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The Renku Sessions: Side Show – Week 8

renku_300

 

Hello, Everyone:

Wow! Another good week of bumper crop verses. I’m impressed with the imaginative ways you were able to link to John’s verse which gave you precious little to link to. Especially since John’s verse linked to Lorin’s with the word “dance.” I was concerned that links to dance in this verse might become a circular cul de sac. For example, any reference to “waltz” in this verse would hark back to “Strauss” in Lorin’s verse. So verses with links to “dance” had to survive a test against the Strauss reference in verse 5. Even with that linking challenge, I found 53 verses to consider for this next verse. And here they are::


cooking her
platanos and frijoles
for breakfast

Dan Campbell

 

she takes
the lovely form
of a shifting sandbar

a dragon tattoo
prowls
beneath her silk kimono

on and on
wasabi love
on and

Jonathan Alderfer

 

she blows a kiss
past airport security
as he deploys

not letting on
his aversion to
flannel sheets

Chris Patchel

 

our names
on the land deed where we live
for seventy years

for seventy years<
they slept side by side, but now
it’s forever

after his death
the insurance policy
made me rich

John Daleiden

 

he knows the way
to my heart
is in the Insta’pot

Diana Ming Jeong

 

going this way
then that
with their hyphenated names

recording
our kitchen routine<
on a recipe card

labanotation<
for our turns
around the kitchen

keeping their vows
sharp
with daily practice

letting our love<
lead us
where it will

holding on
to each other
in a debatable world

coming home to the one
who never steps
on my toes

their two hands together
the perfect size<
for the baby’s kick

holding their church wedding
deep
in the woods

the old two-step
of marrying in haste and
falling in love at leisure

Laurie Greer

 

another
gin & tonic & now
separate beds

patient zero
flirting with death
and his nurse

Betty Shropshire

 

despite a big
wedding in public
vows in private

Richard Straw

 

Grandma still misses
the young man
who never came home

Tracy Davidson

 

our new
sleep number bed.
set to sixty-nine

informing the waiter
that we’ll have what
she’s having

Michael Henry Lee

 

he buys a metal detector
to find the ring
lost on the beach

the wedding
at sweetheart motel
no one thought would last

preventing her from tripping
he almost trips
down the chapel stairs

my husband’s curry
always a little different
than the night before

madeleine kavanagh

 

together in
our infusion center
yet again

the golf tournament
interrupting the final
scene; no fade-away

night after night
under one cover
a synchronous dream for two

night after night
under one cover
sepia dreams for two

Pamela Garry

 

against a quaking aspen<
i kiss her
for the first time

two space station astronauts
don’t mind the delay
or the zero gravity

halfway through
his descent into madness
she lowers a rope

Rob Barkan

 

still cheek to cheek
as the spring in our steps
revived by compression socks

safely packed face down
hula doll brings
the honeymoon home

Wendy C. Bialek

 

I swing onto
his Vespa
fully committed

I will as long
as you can
stand by me

Clysta Seney

 

he always
offers me a hand
with the high curbs

Eavonka Ettinger

 

in the attic
she places her portrait
next to Dorian’s

Marion Clarke

 

day after day
the honeymooners in bed
with Covid

Alison Woolpert

 

at marriage guidance
its one step forward
two steps back

teardrops flow
now you no longer
remember who I am

Carol Jones

 

in tango hold
I pull away
needing some space

Melissa Dennison

 

my dear husband
didn’t last long
after the wedding

they called me<
the black widow
after my third husband died

Pauline O’Carolan

 

years and years
later
still holding hands

years
and years later
grabbing his hand

Nancy Brady

 

admiring how
even her big toe
is tiny

meeting my daughter
for the first time
I sound like the one newly born

M R Defibaugh


Of these I chose ten to consider for the final verse:

may I have this dance
for the rest of my life?

John Daleiden

she blows a kiss
past airport security
as he deploys

Chris Patchel

*

may I have this dance
for the rest of my life?

John Daleiden

he knows the way
to my heart
is in the Insta’pot

Diana Ming Jeong

*

may I have this dance
for the rest of my life?

John Daleiden

their two hands together
the perfect size
for the baby’s kick

Laurie Greer

*

may I have this dance
for the rest of my life?

John Daleiden

patient zero
flirting with death
and his nurse

Betty Shropshire

*

may I have this dance
for the rest of my life?

John Daleiden

Grandma still misses
the young man
who never came home

Tracy Davidson

*

may I have this dance
for the rest of my life?

John Daleiden

the wedding
at sweetheart motel
no one thought would last

madeleine Kavanagh

*

may I have this dance
for the rest of my life?

John Daleiden

against a quaking aspen
i kiss her
for the first time

Rob Barkan

*

may I have this dance
for the rest of my life?

John Daleiden

I swing onto
his Vespa
fully committed

Clysta Seney

*

may I have this dance
for the rest of my life?

John Daleiden

they called me
the black widow
after my third husband died

Pauline O’Carolan

*

may I have this dance
for the rest of my life?

John Daleiden

meeting my daughter
for the first time
I sound like the one newly born

M R Defibaugh

And then it was down to these two:

may I have this dance
for the rest of my life?

John Daleiden

she blows a kiss
past airport security
as he deploys

Chris Patchel

*

may I have this dance
for the rest of my life?

John Daleiden

I swing onto
his Vespa
fully committed

Clysta Seney


If you were here, I would ask for your help deciding. I see both of these as equally strong and interesting, one up-beat, one down-beat. The renku could move either way. My final choice is Clysta’s — her verse reads like a direct answer to the question in John’s verse without using the word “answer” or any other word for a vocalization avoiding the possible throwback to “spake.” Clysta’s verse does link to John’s through the word “dance” with her use of the word “swing,” but her meaning of “swing” is not the dance but rather a throwing motion and so it does not take us back to Strauss and his waltz.


With that our renku thus far is:

Side Show

the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival

Wendy C. Bialek

a swirl of moths
orbits the yellow lamplight

Jonathan Alderfer

drifting leaves
pile up at the lock gates
on the old canal

Andrew Shimield

an inuksuk points the way
to the next adventure

Carol Jones

Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’

Lorin Ford

may I have this dance
for the rest of my life?

John Daleiden

I swing onto
his Vespa
fully committed

Clysta Seney


And now here are your instructions for verse eight:

  • a two-line summer or winter verse, the two lines should flow syntactically;
  • link to verse seven in some fashion;
  • the door is open for all topics: war, politics, death, or any wild or bizarre subjects (in this section of the renku the party gets going full steam — arguments, clowning, tears, all happen here);
  • for the rest of the renku, please avoid any subjects related to festivals or circuses, carnival acts, moons, etc.; also avoid mention of vehicles for the next six verses, avoid mention of dancing or performance art for the next five verses; avoid mention of art, music, photography, religion, and planets for the next four verses; avoid mention of stones, directions, or cairns for the next three verses; avoid mention of entrances, water, vegetation, or the first person singular for the next two verses; avoid any mention of insects, light, color, or trajectories for the next verse;
  • submit your verses by midnight PDT Tuesday, July 9.

To the Americans I wish you a Happy Fourth of July. I thank you all for your submissions and active participation this week. I wish you good writing in the coming week — and good healing and tranquility for John.

— Patricia

 

The Haiku Foundation reminds you that participation in our offerings assumes respectful and appropriate behavior from all parties. Please see our Code of Conduct policy: https://thehaikufoundation.org/about-thf/policies/#code-of-conduct

This Post Has 355 Comments

  1. Clysta your verse jumped off the computer when I read it…so terrific! And so, I was excited when Patricia picked it!!
    What a ride this has been…my first online renku…and I’m learning so much, Thank you all. Mimi

    Here are a few sparked by Clysta verse:

    passing tasseling corn
    by the roadside stand

    the early birds rev up
    their heat warning

    the traffic court AC
    on the fritz again

    the traffic court flag
    hangs limp in the heat

    in sweltering heat
    she repeats the oath

  2. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    requesting a letup, she
    mounts her horse with help

    farmhands load the horse drawn
    wagon with hay bales

    wholeheartedly she joins the
    protest and tosses her bra

    obligated to aid
    folk who are homeless

    dedicated to clear snow
    from mountain pass roads

  3. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    compelled to be like neighbors,
    townsfolk shovel sidewalk snow

    on a backyard swing the child
    soars to Beyond Beyond

    the Schwinn bicycle locked
    in a cold, winter garage

    in the summer kitchen
    two helmets gather dust

    allegiance to tradition,
    they hang blinking christmas lights

  4. I swing onto
    
his Vespa

    fully committed
    —Clysta Seney

    feeling fully fulfilled
    he fell to his death

  5. I swing onto
    
his Vespa

    fully committed
    —Clysta Seney

    next-gen view
    dyed in the head-wrap

  6. I swing onto

    his Vespa

    fully committed
    — Clysta Seney

    avoiding the curve
    ‘ball!’ declares the ump

    (inspired by Princess k’s softball verse!)

  7. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    dedicated to land
    conservation, she tracks rain

    loyal to ending earth
    pollution, they urge clean-ups

    dedicated to Truth,
    they crusade for freedom

    with conviction the couple
    trace their lineage t0 Moses

    dedicated to end school
    shootings, citizens march

  8. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    .
    Clysta Seney
    .
    .
    tossing softballs
    to the leader of the free world
    .
    a summer cold
    and other ways to explain a bad night
    .
    an ice cream cone to beat the heat
    and medicare too
    .
    a whiff of flop sweat
    from the debate podium
    .
    oh say can you see
    publius goes commando
    .

    1. Very wonderful verses, princess k and I agree with Pamela on “the tossing softballs” poem!:)

  9. maple wings drop
    on her rocky road cone

    cherry pit swallowed
    with a bump in the road

  10. breathing the carbon footprint
    of an ice cream truck

    tears fall to the tune
    of a passing ice cream truck

  11. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    “swing low sweet chariot,”
    on this final horse track turn

    wheeling the ice covered
    bicycle to a garage

    with gusto she shifts her
    summer haiku to winter

    the open air jeep ensures
    a brisk, snowy ride

    passage through road potholes
    is a measure of success

  12. Hello Everyone! I’m back from the long weekend! I hope everyone is doing well! 💐

    Patricia, thank you again for including me on the long list and the short list! ☺️ I am happy you enjoyed mine.

    Congratulations to Clysta! This is a lovely verse and the perfect link back to the previous verse with your answer. 🛵

    I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed

    Clysta Seney

    beach playground
    too hot to touch

    fast lips
    on a slow day

    her smile is caught
    in a slice of watermelon

    Diana Ming Jeong

  13. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    *
    Clysta Seney
    *
    streets thronged
    with splooting squirrels
    *

  14. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    *
    Clysta Seney
    *
    learning to sploot
    with the best of them

    1. I’d not heard of the word, “sploot”. A little focused googling confirmed that it is most likely to have been invented by an American radio broadcaster:

      Lorin – Q “who first used the word ‘sploot’?” A ” slang dictionary, 2021″
      https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/sploot/

      ” Where does sploot come from?
      Sploot is part of a growing lexicon of DoggoLingo, which uses cute, deliberate misspellings and onomatopoeias like mlem, blep, smol, borf, and heckin to fawn over man’s best friend online—and the many, many pictures and videos we post of them.”

      While the exact origins of sploot are unclear, lexicographer Grant Barrett of the A Way with Words radio show has suggested that the term sploot may riff on the word splat to characterize the splat-like (flat, spread-out) appearance of a sploot pose. This wordplay mirrors other changes made to existing words in DoggoLingo, like the substitution of chonky for chunky.” https://www.dictionary.com/e/slang/sploot/

      and : https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Way_with_Words

      “Prior to the popularity of DoggoLingo, sploot had occasionally been used as a slang term for … messy, wet bodily functions or excretions.”

      Yep. To me ‘sploot’ something black & white & yucky, like ‘spit’, ‘ phlegm’ or ‘sputum’.

      (Sorry, Laurie, but that’s where the research lead me.)

  15. *
    police find the unlicensed
    fugitives in a snowdrift
    *
    crews place nets over beds
    at the fire shelter
    *

  16. determined to finish her run
    before the first flakes fall

    a limestone cleft
    surrounded by cooling cows

    out of a cold train tunnel
    two burning hot rails

  17. plenty of balm packed
    for her lip-syncing trail

    a pair of matching
    shades for her dog

    adding more cooks
    to the soup kitchen

  18. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    equivocating, she shifts
    gears and joins the women’s league

    blinded in bright winter sun
    she steers to a shoulder stop

    the steers ignore heifers
    in the pasture

    at winter campgrounds
    scents of axel grease and oil

    sweltering in summer heat,
    she scents half-burned gasoline

  19. pothole waiting
    to swallow her tire

    and for all you visual haiku fans:

    pothole waiting
    to swall w her tire
    o

        1. Lol, Rob and Wendy…brightens our day! … Love the haiku visuals, Rob!

        2. We do tire of having to change our bike tyres. (So much for our “common language”, again)

      1. i love doing it too!
        the possibilities are endless
        when i do it in photoshop.

  20. cooling fresh nectar
    in the fridge

    flutters up & down
    where her feeder hung

    peeling thighs off
    plastic patio chairs

    even the kissing gouramis
    (in their bowl) have headaches

    somewhere in this avalanche
    a leather glove

    a leather glove
    somewhere in this avalanche

    midday finding fingers
    in the unread chapter

    so cold she couldn’t stick
    around for the answer

    awake to fingers
    inthenarrowroadtorenku

      1. thanks, pamela….pretty, sure i’m not the only one who has experienced this.

  21. after the typhoon
    the forest pine rests easy
    ~ ~ ~
    after the typhoon
    the pine trees breathe easy
    ~ ~ ~
    the trees link up with mycorrhizae before
    the calm before the storm
    ~ ~ ~
    the trees link mycorrhizae
    during the calm before the storm
    ~ ~ ~
    smooth sailing for the quail
    who escaped the prince’s palate
    ~ ~ ~
    the stillness
    of the pines after the storm

      1. Not to speak for Melissa, but I would think the link is Italy – the Vespa is an Italian motor scooter, Naples is a city in Italy.

    1. John and Melissa, forgive me for barging in. I’m thinking that Melissa is linking “street” as that would be what the vespa is scooting on… John, I found myself a little lost at first too.

      1. John, I should have just said that “street” would be implied in Clysta’s verse in my way of thinking. Patricia would you be able to lend us a hand here?

  22. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    the judge reverses rulings
    of a lower court

    overturning the Judge’s
    decision, appeals court rules

    she swings in the winter shade
    of the bare apple tree

    abandoning pasture hills,
    they buy Saguaro land

  23. keyboard late winter wish
    for snow snow snows now
    .
    after july infernos
    a scorch of alive hills

  24. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    *
    Clysta Seney
    *
    no time to be homesick
    with day camp’s packed schedule
    *
    the cat’s zoomies at a halt
    in the heat wave
    *

    1. Interesting, Laurie. I hadn’t come across the word ‘zoomies’ before, so I googled around a bit. It’s in several online dictionaries and it seems to have originated in USA drag racing :

      ” I don’t know who gave them the name but the first use I remember reading about was in late 1964. They were built for a different guy’s dragster but they wound up on Frank Cannon’s Hustler V.
      Back in those days Popular Hot Rodding often scooped Hot Rod Magazine with the latest innovations and they had a feature on the Hustler V when it broke 200 with zoomies.”

      https://www.jalopyjournal.com/forum/threads/who-coined-the-term-zoomies-and-when.1117918/
      (scrolling down is needed)
      Somewhere on that there is the USA word ‘jalopy’, too, which I recall from reading ‘Archie’ comics long ago in the ’50s !

      1. Hi, Lorin–around here among cat people we know exactly what “zoomies” are: that rush of feline adrenaline that sends them lurching around like maniacs. Often it’s related to their metabolic activities. Interesting origin story, thanks for that!

        1. Yeah, I’ve had cats all my life and seen that manic play. Just wasn’t familiar with the word “zoomies”.
          (I do believe cats have a wicked sense of humour.)

  25. Hi Madeleine, Glad to receive your prompt reply. Thank you for the suggestion, I do appreciate it.

    I swing
    onto his vespa
    fully committed
    —- Cylsta Seney

    Coolness feels the air
    Scarves and sweaters everywhere

    1. Hi Nili, I am glad you saw it. 🙂 I love your verse above! I noticed that Wendy wrote a poem, just in case you didn’t see my reply:) . We are very happy you are here with us:)

    2. hi Nili,
      i enjoy all your offerings here. this new one, also, is a beauty!
      your words are a pure joy to read.

      i do have a question about this verse of yours, Nili Ghosh :

      Coolness feels the air
      Scarves and sweaters everywhere

      in line # 1 do you mean “feels” as in touch against the skin
      or ‘fills’ (taking up space) as we would say in…. ‘water fills a glass full’ ?
      (either way it is still, lovely!)

      Two other things i would like to add….

      (1) unlike some poetry styles…in renku verse…we only use capitals if the word requires it……or if we are quoting from something that already has caps. (not to begin sentences)

      (2) we try to keep the verse to one sentence that covers the two lines (or three lines) with exceptions, like in the first verse (hokku) of renku and other more casual exceptions.

      Nili, i know it is a lot to take in….i am sure you will do very well with this new form, very quickly….which is somewhat different from what you are used to writing.
      Welcome!!!!

    3. Nili, re your

      Coolness feels the air
      Scarves and sweaters everywhere

      In English, “coolness” (not being a living person or creature) can’t feel anything.
      We can feel coolness, though, and I’m pretty sure this is what you mean: “the air feels cool” .

  26. swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed – Clysta Seney

    achieve goals
    as high as the stars in the sky

    Nani Mariani

  27. swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed – Clysta Seney

    memories come back
    horse riding practice

    —Nani Mariani

    1. Nani, re your:

      memories come back
      horse riding practice —Nani Mariani

      I think you need the preposition “of” ( or “concerning” or the like) because your first line is a sentence in itself. In an essay or report, it would begin with a capital M and end with a ‘full stop’ . ( …’period’ is also used, for some unknown-to-me reason. )

      memories come back
      of horse riding practice

      memories come back
      of my horse riding practice

      (Both of the above would be correct)

      Similarly, in your immediately previous post :

      suddenly I realized
      not wearing a bra

      would be something like:

      suddenly I realised
      I wasn’t wearing a bra

  28. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed – Clysta Seney

    (a)
    a tiny paper wasp
    hovers around her nest

  29. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed – Clysta Seney

    things fall apart
    on the ski run

  30. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    determined to win the race,
    they purchase snow chains

    winter gear assures their
    survival next season

    shifting positions, she claims
    “it’s my body, not his”

    even in winter, word games
    allow players to shift gears

  31. I swing on
    his Vespa
    fully committed

    Clysta Seney

    (Maybe this version works better?)

    election poll workers
    arrive wearing ski masks

    1. Both are delightful and pertinent Alison; not sure why, but I favor the ski masks. Good to see you here.

  32. I swing on
    his Vespa
    fully committed

    Clysta Seney
    *
    poll workers arrive disguised
    as Santa and his elves

    1. we only need two rays*
      of summer sun

      *rays=lines

      हमें केवल दो किरणें चाहिए*
      गर्मियों की धूप का

      *किरणें=रेखाएँ

      hamen keval do kiranen chaahie*
      garmiyon kee dhoop ka

        1. Wendy, This renku offering is a clever response to Dan’s love/marriage renku verse, a topic which could have been offered for verse 6 or 7 if I am counting right.

          1. yes, you picked up on that, John!
            I’m also trying to hint out…that we are actually no longer on the love topic of this sheet (paper) in renku….as it appears in the schema…in j.c. book nijuin 20 verse.

      1. I must work on observing the no-go subjects! OK, no love reference in these!

        the POTUS debate
        off to a wobbly start

        the POTUS tries to downshift
        to a lower gear

        the landslide in Trump’s mirror
        is closer than it appears

          1. a poet undresses me
            with his one good eye

            This one will hopefully bring a smile to John Stevenson as he recuperates!

          1. wishing for a ball
            and a whip that cracks

            These rather sadomasochistic lyrics are from the Christmas song Up on the Housetop. I hope that this allusion satisfies the “winter reference” in this week’s party.

        1. LOL!
          Madeleine….
          i tried to write this in response to Dan’s “gear” above but it’s not
          going where i posted it.
          it does not represent my actual physical condition…
          but thanks for your concern
          ref. the difference between haiku and senryu,

  33. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    “look, Ma, no hands,” she says
    as she bicycles the path

    abandoning snow, they
    adopt winter desert life

    the judge reverses rulings
    of a lower court

    she signs asylum papers
    to detain herself for life

  34. it’s not cake
    on the welcome home hooked rug

    sleepy house guests
    some with boot prints

    late guest snow prints
    on the rooming house hooked rug

    sooner or later the sound
    of tapping….in….a mezuzah

  35. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    *
    Clysta Seney
    *
    the dog in a backpack
    as the dog days settle in
    *
    nonprofit calendars
    arrive with the dog days
    *
    flipping a hot penny
    to pick the next candidate
    *
    heat becomes the litmus
    for choosing a candidate
    *

  36. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    *
    Clysta Seney
    *
    rubbing alcohol on
    the cats paw pads to cool her
    *
    how summer brings on
    the urge to hibernate
    *

    1. Laurie,
      For me, it is just the opposite season for hibernation.

      Now for some verses:

      tuning up
      the snowblower

      turning up
      the thermostat

      fans positioned
      by the windows

      1. Nancy….not everyone feels it……i am sensitive to both!

        there is hibernation behavior for both winter and summer:
        it is called. ‘estivation’
        a summer dormancy, that is, long-term torpor during summer for survival of hot and dry periods.

        1. Wendy,
          I understand that. To me, that’s taking an afternoon nap because I can’t keep my eyes open any longer when it gets too warm. I didn’t realize estivation affected humans; I just attributed it to laziness or sloth. The things we learn from writing haiku and renku.

          1. yes, many animals experience this….some that are mammals….
            it is my belief that if the same physiological/cell chemistry exists along with certain environmental factors….humans are not immune to it.

          2. Nancy,
            i don’t hold an MD degree….if you are feeling this way…
            please r/o medical possibilities first!

  37. Congratulations on this clever and evocative verse!
    .
    I swing
    onto his Vespa
    fully committed – Clysta Seney
    .
    summer heatwaves
    rise from Trevi Fountain
    .
    speeding into turns
    blind to the black ice
    .
    no refund for the last seat
    behind a Nutcracker
    .
    avalanche triggered
    by an out of tune tour bus

    1. Arriving late th the Week 8 party and misreading the verse criteria, there are changes to be made.
      .
      Re, no vehicles; Question for Patricia: Am I mistaken that mentioning a tour bus is disqualifying? Is this a rule particular to this version/genre of renku? If so, how does this no-no come about? Please confirm if the answer is just because the renku style forbids. Anyway, here is an edit:
      .
      avalanche triggered
      by a driving downburst
      .
      Second, trajectory is tricky. Assuming the phrase, “speeding into turns” is verboten?
      ,
      How about
      .
      blind to black ice
      riders find results off putting
      (Pleeze don’t say ‘off putting” is trajectory. hehe)

      1. Hi, Jackie–I had to chuckle when I read about the possibility of “off putting” being a trajectory. I can assure you, it is not even remotely :)

        Yes, a tour bus is too close to a Vespa This is a renku rule to keep us from repeating the same things over and over. The restriction is for the next six verses. The renku tries to encompass the entire universe of existence so these rules of things to avoid stretches our imaginations. I like your rewrite of the avalanche verse and thanks for bringing avalanche into the possible verses!

        Re: “speeding into turns”–I guess by the second definition of trajectory “speeding into turns” might fall under the prohibition, but what I was really concerned about avoiding was anything that fell under the first definition which is the path of celestial bodies or missiles or reentry vehicles. We are five verses out from verse two; in one more verse the prohibition goes away. So if your “black ice” verse stood out as the best choice, I would ignore the rules. After all, the rules are meant to help make a better poem. If they get in the way, then they should be ignored. I do like the subject of “black ice.”

        1. Patricia,
          i also like Jackie’s black ice verse, but
          i was avoiding anything with black ice….because ‘black’ goes under ‘colour’…..is there something i am not seeing hear?

        2. Hi Patricia…quick question about “avalanche”. I’ve understood it to be a mid Spring season word (http://www.2hweb.net/haikai/renku/500ESWd.html#SPRING–THE%20SEASON)* so would it be appropriate here or are we just winging it with seasonality? Probably should’ve asked early on if we were adhering to any saijiki.
          Betty
          * the website link is old and doesn’t use https but it’s a bookmark that I’ve kept and utilized since I first encountered renku here under John’s tutelage as the sabaki.

          1. Betty, ‘Renku Home’ is still available and useful. Good that you’ve mentioned it, as not everyone here might be aware of it.
            All I do is google Renku Home and it comes up:
            http://www.2hweb.net/haikai/renku/index.html
            From that url, anyone can scroll down to the header ‘ Resources for Renku Writers’ and find:

            The 500 Essential Season Words: http://www.2hweb.net/haikai/renku/500ESWd.html

            The Traditional Seasons of Japanese Poetry: http://www.2hweb.net/haikai/renku/seasons.html

            LINK AND SHIFT
            A Practical Guide to Renku Composition: http://www.2hweb.net/haikai/renku/Link_Shift.html

            and, useful for this renku ( a twenty-stanza nijûin) :

            Shorter Renku by William J. Higginson and Tadashi Kondô. This essay presents the basics of two shorter types of renku, the twenty-stanza nijûin and the twelve-stanza jûnicho. . . .
            http://www.2hweb.net/haikai/renku/shorter_renku.html

            (We are currently doing a nijûin)

            There is a graph showing what to expect for the next verse, for instance, we started with Wendy’s ‘autumn moon’ verse, proceeded through 2 more autumn verses, 2 no season/all seasons verses, 2 ‘love’ verses and then there’s one ‘non seasonal, all seasons verse and, from that, to 2 seasonal verses which will be either summer or winter (Patricia, as sabaki, chooses which and lets us all know)

            ‘Renku Home’ should be helpful for all participants to stay on the same page, I think.

            Link to previous verse: good. Link to verse before the previous verse: bad. :-)

            Link and Shift: A Practical Guide to Renku Composition by Tadashi Shôkan Kondô and William J. Higginson. The most thorough discussion of linking stanzas and creating variety by shifting stanza content in renku to appear in English. Includes translations of topics lists used by Japanese renku groups (see table of contents in the article).

            NEW: Ideal Order of the Seasons in a Kasen Renku by William J. Higginson presents an ideal progression of the seasons and locations for love verses in a kasen (36-stanza) renku, as determined by comparing similar charts on these ideals from three different Japanese authorities. Also, the notes take up the range of variation within and from this model that may be very productive in renku composition.

            Shorter Renku by William J. Higginson and Tadashi Kondô. This essay presents the basics of two shorter types of renku, the twenty-stanza nijûin and the twelve-stanza jûnicho.

          2. Hi Betty,
            this is wendy here….i see ‘avalanche’ listed in spring kigo.

            but also want to add…that it can also be used as a non-kigo word…..such as: an avalanche of papers.
            (not to suggest that it is used this way in Jackie’s verse.)

            important to note…. as to Lorin’s links just posted (as it applies to position of verses) on the schema for this…(Patricia’s run), renku….Higginson’s nijûin schema is not entirely consistent with what it appears Patricia’s format is following.
            i am using the J. Carley’s version….and it is working fine for me, here.
            Still all the links are great to have! but to use only…when they apply to the sabaki’s chosen format.
            Otherwise, an invaluable source of free info. i keep handy on my bookmark shelf all the time….lots of good info about renku/kigo etc…from time-to time keeps updating!

          3. “important to note…. as to Lorin’s links just posted (as it applies to position of verses) on the schema for this…(Patricia’s run), renku….Higginson’s nijûin schema is not entirely consistent with what it appears Patricia’s format is following. ” – – Wendy C. Bialek
            i am using the J. Carley’s version….and it is working fine for me, here.” – Wendy C. Bialek

            Wendy, as far as I can see, Patricia’s format (to date in this renku) is precisely the same as Higginson’s schema.
            I think you should look again and confirm this. JEC’s & Higginson’s nijûin schemas are not exactly the same, but close, and both schemas are good guides.

            “Higginson’s nijûin schema is not entirely consistent with what it appears Patricia’s format is following.” – Wendy C. Bialek

            See below, Wendy: Patricia’s format is precisely the same as Higginson’s:
            .
            Side Show

            the moon joins
            a juggler’s side show
            harvest festival (au/moon)

            a swirl of moths
            orbits the yellow lamplight (au)

            drifting leaves
            pile up at the lock gates
            on the old canal (au)

            an inuksuk points the way
            to the next adventure (ns)

            Earthrise
            to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
            spake Zarathustra’ (ns)

            may I have this dance
            for the rest of my life? (love)

            I swing onto
            his Vespa
            fully committed (love)

            next – (ns)
            ———————————————-
            “i am using the J. Carley’s version….and it is working fine for me, here.” – Wendy C. Bialek

            The late (and much-missed) JEC has the Ninjuin schema beginning as:

            (hokku) – au. /moon
            wakiku- au
            diason – au/ moon

            In his schema he has two possible places for the autumn moon verse: the hokku or the diasan. It doesn’t mean there are two moons in the first part.

            You can check all this, Wendy, as you obviously have acquired JECs “Renku Reckoner’. (go to page 46)
            Looks to me like you’ve got a bit tangled up. :-)

            BTW, it was the much-missed JEC who introduced me to renku. He was brilliant and had a great sense of humour.

            Meanwhile, we follow our sabaki’s (Patricia’s) directions, to the best of our abilities.

  38. a playground dreams
    of laughter and cries

    the sound of an avalanche
    after his sneeze

    scooting for shade
    every lizard in the yard

    sudden rain
    sizzles the driveway

  39. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed – Clysta Seney

    the dedication
    of a paper wasp queen

    True story: I watched this tiny insect bringing food and water to her honeycomb-like nest throughout the scorching days of Summer, opened the gate carefully while she hovered. I don’t know if any of her little ones survived. In the end, there was just a sagging, empty nest.
    [ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paper_wasp ]

    1. Lorin, such a gift to be able to watch this fascinating insect caring for her brood. I hope her little ones did survive. Thank you for the link. I enjoyed reading about the different varieties…the paper and umbrella wasps. I found the video clip to be quite intriguing. :)

        1. Thanks, Madeleine … :-) Considering how cold and rainy it is here …Melbourne,Victoria, Australia… recalling summer is a pleasant thing for me.

          1. I am glad to hear that, Lorin… a wise thing to do . :) When it’s my time to go through the winter, I will remember that.

  40. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    my icy fingers pull up
    the stick in the cockpit

    we purchase a space ride berth
    on a future launch

    with resolution they join
    the firefighters corps

  41. Congratulations, Clysta!

    it’s standing room only
    in the hot courtroom

    street-racing teens
    are skidding on thin ice

    sweating on the outcome
    of his trial

    bones broken slipping on ice
    no impediment

    chocolate gelato drips
    onto the sand

    1. Thank yoy Pauline. I love the variety of your links. Tonight the chocolate gelatto stays with me. ;-)

  42. plastic reindeer
    dangling over the roof
    ~ ~ ~
    santa puts his hat
    back on after he loses it

  43. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    ——-Clysta Seney
    .

    sun, sleet, and snow
    all in one day
    .

    heat from a cherry log
    that dried in the summer sun

  44. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed – Clysta Seney

    the bike swerves ’round a WASP
    demonstration

    ( I couldn’t resist. :-) )

    Just in case anyone is unfamiliar with WASP – It’s short for ‘White Anglo-Saxon Protestants’. And “vespa” is Italian for wasp.

    1. Just wondering Lorin, is the demonstration for wasps or against them?

      1. :-) thanks for commenting, Madeleine. I like your humour. :-)
        I imagine that a WASP demonstration would be by WASP demonstrators, and therefore for WASPS and against non-WASPS.

        1. Got it, Lorin…the small percentage in the group that makes it difficult for everyone.

          1. Lorin, hope the weather is warming for you in Melbourne, or will be soon :) :)

  45. after reading Dan’s precious verse:

    so many castles
    made of sand

    Dan Campbell

    i recalled teachings from psych. training classes
    and placed them into these images:

    caution the sand castle dwellers
    and behold their landlord

    1. ” . . . psych. training classes. . . ” – Wendy

      Wendy, would that be training in psychology, psychiatry or perhaps in the psychic arts?

      1. Lorin,
        my educational background in psychology is multifaceted:
        non-medical, Gestalt Psychology as it applies
        to human, adult/child and prebirth and animal minds and applications with the arts and art therapies.

          1. thanks, lorin….i will search it to see if it comes here. and check it out.

  46. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    we step to the ice cream
    wagon and buy cooling treats

    your hamstring injury
    permits no downhill skiing

    staunch supporter of life
    she changes parties

      1. Thank you madeleine. The marchers on either side have the real courage.

      2. aha!…madeleine….
        i see the possibility of an unapplied /uncommitted statement here.
        leaving the renku verse open-ended, as i believe this one of John’s is, (whether he wrote it intentionally or not) allows it to be interpreted in more ways than one. Thus, the shift/linking to it can be broader. i think of it as a double fish hook.

        1. :) Yes, Wendy I feel that was what John was conveying in his last statement, a broader perspective, encouraging other views…which I find very inspiring and I agree with. I love your term, “the double fish hook” explaining the shift linking, which for me, is still a little challenging.

          1. Wendy, even though the shift/linking can sometimes be elusive, it is still a joy to read and write. :)

        2. “Thus, the shift/linking to it can be broader.” – Wendy
          (to Wendy) ” I love your term, “the double fish hook” explaining the shift linking, . . .” – Madeleine

          What is “shift/linking”, Wendy and Madeleine? That’s a new term for me, so I’d be grateful to be informed.

          I understand the basic rule of linking …in one way or another… to the immediately previous verse and I understand the rule that we must completely shift away from the verse that’s before the previous verse.
          (The current verse ( tsukeku ) , must not jump over the immediately previous verse
          (
          maeku ) to the realm of the verse before that ( uchikoshi)

          1. Lorin, I am still somewhat in the dark about this link and shift principle …so I googled it. It’s really just how you described it, this is what I read: “…the core principle of renku is “link and shift”. ‘Link’ signifies that each verse links somehow to its predecessor and “shift”, by contrast, means that each new verse must shift away from the previous-but-one verse, and have nothing in common with it…” I am trying to wrap my brain around the three terms at the bottom, tsukeku, maeku, especially uchikoshi. Lol!

          1. or better yet:
            fOOd for the pOOr
            the snowy noon mOOr

            Very fun and clever Rob. I admire problems that offer solutions.

        1. fOOd for the pOOr
          the snowy noon mOOr

          Very fun and clever Rob. I admire problems that offer solutions.

        2. having trouble getting this to reply to Rob ?

          fOOd for the pOOr
          the snowy noon mOOr

          Very fun and clever Rob. I admire problems that offer solutions.

          1. Thought your response was fun too and a clever play on words, Clysta! :)

          2. thank you for providing food
            for the poor, clysta, very kind
            of you!

            now all this reminds me of:

            the rain in spain
            falls mainly on the plain
            (alan jay lerner)

          1. Is it the two large headlights on the motorcycle and or the large eyes of the actual wasp (compared to the size of its body)? … Or the “o” at the front of “onto” and the “o” at the end…lots of fun, Rob…lol!

          2. very close madeleine! but a vespa has a
            single headlight and wasp eyes is
            very good.

            OO is the vespa tires, my visual link.

            but you discovered another
            amazing visual! so i uppercased the t:

            onTo

            what does that look like?
            a vespa! tires, seat, and handlebars!

            https://uscoots.com/products/vespa-gts-300-cc

          3. Lol, Rob. Thank you for the wonderful images. I was able to see it quite clearly…of course the tires! Very clever! :)

          4. onTo….that is brilliant, Rob! I am so impressed…It does look like “…a vespa! tires, seat, and handlebars”!
            :) :) :)

          5. dang, I was hoping you could tell me what amazing food appeared at noon on the moors … a hawk fly-in dropping chickens freed from neighboring farms …. i had a restless night, we broke a 76 year old heat record and more than half the homes in our town (including ours) have no A/C. Glad to play remote word games with Rob B. like Lerner did with GBS. thx for the visual explanation, very creative and beyond my reach. love what I get to experience here at THF.

    1. Hi, Pamela–It’s lovely that John’s verse is suggestive of the Anne Murray lyric, but making it an exact quote would move it too close to Lorin’s verse which has a song title in it which is also in quotes. Thank you for the suggestion though-I do appreciate it.

  47. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    the blur of horizontal snow
    blinding us

    the ping of pelting rain
    welcomed in the swelter

    1. oh Pamela, you could ask any ?’s your big heart wants….with these wonderful pair of gems left above!!!!!

        1. Pamela, I concur with Wendy. :) I would like to add that I don’t think there is anything to worry about as our renku is under Patricia’s wise guidance. Great minds think alike… I quoted a jingle for a pizza in a haiku last year without realizing it.

          1. leaving a cliff hanger
            with a pizza jingle

            LOL! madeleine…share with us the words to your pizzaku jingle
            or i will big D, die!

          2. Awww Wendy and Pamela….thanks! :) I have to give this some thought Wendy, as it was accepted. Lol!

          3. Love your response haiku, Wendy….hilarious. Lol! Your interest is touching. 🙂 After I saw my haiku published, I got a funny feeling and looked up the phrase and sure enough there it was. I hadn’t heard of the pizza before and the company was located in a remote area of the country, to me at least. I consulted a loved one who had my best interest at heart and they advised me to leave it alone. A lot was going on at the time and so I did–now that I think of it, I would have felt better about the whole thing, had I contacted the editor.🙂

          4. I wanted to say that I find your words always encouraging and inspiring.

  48. I swing onto
    
his Vespa

    fully committed
    —Clysta Seney

    dog-sled zooming
    by on a frozen lake

    you’ll never see poodles
    pulling a dog-sled

    huskie heroes
    huddled by the igloo

  49. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    sidelined for a summer week
    with hamsting injury

    engaged in conservation
    she rations drinking water

  50. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    ——-Clysta Seney
    .

    an earthworm attempts
    to cross the highway
    .

    Holsteins chew the scenery
    behind the drive-in
    .

    at the campsite
    she realizes her mistake
    .

    in retrospect nobody really
    knew him

  51. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    she leans into the shadows
    the summer porch eaves cast

    not hesitating, they board
    Titanic Submersival

    with no hesitation they
    board the submersival

    with a leg up they climb
    aboard the renku launch

    setting sail on the newest
    cruise ship launched

  52. my hat flew off
    i’ll leave it alone


    his love letter
    pink

    walking together
    long cold clothes


    oh
    time passes so quickly


    once again
    thank you darling

  53. My hat flew off
    I’ll leave it alone


    his love letter
    Pink

    walking together
    long cold clothes


    Oh
    time passes so quickly


    once again
    Thank you darling

  54. I swing onto
    
his Vespa

    fully committed
    —Clysta Seney

    so many castles
    made of sand

    smiling snowman holding
    an empty liquor bottle

    center fielder rolling
    in the green green grass

  55. so hot the elevator fart
    stays parked in the elevator

    (with a nod to the late haiku poet, and editor….Adjei Agyei-Baah, one of the sweetest and selfless human beings i ever met online.)

    1. other versions:

      summer fart in the elevator
      stays parked in the elevator

      winter fart in the elevator
      stalls the elevator

      hot dog fart in the elevator
      hot dog fart in the elevator

  56. I swing onto
    
his Vespa
    
fully committed
    — Clysta Seney

    sliding backwards
    in the playground

    unbalanced and stuck
    on the high side of the seesaw

          1. Pamela, your verse brings back memories. I have been in this situation, once or twice…I couldn’t help penning this verse, just for fun:

            wait t’il mom
            hears about this :)

  57. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    they tackle dishes of cold
    sherbet on the summer porch

    their hot air balloon glides
    over summer desert saguaros

    their hot air balloon glides
    over snow capped mountains

  58. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    *
    Clysta Seney
    *
    no will of her own
    in the mesmerizing heat
    *
    robbed of her will
    by the mesmerizing heat
    *
    thrown off balance by the
    latest blast of heat
    *

  59. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed

    Clysta Seney

    the beach ball floats
    to and fro over the net
    ~ ~ ~
    promising to stay
    away from chocolate she only tastes one
    ~ ~ ~
    the stationary bike
    remains stationary
    ~ ~ ~
    It slips her mind on day 14
    to practice yoga
    ~ ~ ~
    faithfully watching reruns
    of “psyche” four years in a row

      1. Could be an era thing, here, Betty. Your verse sure brings back some happy memories.

  60. john d. inspired verses:

    rainbows reflect off
    their helmets

    mayo easy on the helmets &
    mustard squiggles picnic table

    feelin’ silly
    in the summer daze

    1. Thank you Wendy The linking for this verse is difficult in light of the avoid list.

      1. john d….You seem to be doing just fine….doesn’t appear you have exhausted options….but if it helps any, have you tried writing in the dark? LOL….Since ‘light’, too, is on the no-go list?

      1. LOL…and i didn’t even start my engine….yet!
        last week it was over 100 degrees F.

        so hot, used my tv remote
        to turn off my computer

        1. ooops! forgot, no first person, singular pronouns:

          so hot, used the tv remote
          to turn off a computer

  61. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    on the kitchen table her
    helmet beside fresh baked bread

  62. Hi,It was wonderful to go through all the haikus. Thank you. I’ve tried to write few lines on two topics.
    Rooftop haikus:
    Dusk
    Multi coloured hues
    Join zenith and horizon.
    The sun, warmest red.
    Night
    No stars in the sky
    Clouds shroud the heavens as far
    As I cast my eyes.

    1. Hi Nili, welcome to our Renku Sessions: Sideshow. We are very happy to have you here. Your verses are lovely… and full of wonder. Could you put them into two line verses and then separate each poem by a couple of line spaces? (If any one has any suggestions, please add. :)

      1. Hi Madeleine, Good to hear from you. Thanks.

        Dusk :
        Multi coloured hues
        Join zenith and horizon

        Night :
        No stars in the sky
        As far as I cast my eyes

          1. Hi Nili, you are doing great. I really like your two lined verses above. I’ve been wanting to offer you a little more information, as renku is challenging. This week we are doing two lined verse responses to Clysta’s poem which was chosen for this week’s renku, “….I swing on to his vespa…” and next week we will be doing a three lined verse response to the poem that will be chosen from this week’s verses. We go back and forth between 2 lined verses and 3 lined verses, which change each week. We respond to certain words and moods in each week’s chosen offering… Patricia writes about it in her explanation to Dan, to all of us below in the feed, which is an invaluable help. A book that might be helpful is “The Renku Reckoner, by John Carley ”. Patricia also gives us a list of what not to write about each week, above where our response verses appear at the top. Nili, there are a lot of rules regarding renku verse but it’s well worth it. :) I hope you continue to write renku verse with us!

  63. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    *
    Clysta Seney
    *
    too hamstrung by the heat
    to watch birds from outside
    *
    hamstrung by the heat and
    watching birds from inside
    *
    too hamstrung by back links
    to make a proper offering
    *

  64. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    *
    Clysta Seney
    *
    ospreys coasting
    on the long hot days
    *
    a nasty case of whiplash
    eased by the hot sun
    *
    jays sputtering
    through one more heat wave
    *

  65. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    .
    Clysta Seney
    .
    Congrats Clysta – So easy to imagine your verse, well done!
    .
    Thanks Patricia – I just had a couple of questions in regards to your remarks.
    .

    “I’m impressed with the imaginative ways you were able to link to John’s verse which gave you precious little to link to. “
    .

    Since this verse was slated to be a love verse and the previous verse was a love verse, wouldn’t the only necessary link be that the verse is related to love?

    .

    “My final choice is Clysta’s — her verse reads like a direct answer to the question in John’s verse…”
    .

    It is my understanding that subsequent verses should be in juxtaposition to the preceding verse and not contribute to a narrative, which is what your commentary suggests to me?

    1. thx, princess k. your ?s would not occur to me as I see any action following a forever dance as being a juxtaposition. i did get a book about juxtaposition in haiku but it was way over my head so I gave it to a library. perhaps the mystery will be unlocked for me here.

    2. Hi, princess k–Good questions.

      To your first: No, I don’t think the subject of love is adequate for linking two love verses. I still look for some link beyond love.

      “It is my understanding that subsequent verses should be in juxtaposition to the preceding verse . . .”–princess k

      To your second: I suppose a subsequent verse could be in juxtaposition to the preceding verse, but not necessarily. As you know, the love sequence always progresses from one verse to the next. This rule does build into every renku a hint of narrative even if the pronouns change. When the pronouns are the same, the narrative becomes more apparent–a feature that I kind of like. However, as you rightly point out, renku eschews narrative and so this dalliance with narrative should not progress beyond two verses.

  66. again the swift cools off
    behind a porch thermometer

    (a swift is a type of small lizard)

    just its front claws and tail pipe-
    out the porch thermometer

    1. Wendy,
      A swift is a kind of bird, which also might hide behind a thermometer. I wasn’t aware that it is a lizard. What I learn reading verses here! Nan

      PS. Have you noticed Otto has left me alone, at least so far?

      1. hi Nan,
        Glad you are back!
        You are right a swift is a small bird….and it is also a casual name for these small lizard-like creatures that we have where i reside.
        They are very fast runners, (thus the name)and are difficult to capture in photos… great ‘person’alities so i enjoy watching and writing about them.

  67. another broken horn
    on the scorching savannah

    trying to put the brakes
    on climate change

    too hot to wear leathers
    in the domina’s dungeon

  68. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed …… Clysta Seney

    handlebar mustache
    holds up the shades

  69. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed …… Clysta Seney

    behind the frozen handlebar
    mustache, old man winter

    winter rain on the wheels
    of justice until sunset

    jury stands by rules
    of law delivers before first sunset

  70. I’m glad this verse was chosen. It was my favourite.
    I swing onto
    
his Vespa

    fully committed
    —Clysta Seney
    +
    fields of barley
    ripen in the sun
    *
    fields of barley
    bend with the wind

  71. 6
    may I have this dance
    for the rest of my life?
    7
    I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    8
    off to the wars
    and the land of heroes

    snow on the ground
    over the mountain pass

    late arrivals
    are turned away at the campsite

  72. a Christmas tree ornament
    in the minutest detail
    ***************************************
    packing two lawn chairs
    for the drive-in theatre

    a whopping 58 dogs
    in the allotted 10 minutes

  73. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed …..Clysta Seney

    liberty-crowned runners
    linked by a bungee cord reach 15k

  74. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    we ride beneath brilliant
    July 4th firworks displays

    winter cold fogs my face shield
    on the grocery store run

    cycling east at sunset
    our shadows grow longer

  75. Clysta, i loved this one, the first time i read it! The utter freshness of being receptive to the ‘spirit of the now’! Congrats to you and our renku welcomes its new verse with open arms, too!

    I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed –Clysta Seney

    a rainbow reflection
    on the rambling road’s shoulders

    Patricia, you are so wonderfully, sharp and quick on your toes
    ‘our dancing sabaki’!
    From picking out the best fitting verses
    and acknowledging the subtleties of word
    usages.
    LOL! and learning that my attempt at ‘testing out the waters’
    with ‘waltz’ had me falling into the uchikoshi rivers!
    ‘thought Lorin would be the first to call me out of
    at my mea culpa!
    Thank you, Patricia!

    Patricia…Talking about ‘waters’….would you think
    my ‘rainbow’ here, too close to them?

    1. Wendy–I consider rain and rainbow to be atmospheric conditions, and lakes, rivers, and canals to be part of the landscape, wouldn’t you agree?

  76. I swing onto
    
his Vespa

    fully committed
    —Clysta Seney

    a captive
    to wayward urges

  77. I swing onto
    
his Vespa

    fully committed
    —Clysta Seney

    teetering on the brink
    of extinction

  78. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    we swim in the cool lake
    after our bike ride

    after parking
    we ice skate hand in hand

  79. Congratulations, Clysta, and Patricia, it’s an excellent choice in my view.

    ‘swing’ has many meanings, depending on context. In this case I imagine the driver driver is waiting on the bike, then she quickly swings a leg over and becomes a pillion passenger. And off they go.!

    1. Bingo, Lorin. You are in my mind’s eye. And I have a new word: pillion. Thank you.

  80. I swing onto
    his vespa
    fuily committed
    –Clysta Seney

    we swim in the cool lake
    water to cool off

    across the lake
    ice skating hand in hand

  81. Clysta, conbratulations on you poem chosen for verse 7.

    Particia, an excellent coice to link to the porevious veprse and yet move the renku forward.

    Thank yu to the Haiku Foundation team who post the work making it possible for the renku to continue.

    John Stevenson, I hope you are mending. May the get well wishes of the renku writers send you good vibrations.

  82. Sending good thoughts for John’s continued recovery. I am very appreciative that my verses are on this week’s opening list:)

    they gulp hot dogs from the food court
    shopping for July 4th

    ~ ~ ~

    boiling corn dogs for breakfast
    before the barbecue

  83. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    *
    Clysta Seney
    *
    finches nesting
    in an old carousel
    *
    jays ready for anything
    with a fresh set of feathers
    *

  84. Before i submit my verses i would like to offer my sincere thanks to Patricia for all her effort and in particular her work in acknowledging so many individual verses under consideration and
    my continual support to John for his successful healing

  85. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    *
    Clysta Seney
    *
    letting off a stowaway
    in the middle of the heat
    *
    making the trip last
    with field guides to the birds
    *

  86. could be the last
    Independence Day

    cry of the mourning dove
    Independence Day

    freedom rings hollow
    this Independence Day

  87. patricia i am humbly grateful you
    placed my verses in the short and
    long lists, thank you for that. i am
    in the fine company of so many
    other superb poems.

    ps–when you have time please correct
    my name spelling to barkan.

    1. Yikes! I did it again???? Maybe it’s Otto–I’m going to have to watch him . . . I will ask Jim to correct it.

  88. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed

    Clysta Seney

    love the metaphoric image, clysta,
    just perfect! this is so different from
    everything else and expresses such a
    vivid emotional moment, the supernova
    start of a new love—“i’m going with this guy!”

    patricia you once again had such a tough
    choosing job and you chose well. thank you
    for your fine judgement and continuing
    guidance as our sabaki.

    come back soon john, and gratitude to jim
    and friends for your timely uploads!

  89. A bit speechless here…lot of that going around for folks of a certain age. Thank you for selecting my verse Patricia. 🙏🏻 And, thanks to each who offer congratulations. Much appreciated. Chris, I was rooting for your verse and I concur with your recommendation regarding mine if Patricia so decides.

  90. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed

    a Hell’s Angel’s “old lady”
    seeks full membership

    Would some kind veteran out there opine on my attempt to shift focus in this verse? Is it “dead on arrival” for being too closely linked to a motorcycle club? I did not openly mention a vehicle! I note a couple entries shifting by using swing / baseball and committed / insanity linkage. Is this the preferred way to do it around here?

    My failure to fully understand this subtle technique is frustrating! Can anyone refer me to a “how to” essay / article? Thank you.

    1. Hi, Dan–your verse is right on regarding the link of a Hell’s Angel to the Vespa. You did not mention a motorcycle it’s linked by association.

      Linking is one of the more difficult parts of renku writing, I think. Here are a few methods:
      1) contrast or opposite: e.g. on vs. off, many vs. few, up vs. down, concave vs convex
      2) link by association: e.g. Strauss/dance or Strauss/waltz or Strauss/composition or Strauss/Vienna or as you did Vespa/Hell’s Angel.
      3) change the meaning of a word from one verse to the next–this is tricky because you can’t repeat the word itself as in the example of dance/swing–swing links to dance in that swing is a form of dance. but the way it’s used in the verse it’s meaning it completely different. To try this method do the following: pick a word from the verse you want to link to like “committed.” Look up all its other meanings and try to write a verse that has that meaning without using the word “committed.”
      4) link by scent: this is very subtle and takes practice: it has to do with echoing the tone or feeling of the previous verse.

      This is not an exhaustive list–it’s off the top of my head. Maybe others can add to this.

      Regarding your Hell’s Angel verse: it links very well with the previous verse. Linking is not the problem. The problem is that I have already inadvertently allowed too many proper names into the renku too close together :( and so I’m going to avoid proper names for the next six verses. I’m sorry I didn’t put that in the list of things to avoid.

      The only article on linking that I know of is in “Monkey’s Raincoat” translated by Lenore Mathew. In the intro she discusses linking techniques. Sadly, the book is hard to find and expensive. Maybe others know of more current sources of this information.

      1. Patricia, bless you for being so kind to offer advice on a holiday! I hope that it is of value to others here who might also be new to the subtleties of renku. I’ll try to put your tips into practice.

        The renko’s 3 line verse is also puzzling to my haiku mentality. For renku, a single image seems to suffice, whereas in haiku, this is usually avoided. Anyway, thanks and happy 4th.

        1. Dan–What I said before about linking is very logical; what I forgot to say is this–trust yourself. Your mind is a pattern-making machine and if you express what pops into your mind when you read the verse you’re linking to, more often than not, it will link.

      1. Wow! This appears to be the holy grail of linking / shifting! Thank you for sharing it.

  91. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    *
    Clysta Seney
    *
    forgetting the heat
    on the neighborhood playground
    *
    resetting the pendulum
    for the long cold days

  92. Best wishes for a full recovery, John. Another fine selection, Patricia. And congratulations on an inviting link, Clysta!

    I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed

    Clysta Seney

    under the bright clouds
    sailors scatter about

    night clouds scudding
    past a cell’s window

    after the vows
    a glass breaks

    registering again
    after a failed exam

    answering want ads
    one after another

    after four decades
    getting up at 5 a.m.

    memory gone but
    continuing to smile

  93. It’s always such fun sharing your process, Patricia. I adore Clysta’s verse!

  94. only tourists in Rome
    during the August heat

    a line for gelato
    around the Colosseum

  95. Clysta, this verse is a delight, full of sparkle and hope. A marvelous choice, Patricia and I love your reasoning behind it. It was a lot of fun reading the wonderful verses on the list, too … a very engaging renku adventure!

  96. Congratulations, Clysta, on this verse. It links beautifully with its predecessor.

    I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    –Clysta Seney

    wind-whipped tresses
    b!owing in the breeze

    the neighborhood agreement
    to keep sidewalks ice-free

    1. Thank you Nancy, has taken me a long time to suss out linking. Still working at it.

      1. Clysta,
        Again, congrats! To be honest, I still don’t always understand the linking aspect, either, but in my (warped) mind, I know what I am linking to in the previous verse. Sometimes it makes sense to someone other than me, and most times it doesn’t. It took me quite a few renku here to get any verses even long-listed, and even more to ever get a verse chosen. What I have learned, though, is many of my rejected verses become the fodder for haiku in their own right (write??). That’s one of the reasons I submit a couple verses every time…for the fun, for the practice, and for new ideas.
        Patricia’s explanation to Dan above is invaluable. I learned so much from those brief lines. ~Nan

  97. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    ——-Clysta Seney
    .

    she pleads insanity
    at the trial

  98. Well done Clysta and thank you Patricia

    I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    *
    Clysta Seney

    saluting the ants marching
    across the picnic table

    the detour view
    of wildflowers waltzing in the wind

  99. Excellent verse Clysta! Congratulations!

    For some reason it sent me down a baseball rabbit hole

    I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    ——-Clysta Seney

    she threw a curve
    that almost hit him

    her pitch was wide
    and he walked to first base

    she tried to pick him off
    at second base

    stolen bases
    not a factor in their game

    no runs, no hits, no errors
    only sunlight on grass

    with their game tied
    it went deep into the night

    1. changing these to present tense

      she throws him a curve
      that almost hits him

      her pitch goes wide
      and he walks to first base

      she tries to pick him off
      at second base

      with their game tied
      it goes deep into the night

    2. Thank you Jonathan. I love your set of present tense baseball follow-ons. How did you know our Vespa is headed to a Giants game?

  100. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    *
    Clysta Seney
    *
    seeking asylum
    from the long hot days
    *
    this movable feast
    of a picnic
    *

  101. I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    *
    Clysta Seney
    *
    taking the middle shift
    at the lemonade stand

  102. Patricia, thanks once again for the illuminating and suspenseful long list. Always fun to read. And Clysta: bravo on the vespa!
    *

    I swing onto
    his Vespa
    fully committed
    *
    Clysta Seney
    *
    how the heat drives me
    out of my mind
    *

    1. Cheers Laurie.Your variety of high quality and fun responses continues to awe me.

      1. Actually, Chris–it’s ok to keep the same pronouns for two verses running. It’s a technique that helps knit the renku together. But you can’t go beyond two verses.

        1. Thank you Patricia. I felt the two I’s stood like columns structuring an equal relationship; but like Dan M. alludes to, the nuance between tight and loose linkage of the form requires a renku master’s experienced eye. We keep learning from you. Thank you again for sharing your time and deep knowledge.

  103. I swing onto

    his Vespa

    fully committed
    — Clysta Seney

    breezes still
    this zero-shadow dog day

    counterbalancing
    this sizzling binary climate

  104. I am fully committed to this beautiful Renku trip! Thanks to one and all! Much respect to Clysta and Patricia! And ongoing thanks to the hosting team.

    I swing onto
    
his Vespa

    fully committed
    —Clysta Seney

    blinking eyelids
    laden with snowflakes

    blindfolded
    we feel mid-summer’s landscape

  105. Congratulations, Clysta, a well deserved placing within the poem.

    A great choice, Patricia, and I’m glad you explained the meaning of ‘swing’ in Clysta’s verse. There’s some pretty sharp poets, here, and no doubt there would have been questions :)

    1. Dear Carol, Thank you for your support now and comments throughout Sideshow. I look forward to seeing your art as well. Clysta

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