcard
smudge and all

Pamela Garry

 

hard to forget the party
and my off-tune singing

Biswajit Mishra

 

a blackbird tapping–
smiles and thanks me for
the seed

Melissa Dennison

 

sewing up an open wound
on the dragon’s flank

Tracy Davidson

 

 

 

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This Post Has 134 Comments

  1. sewing up an open wound

    on the dragon’s flank
    – Tracy Davidson (LOVE)

    we pop the eyes
    of ripe longan
    at the night market

  2. sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank

    Tracy Davidson
    *
    family photos
    when mum and dad
    were still together

  3. paying in billon
    to enter an oven
    at the ren faire

    tyed
    in this steampunk corset
    my buns joust burning

    damselfly lifts
    its purple blade in obelisk
    cooling by the moat

  4. sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank

    Tracy Davidson
    *
    reading vacations
    untaken into the lines
    of a contrail

  5. I’m a little late to the party this week. Thank you, Marshall, for picking my verse and for your commentary.
    Thanks, also, to all those who commented. Much appreciated.

    the burning flame
    of a summer fling
    five years on

    she surrenders
    her castle
    to the sand crabs

    1. your comments are well-deserved tracy.
      as for your latest two: double wow,
      you knocked us out of the park

    2. wonderful writing tracy…loving your ‘surrender’ one….so much!
      kudos for keeping up the theme….it has become an inspiration
      for me….

  6. sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank

    Tracy Davidson
    *
    a croquet ball lands
    in the loop
    of a soaker hose
    *

  7. sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank

    Tracy Davidson
    *
    swinging a croquet mallet
    over the unmown
    lawn
    *
    the paths of croquet balls
    through the unmowed
    yard
    *
    f

      1. pamela…what an interesting way to look at this verse….i’m glad it became thought provoking for you.

  8. sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank
    ——Tracy Davidson
    .

    our canoe wake
    ripples
    the stars

    1. beautiful swap of imagery
      the symbolism is superb
      remove mankind’s artificial constructs
      and there is nature waiting, pervading
      (the fireflies existed way before light bulbs!)

  9. ozone air
    ahead of the storm
    snaps with creativity

    (true story—summers as a kid, catskill mountain
    storms sent me scurrying to gather wood and
    hammer and nails and rush inside my bungalow
    just before the wind and rain to build in a
    creative frenzy, usually a miniature pinball
    machine complete with a pair of clothespin
    flippers swiped from the communal clothesline.)

    1. rob,
      i do believe there is a wonderful vibe of haibun ready to burst into publication….i can see its title as: ‘summer breaths from a catskill bungalow’

      1. wow wendy i am honored by your suggestion and will use your title with your permission when i complete this new endeavor!

  10. writing haiku
    while lying on the couch
    tips of the lead pencil – – –

    laughing in stitches
    from a joke about
    her lost bikini top

    woven motifs in scenes
    from ‘little murders’
    ~power outages~

    1. oopsy…correcting this one for summer seasonality:

      writing haiku
      while lying on the sand
      tips of the lead pencil – – –

  11. sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank

    Tracy Davidson
    *
    campers advancing
    from boondoggles
    to orb webs
    *
    the campers
    learn weaving
    from a spider
    *
    an orb weaver
    takes over
    a forgotten trellis
    *

  12. Congrats Tracy, a powerful verse!

    feeling the heartbeats
    of the bait
    in my hand

    standing behind
    the scarecrow
    to pee

    a scarecrow
    with a nest
    for a heart

    ravens resting
    in a scarecrow’s
    shade

    1. That’s some amazing rapport you have with the scarecrows! Love the one with the nest for a heart!

  13. sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank

    Tracy Davidson
    *
    the first cool daubs
    of sunblock
    down her back
    *
    another sweet daub
    of sunblock
    on her back
    *

  14. sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank

    Tracy Davidson
    *
    a rainbow flag
    of dripping
    popsicles

  15. pushing the puppies
    in a pink stroller
    at the sidewalk sale

    the poodle trotting
    in pink booties
    at the sidewalk sale

    the Puli mops
    the sidewalk
    at the sidewalk sale

  16. dog and i
    see our panting selves
    in each other’s sunglasses

    napping with
    a wet towel
    wrapped around my dreams

      1. you are correct, rob…..if ‘napping’ takes place during the daytime…saying ‘daydreams’ would be redundant.
        thank you!

        writing haiku
        while lying on the couch
        the tip of the lead pencil –

  17. cicada pings
    from outer space
    to inner space

    sun warms the stones
    of the dry river bed
    shaped like fishes

  18. sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank

    Tracy Davidson

    the dog’s toy
    good as new
    after a deep siesta on dad’s hammock

  19. love your verse, tracy and your imagination!
    marshall…another creative gem pick!

    sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank

    Tracy Davidson

  20. (Back after some important issues.)
    **
    sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank
    — Tracy Davidson

    year-round
    summer’s heat
    comes to visit
    **

    turquoise waters
    surveying
    the coral reefs
    **

    oasis
    reading Rilke
    the book of hours
    **

  21. sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank
    ——Tracy Davidson
    .

    wildfire
    lingers in the foothills
    then moves on
    .

    cultivating the garden
    a quartz arrowhead
    appears
    .

    dust devil
    calligraphy
    awaits translation

    1. yes, i agree with rob, loving the ‘translation’ part, jonathan.

      foreshadow reading
      writing on the walls
      the script of dust devils

  22. sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank
    — Tracy Davidson

    bleeding heart
    in Marlene’s garden
    where paintings are done

  23. sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank

    Tracy Davidson

    tracy–so full of compassion for a creature
    fresh from battle in your fantasy world.
    this one is very special as is your perfect
    selection marshall.

  24. cannon-balling
    off lake cliffs
    shouts reverberating

    high mountain camp
    stars bend so close
    they can be touched

    1. I hesitate to use mountain since it was in one of the first verses I can change to another term, but the effect will change. You simply cannot experience stars that close unless you are high on a mountain. Which I have been privileged to do. There is nothing like it.

    2. high mountain camp
      stars bend so close
      they can be touched

      carolyn vander vegt

      the stars ‘bending close’ makes
      this one special, as if they want
      to touch the humans who have
      made the effort to get closer to them.

    1. why it took me three days to get it…..i don’t know….nancy
      they say some of the best ones….take awhile to kick in….(a kin to dried plums)
      i am lol in sticthes….now!!!!!

  25. Congratulations Tracy on your verse.
    sewing up an open sound
    on the dragon’s flank

    in a hammock
    staring up
    at the stars
    .
    staring up
    at the sky
    from the hammock

    1. Sorry Tracy
      seeing up an open wound
      on the dragon’s flank
      -Tracy Davidson

      Darn autocorrect!

  26. sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank

    Tracy Davidson
    *
    steering the old inner tube
    with two hands
    and a toe
    *
    another go
    round the pond
    in a patched inner tube
    *
    showing up at the pool
    in an inner tube
    to die for
    *
    a tell tale hiss
    from the tube as he rounds
    the rocky stream
    *

    half out
    of the old

  27. hot cup of coffee
    after his play
    in the hot sun

    beach resort
    her regular visit
    to play shells

  28. a vigorous
    saddle soaping for
    the new fielder’s glove

    the first night game
    ends in a
    shut out

    the home team’s
    first pitch gets lost
    in the lights

  29. Well written, Tracy, congratulations. Great choice, Marshall, enjoyed reading your thoughts on the verse.

  30. Yay, Tracy! I simply love your verse, and I’m delighted Marshall selected it.

    sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank

    Tracy Davidson

    a rabbit hops
    through a field
    of red poppies

  31. a blackbird tapping–
    smiles and thanks me for
    the seed

    sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank
    25
    presidential lady
    fiddling with the pistol
    starts the summer race

    a strayed angel
    plucking a rose from the hedge
    flies up and away

    the crowd shudders
    as beasts on the carnival float
    wave machetes

    1. ‘strayed angel’ is a beautiful fantasy
      image, dick–love this!
      (‘strayed’ makes it unique,
      there’s a story in there)

  32. Congratulations, Tracy! This is a tremendous verse. Thanks, again, Marshall, for the comments and direction.
    **

    sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank

    Tracy Davidson
    *
    sun fades the scar
    to a perfect
    tan line
    *
    a sun-faded scar
    refuses
    to tan
    *
    nursing an iced tea
    through the endless
    hot day
    *
    nursing a sun tea
    through the long heat
    of the day
    *

  33. Congratulations Tracy! A perfect choice. This verse is so tender and at the same time filled with such .magic and wonder. Thank-you Marshall for such a compelling insight. Enjoyed reading about the diction!

  34. Beautiful! Touching! Congratulations Tracy and Marshall

    sewing up an open wound
    on the dragon’s flank
    — Tracy Davidson

    old tidings
    washed ashore
    the ink bleeds into the weaves

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