The Renku Sessions: Side Show – Week 6
Hello, Everyone—Earlier this week I heard from John that his eye procedure did not go well. At this moment I don’t know but I hope the setback is temporary and that over time he will recover. I am counting on help from Jim Kacian and Dave Russo until John recovers.
The choice this time was difficult because the link to “adventure” in Carol’s verse seemed to awaken the imaginations of everyone. As I read through the offerings, it became clear to me that our poem needed a verse with a positive feeling here and using this as a guide I was able to narrow the choices to the list below. As I mentioned last week, I also was inclined to try to find a verse that honored Bill Ander’s “Earthrise” if I could.
So here is my long list with the short list in bold:
Anders’ last thought
B4 he splashed down
“next time in 3D”
in the year 2525
five humans with
four O₂ tanks
June 7th
the sound of a shutter
heard across cosmos
Wendy C. Bialek
*
international
peace rules the cosmos
in 2080
at recess children
in costumes play
superhero games
doctors develop
DNA cancer cure
at Martian lab
my time machine
arrives at Earthport
in 3020
the lonely
decision to attack
the attackers
below Egyptian
tombs we discover
a new culture
John Daleiden
*
awake before dawn
the scattered troupes
trail the first birds out
packing some gewgaws
for the daily treks,
on the off chance
Clysta Seney
*
at the end
of the game he loses
his favorite marble
Mimi Ahern
*
lost in a book
slowly steam rises
from her latte
Earth rise
in the rear view mirror,
Voyager explores deepest space
Melissa Dennison
*
ivory netsuke
of a Tokugawa samurai
astronaut
long lost ukiyo-e print
by Hokusai
of the earth rising
Jonathon Alderfer
*
i remember the day
she told me to make tea
as she turned to greet the other guests
Diana Ming Jeong
*
which kid
will be first to find
Patty Reed’s Dolly?
Patty Reed’s doll
lives on
as a survivor
oui.
et quand est
l’happy hour?
Alison Woolpert
*
introduced
by imaginary friends
to his first real ones
no simple errands
in a city
under siege
Laurie Greer
*
Bill Ander’s journey
to space
edifying earth
madeleine Kavanagh
*
the graduates
throw their mortar boards
into the air
andrew shimield
*
Ander’s ‘Earthrise’
some years before Kubrick’s
great space odyssey
a space odyssey
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
when the horses dropped
camels were imported
with their cameleers
Lorin Ford
*
her bags ready
to return home
in remission
Tracy Davidson
*
chauffeur-driven
new mayor reaches town hall
on a tandem
Attard Francis
*
the sound
of national anthem from
the bombarded school
Milan Rajkumar
*
neeb evah
I erehw ees
ot sdrawkcab gniklaw
Dan Campbell
*
pride flags
line the walk
of South Orange Ave
Michael Henry Lee
*
at the whiskey bar
Earthrise comes up again
the day its shutterbug dies
Pamela Garry
So many great adventures in these verses—any one of them would give the renku a solid start. So I’m sure that you can appreciate that narrowing the choices down to one was difficult. I’ll mention just one that caught my attention and that’s Alison Woolpert’s verse about Patty Reed’s doll. I didn’t know who Patty Reed was until I looked her up and found that she was a little girl in the ill-fated Donner party crossing the Sierras in winter in 1846. She had been told to discard all her toys to lighten the load on the wagon her family was traveling in. She kept a small four-inch doll which she hid from her parents. The family was one of few who survived that terrible winter. The article said that they moved to San Jose and thrived. I was surprised to learn that several streets were named after them, and one of them, Reed Street, was the street where I lived when I first moved to San Jose! One learns so much from others when writing renku.
In any case I still felt strongly that we needed a positive and uplifting verse following Carol’s verse. And my desire to honor Bill Ander’s led me to favor all the verses submitted about him and/or his famous photograph “Earthrise.” As I sifted through them there were two that were almost right:
Ander’s ‘Earthrise’
some years before Kubrick’s
great space odyssey
a space odyssey
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Both by Lorin Ford
The first of these honors Bill Ander’s “Earthrise” and the second has the uplifting feeling I was looking for. If Lorin will agree (fingers crossed), I would like to combine these two to make our fifth verse:
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
If you haven’t heard this piece for a while, I suggest you play it and see if you don’t agree that this is a winning combination.
With that, we have our fifth verse and our poem will read as follows:
Side Show
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
a swirl of moths
orbits the yellow lamplight
Jonathan Alderfer
drifting leaves
pile up at the lock gates
on the old canal
Andrew Shimield
an inuksuk points the way
to the next adventure
Carol Jones
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
Note that I did not put Earthrise in quotes as I hope the capitalization is enough to suggest the photograph, but earthrise free of the quotes invites us to imagine we are on the moon looking back at our dear earth.
And now here are your instructions for verse six:
- a two-line no-season verse, the two lines should flow syntactically; this verse could be a love verse — or not.
- link to verse five in some fashion;
- the door is open for all topics: religion, war, politics, death, or any wild or bizarre subjects (in this section of the renku the party gets going full steam — arguments, clowning, tears, all happen here);
- for the rest of the renku, please avoid any subjects related to festivals or circuses, carnival acts, moons, etc.; also avoid mention of art, music, photography, religion, and planets for the next six verses; avoid mention of stones, directions, or cairns for the next five verses; avoid mention of entrances, water, and vegetation for the next four verses; avoid any mention of insects, light, color, or trajectories for the next three verses;
- submit your verses by midnight PDT Tuesday, June 25.
Thank you for all your submissions. I wish you good writing in the coming week — and good healing for John.
Patricia
The Haiku Foundation reminds you that participation in our offerings assumes respectful and appropriate behavior from all parties. Please see our Code of Conduct policy: https://thehaikufoundation.org/about-thf/policies/#code-of-conduct
Comments (202)
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Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’ – Lorin Ford
–
after 14 years Julian
steps again on native soil
she does a pirouette
to the dawn’s early light
Diana Ming Jeong
squinting into the sun
we spot the lost balloon
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’ –Lorin Ford
***
honeymoon ears still ring from
shells spent on the shooting range
*
i should have listened
to my cold feet
honeymoon ears still ring from
time spent on the shooting range
*
honeymoon ears still ring from
hours spent on the shooting range
*
The first 2 lines of some poems by Ted Kooser. I enjoy his poetry because, like haiku, he notices the everyday miracles that are usually ignored.
“Today, from a distance, I saw you walking away,”
“and without a sound, the glittering face of a river slipped past.”
“A Birthday Card”
“He was a big man, says the size of his shoes”
“on a pile of broken dishes by the house;”
“A Letter in October”
“I am almost home, while the fireflies”
“open and close in the sweet dark.”
“So This Is Nebraska”
“The gravel road rides with a slow gallop”
“over the fields, the telephone lines”
“A Gold Tooth”
“In a pawn shop in Wichita,”
“a gold tooth,”
“The Early Bird”
“Still dark, and raining hard on a cold May morning,”
“and yet the early bird is out there chirping.”
“A Rainy Morning”
Wonderful poetry Dan, thank you for sharing these ‘teazing’ two-liners of
of Ted…..now asap i must read more!
Thanks for letting me know Wendy!
she practices her pirouettes
on the kitchen floor
Diana Ming Jeong
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
the prosperity prophet
blesses flowers of the field
in streets, children chant war songs,
sing of fire, ash, and death
mating in mid-air
was quite a scare
she sure looked cute
in a parachute
my last words were o lord
I can’t find the ripcord
lol!
Hola Pamela, I’m glad you enjoyed my silly verses!
bewitched by the siren
call of the wild
my uber driver
lowers the speed limit
the uber driver
running on fumes
great conquests
on a minuscule speck
not living until
we’re together again
the last thing I’ll see
is your face
sent away
in an escape pod
struggling to break
the cycle of abuse
a strange sense
of déjà vu again
we both remember it
differently
***
get well soon
we all sign the card
for a renku master
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
her love song, a paen,
lamenting his war death
in minor key, he sings
of ripped away, hostage-love
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
the fighting shifts
from south to north
smoke plumes up
where cities were
pew kneelers drop
as congregants pray
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–
smoke plumes up
where cities were
.
I like the realistic gist of this, Richard. You could add something , for instance rubble., for emphasis. For instance:
smoke plumes and rubble
where cities were
(Unfortunately this is the literal case in our world at present.)
hope flickering off
and on like a firefly
hope a pinhole
of light in the darkness
hope a new dawn
and a new day
:)
her beauty
only cloud deep
tears rain down from heaven
quenching forest embers
as she frantically parts steam
her engagement ring circles the drain
two skeletons hold hands
inside a scorched suv
Poignant and beautiful, Rob!
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
early morning exercise
at the senior center
in his homily the priest
requests our charity
:)
Coming in late…loved your verses, Carol and Lorin!!
***
an inuksuk points the way
to the next adventure
Carol Jones
*
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
*
his buzz cut and uniform
freshly pressed just for her
Betty Shropshire
Thankyou Betty.
A very nice nod to armed forces.
I agree with Carol… this is lovely, Betty!
Neitzsche in a niche returns
again and again to the sacred fire
Or
Nietzsche in a niche returns
again and again to the sacred flame
Being playful…
superman makes eyes
over dinner at lois Lane
😉
harmonising
we sing in tune
twinkly eyes…
but such corny jokes
at the seaside smiling
how I miss you
the lucky charm you carried
now in my purse
pushing teddy
in my pram, you held my hand
dancing the night away
on the banks of the danube
horses hooves on
cobbled streets – Vienna
:)
rumor has it
they were seen together
Congratulations, Lorin, on your verse being chosen.
Wishing you a successful recovery, John.
Earthrise
to the tune of Straus’s Thus
spake Zarathustra
–Lorin Ford
generals waltzing
around war zones
generals waltzing around
so many wars
diplomats waltzing around
peace talks
I really like these verses, Nancy…poignant and beautiful and very .thought provoking.
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
in the concert hall attire
is come as you are dressed
singers leave Concert Hall
to tour the Rust movie set
follow prophets and think
good thoughts, words, deeds—the divine
symphony of lovers’ songs
serenades streets where we live
an ill-timed bout
of honeymoon halitosis
another odyssey
delayed by strikes
the gravity
in every vote
I love the Honeymoon halitosis, Tracy! :)
her ‘HAL’luva response
to his marriage proposal
Lol, Wendy! :)
we toast marshmallows
over a sacred flame
a magyar castle
ripples in the blue danube
Doesn’t Earthshine hearken back to the first line of the renku? Just curious, being late to the party.
Earthrise, I mean
hi Chris, and other posters/writers of renku verse,
What else i have learned from John Stevenson concerning the following special verses:
it isn’t only about the Moon verse…just to be clear,
it applies to all ‘designer verses’,
blossom/flower verse…..the example of a rose is a rose is a rose but a tattoo of a rose is not a rose.
love verses….love between adults only, not children, not pets, not relatives, not hobbies, etc.
“What else i have learned from John Stevenson concerning the following special verses:
it isn’t only about the Moon verse…just to be clear,
it applies to all ‘designer verses’,
blossom/flower verse…..
love verses ” – Wendy C, Bialek
Wendy, I may be wrong but I’d lay odds that John Stevenson did not teach you to use the expression ‘designer verses’ in relation to renku. I imagine you’ve carried that term over from more mundane things than poetry, things such as ‘designer kitchens’ & ‘designer labels’ . As is typical of advertising, the grammar is poor: labels don’t design anything, nor do kitchens. A designer kitchen is a kitchen designed by a person or a company.
We have moon verses, blossom (or flower) verses and love verses in all types of renku. Quite where these verses are placed depends on where whomever first designed the schema of a particular type of renku decided to place them.
Perhaps the person who first developed any particular form of renku could be called the ‘designer’ of that form of renku? Perhaps Basho put a sign in his front yard: “Basho, Renku Designer” ?
Lorin, i, too was put off when i first heard this term…but, i can see how when a sabaki is teaching renku to new students…it can be easily relatable.
You are certainly correct… John never, ever, used the word, ‘designer’ verse with me…..only Marshall used that word.
which is why….
i am perplexed by this comment.
not too long ago i posted here saying; it was Marshall H. in Timber Smoke renku who introduced me to this term.
Lorin,
I never said or intended anywhere that…”John” taught me that term.
John taught me what would be acceptable and unacceptable examples when utilizing these special verses.
Well, Chris, one thing we certainly won’t be having now in this renku, since we have Earthrise , is this old favourite song of mine:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IhDKHo2wapM
It always takes me back. ( The boy with the guitar in the photo is the late George Harrison’s son.)
Thanks for the responses, which answer, and affirm, my question.
as John Stevenson has taught me:
a picture (photo, painting, etc.) of something is not the thing itself.
I assume that’s about moon verses needing an actual moon (as opposed to a photo or idiom like ‘over the moon’). But this is about repeating topics (in any way).
Hi Chris, I believe you are right that writing about the Earthrise picture is too soon in our renku, since the first line of our renku is about the moon. Last week, in commemoration of William Anders, the astronaut who passed away recently, Patricia made an exception, by asking if we would include poems about him, his journey to the moon… his photo of Earthrise.
There have been great responses to Patricia’s request…wonderful that Patricia made this exception.
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival – Wendy C. Bialek
–
“Hi Chris, I believe you are right that writing about the Earthrise picture is too soon in our renku, since the first line of our renku is about the moon. ” – madeleine kavanagh
–
Well, Madeleine and Chris:, I disagree. My ‘Earthrise’ verse not “too soon” because it’s not a moon verse. (I would’ve thought that was obvious!)
–
I like Wendy’s hokku a lot, especially the play on a scene in which a juggler is juggling round things (balls, most likely). For a moment the moon appears to become part of the jugglers act. A distant full moon would certainly be the right shape and size to fit in with balls being juggled.
As I see it, that’s the beginning (but not the end) of the word ‘moon’ in this renku.
But, Chris and Madelaine, where, pray tell, is the moon mentioned in my:
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’ – Lorin Ford
??? Where is the moon?
If either of you want to say something along the lines of ” If we look at the original Earthrise photo we can see the edge of a desert place that we might assume is part of the moon”, but I don’t think that’s enough. Wendy’s moon is a thing stated and part of an image to be seen. The humour in her hokku is that, because of its shape and distance, it appears to be just another ball in the juggler’s act.
Where is the moon mentioned in my Earthrise verse? Nowhere! Earthrise is about Earth, as seen from space in a photo taken by the recently late William Anders. Earthrise is not about the moon but about the Earth, seen from space. It is not a moon verse. ‘Earthrise’ is the name of a famous photo of Earth taken from a spaceship, just as Strauss’s ‘Thus spake Zarathustra’ is a famous tone poem, based on a novel. Yes, in Ander’s photo one can see a strip of desert that probably is part of the moon in that photo but my verse doesn’t refer to the moon in any way, just as Wendy’s hokku doesn’t refer to a stage, the juggler’s costume or the hog pens in the background.
—
“”But this is about repeating topics (in any way)” – Chris
Well, what topic is being repeated, Chris? Please do tell! ”
—
p.s. I’m not sure, but I think I recall Patricia mentioning that this would be a nijûin renku. If so, it will be comprised of 20 verses. Unlike some other renku verses, the nijûin can have two verses dedicated to the moon.
I do know that in a ninjuin renku that starts in Autumn (as this current renku of ours does) , “the moon generally appears in one of the first three stanzas. ” according to William J. Higginson and Tadashi Kondô . So I’d say our moon verse hokku is in the traditional place for this type of renku : “one of the first 3 stanzas”
—
“Short: Twenty-Stanza Renku
The nijûin, a twenty-stanza format for renku, is the shortest format with a classical feeling in its overall structure and rhythm. With a clear “face”, two shortened middle pages, and a back page mirroring the front page, it provides for two moon verses, one blossom verse, and two groups of love verses, closely paralleling the structure of a thirty-six stanza kasen. And though twenty stanzas is little more than half the length of a kasen, the format provides enough room for the great diversity of a true haikai no renga. ”
http://www.2hweb.net/haikai/renku/shorter_renku.html
—
Chris,
repeating topics that is a whole other thing, that we can give a great deal of focus to… here.
however, since Madeleine informed you of Patricia’s interest to also include offers for tributes to “Earthrise” and its photographer,
the late, William Anders…that consideration had not addressed.
What i do so much appreciate about our sabaki, Patricia, is her ability to be flexible when a current event catches our attention and she agrees to be open to this flow….i experienced the same sensitivity in the “Rendezvous” renku…when we first experienced Covid, world-wide….Patricia allowed us to post about illnesses, etc. before the customary order for its mention.
Kudos, Patricia for your flexibility!!!
Look at how beautiful this renku has flowed…from the serendipity of a moon that magically appears to join earth….to the serendipity of a photo of the earth rising towards the moon accompanied with a fanfare of stunning music. (along with all the wonderful stops in between)!
Hi, Chris–Earthrise does refer to the famous photograph taken by Anders while orbiting the moon. But the moon isn’t mentioned and I thought earthrise could occur in other places in the solar system. So that, in my mind, gave enough distance although I admit there’s still a slight whiff of moon about the verse.
Lorin, I stand corrected and I meant no offense in any way. I apologize if I have caused you any distress. It was not my intention. I love your poetry and have always found your poems to be brilliant as well as inspiring. Yours is a glorious verse and I applaud Patricia’s choice for this week’s renku. I wouldn’t have wanted any other verse but yours to be in its place, adding so much richness to our renku. My only excuse is that I was trying to explain in my own clumsy way to which was a genuine interest on Chris’s part in seeking more knowledge on the subject. I fell short and did not answer the question well at all. I am grateful for your explanation, Lorin. I am grateful to Sabaki Patricia & to Wendy for their explanations as well, all helping to further the understanding of the art of renku.
Ah, Madeleine, please don’t apologize: you have every right to your opinions and we are all finding our way under Patricia’s guidance. I wasn’t at all offended or distressed and I sincerely hope you don’t feel offended or distressed either.
You are brave to question things. Sometimes that’s the only way to find out what we need to know. There will be another ‘moon’ in this renku, I think. (Patricia will tell us when)
I don’t know how many verses (if any ) need to pass before we have a ‘music’ topic- a link to a different kind of music in a different place might be acceptable… I don’t know, that’ll be up to Patricia)
I think (not sure) this renku is a Nijûin: http://www.2hweb.net/haikai/renku/shorter_renku.html
If so, then the next two verses will be ‘Love’ verses.
Good luck! :-)
warm wishes from cold Melbourne
I think (not sure) this is a Twenty-Stanza (Nijûin) Bill Higginson’s layout for this type of renku is here:
http://www.2hweb.net/haikai/renku/shorter_renku.html
If the Nijûin is the type of renku we’re involved in here, then the next verse is a ‘love’ verse.
Thank you Lorin for your wonderful and heartwarming response and for all the information. I will look up the links you have posted. I am glad you are one of our fellow adventurers in this enriching experience of sharing renku poetry and I am happy Patricia is at the helm!
I hope you are staying warm in cold Melbourne! :) Warm wishes back to you.
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’ – Lorin Ford
.
home at last a tall man
embraces his wife
.
I love this one, Lorin.
how to ask her out
in ASL
how to ask her out
in sign language
:)
munchies @ 3 a.m.
a strudel waits for subway’s footlong cookie
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ppe9o5CnoVQ
John Stevenson, may the second eye operation restore your vision. Wishing you a full recovery, you are in my thoughts for healing.
Patricia, thank you for your generous inclusion in the Week five verse selections. Your choice of Lorin Ford’s verse rings with the sonorous tones of Strauss’ brilliant fanfare. Well done.
Hi Patricia, this is great news about John’s prognosis following his second surgery…praying for his continued recovery.
Lorin, this is a marvelous poem, giving much musicality to our renku. Patricia, I did refresh my memory and listened to Strauss’s “Thus spake Zarathustra” again and I can see why this poem is a perfect fit. I had never heard of the Reed doll and appreciated reading its history. Thank you for including my poem on the short list.
~ ~ ~
With all the senseless events going on in the world, I often think of George Orwell’s writing.
doublespeak
takes over the ability to reason in oceania
~ ~ ~
cold war
preceding a colder one
~ ~ ~
a delight to see him
in the children’s features
~ ~ ~
The next two poems allude to religion. I am not sure if religion is still off the table, so these two don’t need to be considered. (They also don’t contain the appropriate syntax.)
the weeping icon
she kisses the glass in honolulu
~ ~ ~
no time to change
the children wear beachwear to church
I understand that after reading Patricia’s instructions, religion is on the list. I apologize for misunderstanding.
Hi Patricia,
if you would scratch “…a delight to see him…” off the list to be considered, it would be appreciated. :)
turning hotels into apartments
for those without homes
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
singing, I drive my Stanley
Steemer to the auto show
at the Opera House, I watch
modern family tragedies
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
the divine order—
road to Frashokereti
singing, I drive my Stanley
Steemer to the auto show
at the Opera House, I watch
modern family tragedies
This can easily also be…
i didn’t want see it before
but now i see my Dad everywhere
Diana Ming Jeong
My Dad passed away on December 19, 2023. This is my first haiku dedicated to him.
If you are on Facebook, you know that each day, Facebook posts your memories. For 10 years, the same memories have come up, accumulating each year. So, this Saturday, June 22, a photo post from 2014 came up. It was a photo I took of Chinese Long Bean flowers. Grief struck me when I realized that my Dad planted those Chinese Long Beans, every year… and this will be the first year without him.
In my case, either one is appropriate
i didn’t see it before
but now i see my Dad everywhere
or
i didn’t want see it before
but now i see my Dad everywhere
Actually, I would like to keep it as:
i didn’t see it before
but now i see my Dad everywhere
Diana Ming Jeong
Retracting this one, which has a typo anyways…
i didn’t want see it before
but now i see my Dad everywhere
Diana, It sure was nice to learn about your Dad, thank you for sharing.
Thank you, Dan! :)
Here is another one.
it didn’t matter how old i was
Dad always kept everything i made for him
Diana Ming Jeong
A tender and beautiful haiku, Diana. What a lovely tribute these poems are. I love that your father planted Chinese long bean flowers every year.
Thank you Madeleine!
When cleaning out his things, I found some seeds in a bag labeled “long beans”. I didn’t keep them………..
I’m sure he is ok with that.
Bringing tears to my eyes, Diana I am sure he is. :)
Diana–thank you for sharing your thoughts about your dad. I hope there’s a verse yet to be written about Chinese Long Beans –or the lack thereof.
Thank you Patricia!
This is new to me… this grief. I didn’t know I would be able to write anything about my Dad. But I definitely will share more verses if they be about Chinese Long Beans or not. But the photo of those Chinese Long Bean flowers sure did open my eyes.
Side Show
the moon joins
a juggler’s side show
harvest festival
Wendy C. Bialek
a swirl of moths
orbits the yellow lamplight
Jonathan Alderfer
drifting leaves
pile up at the lock gates
on the old canal
Andrew Shimield
an inuksuk points the way
to the next adventure
Carol Jones
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
*****
i didn’t see it before
but now i see my Dad everywhere
Diana Ming Jeong
wishing there was
a lighthouse for lost souls
empty swings
seem so sad and silent
plastic poinsettias parked
on my tombstone
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
*
making one filmy veil
do the work of seven
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
‘
the Prophet proclaims: ‘love,
love, love is all you need.’
a pelican splashes down
in the tranquil sea
lovers in the back seat
where no man has gone before
:) :) nice one, Dan.
Thanks! The allusion was to Star Trek, popular 1966-69, the time frame during which the Apollo 8 mission took place.
the same prelude announces
Elvis in the house
I just discovered that in later years, Elvis concerts opened with this theme.
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
Ooops. Correction:
fluid notes segue to liquid
flowing water rhythms
good wishes to John for a swift recovery, and thanks to Jim for helping out.
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s Thus
spake Zarathustra’
– Lorin Ford
*
my teenage son
stays in bed till noon
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
*
awaiting developments
on the ever after
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s Thus
spake Zarathustra’
– Lorin Ford
a toast
to the young couple
we waltzed
in the moonlight
Or
arm in arm we waltz
through the midnight city
he bugged me
at first, first love
wherever we go
Kilroy was here
heh heh–love this one!
Thanks Laurie :)
Love this one, too Carol! :)
Thanks, madeleine :)
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
——-Lorin Ford
.
the torn and faded cover
of my old Whole Earth Catalog
.
traveling a line
that vanishes into black
.
a star-nosed mole
checks the night sky
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
in dulcet voice mother sings
freedom songs to her infant
strains of trumpets announce
the Lord’s second coming
the anthem ring of sirens
alerts the town to wildfires
fluid notes segue to fluid,
flowing water rhythms
the flow of flaming lava
engulfs houses and fields
whirling notes become a white
crane rising above marshland
So sorry to hear of your ongoing vision difficulties, John. My fervent hope is for you to have a stress free recovery in the weeks ahead.
Best regards,
Betty
an inuksuk points the way
to the next adventure – Carol Jones
–
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’ – Lorin Ford
–
because the world is round
It turns me on . . . – John and Paul
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
the artist composes work
that creats world peace
the chorus proclaims,
“Hallelujan, peace reigns.”
after carillon bells ring
smoke creeps up the valley
firefighters clear brush away
from the carillon tower
John, I sure do wish you a speedy recovery!
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’ – Lorin Ford
it’s always the favorite star
that vanishes without a trace
it’s amazing how far shadows stretch
when they’re waving goodbye
the artist grief
only sculpts a broken heart
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
composition on the theme
of restoring life to the land
balancing harmonies
with dramatic heat increase
a harmony of spheres
rescues man from certain death
the scale of change evolves
into new culture boundaries
the soprano sings joyful
praises blessing the new born
making a new paradise
from a two-part harmony
*
from their two-part harmony
one true paradise
*
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
the two lovers whirl
through life as one
a fanfare for genetic
life-saving intervention
swines hold the keys
to a paradise lost
(swines – informal)
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
*
having the Eremocene
all to ourselves
*
the old harmonies
dwindle to a monotone
*
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
*
the orcas out
to settle old scores
*
orcas showing us
two can play that game
*
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
*
keeping the secrets
in a second language
keeping all his secrets
in a second language
*
Good morning, Everyone–I have some encouraging news about John. He has had a second surgery on his eye. The doctor says John’s prognosis is good that he will regain his eyesight, but it will take time for him to recover. The estimate is seven weeks. So while John is healing, Jim Kacian has volunteered to do the renku posting for us each week. I know we are all much relieved about John’s situation and that we have a way to go to continue the renku in his absence.
Wishing you all good writing . . .
Patricia: many thanks for the update on John, and all our best wishes for a successful restoration of his eyesight.
And thanks also to Jim!
Thankyou for this positive update Patricia. Take care and be patient, John :)
Also, many thanks to Jim Kacien.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thanks, Patricia. Very glad to hear that John’s prognosis is good. Now he need to rest and let the healing process happen. My wish for him is comfort and music of his choice.
Many thanks to Jim, who has done and still does so much for world-wide haiku and related. His haiku, :
gunshot the length of the lake
continues to echo and resonate for me after all these years. Every time it occurs to me, I’m there.
Wonderful news! Thanks for the update. Best wishes to John.
Yay upon Yay, John!! Such wonderful news. Rest, recover and listen to the chorus of our best wishes. Thanks for sharing, Patricia.
So grateful to hear this news, Patricia!
Thank you for the Good News!🙏
i so appreciate your sharing this optimistic update about John’s second surgery, Patricia. This is such great news to hear.
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
——-Lorin Ford
staged for joys & passions
falling rice on newly-weds
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
— Lorin Ford
a toy monkey clapping
slower…and…slower
unfolding the map
from before the bypass
the philatelist
wets his lips
a broken funny bone
from the monkey bars
Ps: Be well, John!
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
— Lorin Ford
waiting to welcome back
her godmother
waiting to welcome back
the godmother
I love all the possibilities, Pamela! :)
Wonderful!
Just for fun, Pamela:
her shoe too large
Cinderella falls flat on her face
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
— Lorin Ford
the fanfare ending
also begins the hunt
a majorette cartwheels
with fire baton
in the background
twirling fire batons
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
*
the conductor’s second sense
about elopements
*
the conductor tells from
their grins they’re eloping
*
the simultaneous
translation so seamless
*
the near seamlessness of si-
multaneous translation
*
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
*
passing the baton
to a smaller generation
*
conducting themselves with dignity
no matter what
*
scrambling for a letter
of safe conduct
*
John, I pray for you and your family and your doctors helping you back to full sight. Lorin, incorporating Strauss’ tone poem to link to Carol’s verse is brilliant. Much gratitude to Jim and Dave for lending their gifts to us until John is well again. Patricia, you are the heart and spirit of these renku journeys. Thanks ever so.
`
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
`
Lorin Ford
`
temps rise to the level
of human inattention
`
anti scientists go
tilting at windmills
`
after aliens’ first visits
they rethink time travel
`
arms this wide apart
showing how much love
anniversary bed plus
two kids petting the dog
world of silence between
I do and never did
across all their years
still everything left to say
Oops!
`
temps rise to the level
of human inattention
`
Too similar to Lorin’s verse. So:
`
temps exceed levels
of human inattention
Oops!
`
Too similar to Lorin’s verse. So:
`
temps exceed levels
of human inattention
a mole lifts soil
during the graveside service
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
on Ringstrasse the sage’s
words soar to supreme heights
beautiful Eros evokes
troubles for Gods and mortals
the scales of passion enflame
romance between her and me
with science advancing, maybe soon
‘sight” cells transferred to the palms
may allow a blind man to read any flat
page in a book bypassing the need to
rely on braille. With this in mind i write
this verse:
with pin-pricked palms
a poet sees his words
(more research is needed, for those interested in learning more about
this, you may want to google D. O. P., Dermal Optical Perception, perception cells, etc.)
This is great! But if a person can still hear, then there are perhaps screen reading programs to output to audio. I believe these exist but I am not familiar with the program names or it escapes me right now. I’m sure that Google or Microsoft or Apple are on it? Calling all A.I. 🧐
Certainly these programs exist, Diana…..but i really like cuddling up to a book and writing poetry in bed….and taking into account exposure to certain lights directly after surgery can be harmful to eyes and possibly delay healing….
The other benefit…i find advantageous, with some of the promising techniques is that reading/and writing is not co-dependent on software updates, wires, electricity or any light source at all.
I’m praying for John and his family for the healing of his eye and for a speedy recovery. ❤️🩹🙏💐
Thank you again, Patricia, for choosing one of mine for the long list. And I also had to look up about the doll! I was born and raised in San Jose and I had no idea about the street names! I now live in Pasadena, Ca so those names are long ago but I do remember Reed!
Congratulations to Lorin! I was JUST listening to this before Bill Anders passed. Our music director was playing it for me and perhaps it did coincide with Bill Ander’s death and that is why he was playing it. This is a perfect tribute to Earthrise! It’s fantastic and genius.
My “brilliant blue eyes” haiku was a tribute to Earthwise (earth and reflection of earth on the glass) and also a nod to John for his eyes, for his eye to heal, so he can enjoy some chocolate cake or the cake of his choice. 🎂
Thanks, Diana. :-)
I suppose it’s all those oceans that Earth has, and perhaps also oxygen in the atmosphere, that makes blue the colour of Earth as seen from space. Without all that water, Earth”s colour would be like that of Mars.
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
——Lorin Ford
.
the eagle has landed
on top of the tallest pine
.
on my way to you
one small step at a time
.
lying about you lying about
how much you love me
.
we promise to speak only
in the present tense
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’ –Lorin Ford
*
even in the mock debate
he pleads the fifth
Clever, Wendy, love this verse.
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
may I have this dance
for the rest of life?
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
— Lorin Ford
pole vault competitors’
hug viewed worldwide
lightning strobe lights
his courtship dance
marzipan assorted fruit
on the picnic blanket
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
a phrophetic path
to enduring love
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
Ahura Mazda, prophet
of a virtuous life
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
*
young poets
deciphering cloud puppets
*
Vienna waits for
the third woman
*
in every plaza
a soapbox and a waltz
*
To clarify the linkage Nietzsche was the author of “Thus Spake Zarathrusta” in which he described poets as “makers of lies”. One example was how poets make up stories out of clouds.
Yes, Clysta, Nietzsche was the author of the novel, “Thus Spake Zarathrustra” . However, it was Strauss who, later, composed the “tone poem” with the same title.
Wikipedia has it: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Also_sprach_Zarathustra
“Also sprach Zarathustra, Op. 30 (German: [ˈalzo ʃpʁaːx t͡saʁaˈtʊstʁa] ⓘ, Thus Spoke Zarathustra or Thus Spake Zarathustra)[1] is a tone poem by Richard Strauss, composed in 1896 and inspired by Friedrich Nietzsche’s philosophical 1883–1885 novel Thus Spoke Zarathustra.[2] Strauss conducted its first performance on 27 November 1896 in Frankfurt. A typical performance lasts roughly thirty-three minutes.
The initial fanfare – titled “Sunrise” in the composer’s programme notes[3] – became well known after its use in Stanley Kubrick’s 1968 film 2001: A Space Odyssey.[4] ” + etc.
Strauss’s initial fanfare – titled “Sunrise” – is the source of the title of Anders’ photo, “Earthrise’ .
You are correct Lorin. I saw and heard 2001 ASO when it was released. I meant only to point out that my cloud verse linkage was to the earlier book. The same with my Richard and Johann Strauss loose linkage. I wonder if such connections are too loose for renku. My mind ranges vastly. 😉
“I am counting on help from Jim Kacian and Dave Russo until John recovers.” – Patricia
Many thanks to Jim and to Dave Russo, without whom we’d all be up the creek without a paddle.
so hot the lizards cool off
at the latest godzilla movie
Foremost – wishing John a steady recovery over time.
Lorin – your link is superb! Now what? I’ll ponder love, but in the meantime . . .
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
•
knick knack paddy whack
give the former president a fact
Thanks, Alison. :-) Happy you like it.
“Now what? I’ll ponder love…” -Alison Good idea, I think. Guess what they used to call the June full moon in old England, France & Germany (at least).
“But, what does honeymoon really mean?
https://www.dictionary.com/e/honeymoon/
Relevant to June in the Northern Hemisphere only, of course.
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
a glance that speaks volumes
words can never convey
without speech
our thoughts understood
how to translate from one
dead language to another
*
a love that
dare not
*
the hum of life
in a pair of held hands
*
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
looking back
at our years together
waking to the dulcet tones
of a cement grinder
John, you are too talented a poet and editor
to have your sight taken away, therefore you
will have a full recovery very soon so you can
read these words.
Sending my best wishes to John as he goes through this healing journey.
Thanks to those keeping this going and to Patricia for her wonderful explanations of the process.
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
–Lorin Ford
I wake every morning
at your side for twenty years
waking every morning
at your side for twenty years
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Four storm riders
quicken in the dawning
Humanity in Glory
Triumphant among stars
a star in the East
annonces the Ancient of Days
Firstly. all the very best for the recover of your vision, John. A truly beautiful verse about the moon and trees.
This is seen by so many but not appreciated . . .
An absolute stunner of a verse you have chosen, Patricia.
Congratulations and thankyou, Lorin for this exceptional link.
Thanks, Carol. :-)
So sorry about the setback, John! I join the stream of good thoughts heading your way.
Patricia and Lorin—wonderful work. This week is truly about banding together.
*
less and less that can’t be said
in polite company
*
what even counts for
polite company anymore
*
no unaccompanied dogs
or children allowed
*
hearing both sides
on the Anthropocene
*
hearing both sides
on the Anthropocene – Laurie Greer
Love this verse, Laurie, at some time we will be judged for the things we had or had not done and, maybe, by archeologists in the very very distant future, probably not of our world or mankind, but not as we know it today.
Thanks, Laurie. A bit of work-shopping can work wonders, sometimes. Patricia is the one who first saw the possibility of blending the gist of two verses, to make a much better verse.
Thanks, Laurie.
John, wishing you the best and speediest recovery! Beautiful ku on today’s ’Haiku of the Day.’
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
——-Lorin Ford
Congratulations Lorin! Your verse sent me in an unexpected direction.
On a whim I found these words in ‘Thus Spoke Zarathustra’ by Friedrich Nietzsche, and reformatted them into two lines. Too aphoristic for the haiku tradition, but I thought they might be of interest and perhaps present ideas relevant to our renku
those who hear not the music
think the dancers mad
I fear you close by;
I love you far away
where one can no longer love
there one should pass by
in the end one experiences
only oneself
Was that life?
Well then! Once more!
Whoops! Thanks, Jonathon.
But it looks like I confused Strauss’s music title with the title of Nietzsche’s novel. (where was my head? )
(I love the music . . . blame that on the Kubrick film, which is where I first heard it.) The title of that music should be ‘Also spake…’ not “Thus spake …”, which refers to the book.
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Also
spake Zarathustra’
.
or
Earthrise
in tune with Strauss’s ‘Also
spake Zarathustra’
.
I’ll put this up top where Patricia might notice it and perhaps we’ll see what Patricia thinks.
ah, no. It’s ok. I was getting confused. It should be “… Strauss’s thus…”, as is.
” … Thus Spake Zarathustra)[1] is a tone poem by Richard Strauss, composed in 1896 and inspired by Friedrich Nietzsche’s philosophical 1883–1885 novel Thus Spoke Zarathustra.[2] ”
That’s it, in English. “Also sprach Zarathustra” is the same but in German, I gather. Whew!
Whew indeed, that is confusing since the a German word “also” translates into English as “thus” and is not the same as the English word “also.” I believe Nietzsche’s book title and Strauss’s tone poem both have the same original title in German, “Also Sprach Zarathustra,” which is usually translated into English as “Thus Spoke (or Spake) Zarathustra.”
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
a grain of sand spirals
around the soupbowl
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
a spaced-out ex-hippie
smiles and says . . . good shit!
sweet date
quickly finds
all my cavities
Be well, John! I hope you recover quickly and completely from eye surgery. It’s nice having one of your poems selected today for The Haiku Foundation’s “Haiku of the Day.”
all those haiku
about the moon in the trees,
the moon in the trees
John Stevenson
Congratulations, Lorin, on providing a fine fifth verse! And, again, great guidance this week, Patricia. Here are a few sixth-verse candidates.
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
the zero-gravity toilet
a downer for stoners
the smell of burning weed
permeates the balcony
the kids making out
lose track of the plot
Thanks, Richard.
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
farewell dinner
with gypsy violins offstage
thoroughly completely
and inexorably confused
voiceprints might yet
lead to a conviction
the past looms large in
the not-too-distant future
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
This is a fascinating and intriguing verse
Lorin, a poetic and poignant scene
set to that timeless dramatic theme,
very well done.
Patricia a fine pick, thank you. Now the
possibilities forward are as endless as space.
Many thanks, Rob. :-)
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
a fine wine picked here
and sipped off alien’s lips
So glad that Lorin is amenable to this fabulous combination, of two fine offerings that Patricia mixed in her creative mind. I can enjoy the heightened experience resulting from the melding of these two worlds into one.
________________________________________________________________
Dictionary
Definitions from Oxford Languages · Learn more
meld1
/meld/
verb
gerund or present participle: melding
blend; combine. “Australia’s winemakers have melded modern science with traditional art”I
______________________________________________________________________
Earthrise
to the tune of Strauss’s ‘Thus
spake Zarathustra’
Lorin Ford
_______________________________________________________________________
Congrats to Lorin, Patricia, Bill Anders, Stanley Kubrick and Richard Georg Strauss
Thanks, Wendy. I, too, prefer the combination that Patricia arrived at best of all. :-)
(I’m sure we’re all awaiting news of John’s condition and hoping for the best outcome.)
Patricia, what a lovely surprise here at my old computer at 9:49am, AEST to find you’ve chosen my Anders + Kubrick verse to follow Carol’s verse. (Probably everyone in the Northern Hemisphere is asleep. For me, last night was the longest night of the year. The moon was full and golden.) I’m delighted. :-)
However you choose to have the verse is fine with me, with or without quotation marks, or combining the two verses.
I’m really happy you considered Strauss’s music in the background, too. Probably everyone is familiar with it, but just in case:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T1HdRwiANpE
Lorin–I’m so happy that you are pleased with this verse–out of the fertile mind of Lorin Ford!
I’m looking at that same moon tonight–at 11:29 on the coast of Monterey Bay.
Patricia
Many thanks, Patricia, and your inspiration to combine the elements of two verses was brilliant. It reminds me of happy days in the past working with the late John Carley. (Though those renku were done on a private website and could be quite funny and raucous in ways that wouldn’t be suitable for display on THF.)
Yes, same moon. :-) This from a radio station on New Zealand (it’s the first relevant moon news article I’ve found. There will be others, around the world)
https://www.rnz.co.nz/news/world/520244/everything-to-know-about-strawberry-moon-in-australia-coinciding-with-this-year-s-winter-solstice
So, for you, it was the ‘strawberry moon’, it seems :-) I don’t know if there are any names for the full moon at winter solstice here, but I can say that the Moon Rabbit was very clear and bright.
Lorin, Such an auspicious Solstice for your verse and for this Sideshow Renku this year. Your verses become heard perfectly with Patricia’s touch. I too watched that same moon rise last night over the Diablo Range in the Northern Hemisphere and felt that same delight. My thoughts are with John and my thanks to Patricia for considering two of my offerings. Off to our next adventure.
Thanks, Clysta, yes it’s the same moon that appears in both North and South Hemispheres, just not at the same time. When it’s my longest night & winter, it’s the longest summer day in the Northern Hemisphere. The moon orbits the Earth, both orbit the Sun.
It was a very cold evening and night here, but the moon was golden-rosy warm -looking.
Great verse, Lorin! I love that music (first came across it in the Kubrick film)
Thanks, Marion. Lovely to “see” you here. :-)
I’m pretty sure Kubrick’s film was where I heard it first, too. I had heard Strauss’s famous waltz, though, which also is on the film’s sound track.
With concern and best wishes for John. And thanks to Patricia for this wonderful adventure. In particular for sharing about Patty Reed and your personal connection! And congratulations to Lorin on your wonderful poetry.
Ander’s Earthrise
some years before Kubrick’s
great space odyssey
—Lorin Ford
someday without you
dog will fill the gap he said
leap-second debate
consensus couldn’t wait
bio-concocted
with sun and cholesterol
paddle board à deux
four feet connect with swells
inexpressible
relationship reckoning
praying — sit and rise
waking lullabies
Thanks, Pamela. :-)
And many thanks to Jim Kacian and Dave Russo for supporting the Renku pending John’s recovery.
“DITTO” for Pamela’s support for the helpers here and good wishes for John!
THRITTO for the above
I second that statement, Pamela. Many thanks.