The Renku Sessions: A Day of Snow 7
Greetings and welcome to The Haiku Foundation’s Fourth Renku Session: A Day of Snow. I am Marshall Hryciuk of Toronto Canada and i will be the leader of a 36-link Kasen renku. I’ve led over 40 of these linked-poem gatherings and my latest book, from Carleton Place, Canada is a selection of 15 of them, called petals in the dark.
Good morning, renku enthusiasts! I’ve chosen:
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
It gives a further twist to “granny’s specs” in that it is an apparition that not only makes one’s skin crawl (hairy), but gets inside our heads (its curse causes immediate death) and inside of our clothes and bodies (points / the bones) which I would “literalize” as “makes my bones curdle.”
Terrific transition out of the formal to the immediate and dramatic. Plus, that the monster is from Australian Aboriginal culture and the phrase for laying a curse, “points the bones” is part of the Australian-English vernacular expands our references to include a radically different continent and cultural platform than where we’ve been heretofore. Thank-you very much (as we say in Canada), Barbara.
What we need now is 2 lines, more of the phantastical-mythological-surrealiste to transport us from our imminent demise.
Happy linking,
Marshall
A Day of Snow to Date
a day of snow
no one else
has come to the door–Marshall Hrycuik
coyote song closer
this longest night–Judt Shrode
incense lit
the scent of sage
lingers in a crowd
–Maureen Virchau
bales of the second haying
stacked to the rafters–Paul MacNeil
dust from travelers
makes its slow descent
in the moonlight–steve smolak
faded jeans, school colors
and granny’s specs to match–Betty Shropshire
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
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the swift and true arrow
of the catalpa bow
*
the catalpa bow
swift and true
security footage
of a winged spirit
shapeshifting selkie
returns to her ocean home
ah, yin-yang shapeshifter from the Hebrides -would be a good icon for our renku -thanks, Judt
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
-Barbara A. Taylor
*
rubbing the lamp
for the genies third wish
-Steve Smolak
that would give it a Middle Eastern twist, steve -but, no I don’t want the predicament wished away
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
-Barbara A. Taylor
*
setting sail with Odysseus
as he opens a bag of wind
-Steve Smolak
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
-Barbara A. Taylor
*
the bottle uncorked
raises the spirits high
-Steve Smolak
there we are, steve, more happiness -seems inspired by Shrikaanth’s offering, but happily received nonetheless -and if we were going to have a ‘literary’ reference, one to a Homeric epic would be a great place to start
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
.
–Barbara A. Taylor
.
walking the plank to fall
right into ambrosia
.
-Shrikaanth Krishnamurthy
well this one, Shrikaanth, at least has some surrender to it with a happy result -thanks
Are you keeping this around for consideration Marshall?
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
.
–Barbara A. Taylor
.
a tumbling Ganga
presses reboot
.
– Shrikaanth Krishnamurthy
hello again, Shrikaanth -at first I thought ‘Ganga’ was the Hindustani for the Ganges River -but the second line seems to refer to a video program -somewhere I don’t want to go with this link
Actually Marshall
.
Ganga is indeed the Indian (Sanskrit) and the direct name for Ganges. This was not a computer program I was referring to. It was a mythological reference to how the Ganga was brought down from heaven (Lord Shiva’s matters locks, link to hair) to be earth to redeem the cursed ancestors of Bhagiratha (a reboot essentially 🙂
.
So it is a computer term; making it surreal as it is not a computer program
.
Hope that makes sense
.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bhagiratha
the creature from the black lagoon
pulls me from harm
and thus keeps our subject alive -one to think about, Paul, thanks
evanesco! shouted with a
thrust of the wand
.
.
Evanesco is the Vanishing Spell form Harry Potter 🙂
yeah, joel, that would work, except I want something that doesn’t reference a literary or musical work
Sweetums crooning
“That Old Black Magic” with Cher
–
–
– (1975)
Sweetums crooning
“That Old Black Magic”
that way, at least it becomes a romance -ah well, Judt
the dancing clown and alice
in a game of ring-a-rosy
or:
“ring around the rosy”
for those who chanted it that way.
Marietta -and this has been going on for awhile -i’m afraid we’re linking more closely with the previous offering than the previous verse in the renku
Hi Marshall. Well, my thinking was that if anything could see off a marauding bunyip and make it slink off in disgrace it would be the impossibility of trying to break into a childhood game it wasn’t invited to. I’ve missed the point and the boat with this one, obviously! Will persevere…
Bigfoot and Nessie
plotting a joint sighting
*
*
Bigfoot and Nessie
plot a joint sighting
couldn’t they just do a selfie together? or would that be bad for their followers? thanks, Judt
I think it’s time for a real blast!
*
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
*
a squadron of UFO
cloaked in the swamp gas
‘aliens to the rescue’ -i like it, Liz Ann – “cloaked” though, makes me think of Romulans, which is not good
*
a squadron of UFO
hovers among the swamp gas
*
a drum-roll of thunder heralds
centaurs waving cross-bows
well, Marietta, this is certainly original and has the unlikeliehood of “centaurs …” but the “drum-roll of thunder” reminds me of the US Calvalry arriving just as the savages are rounding the tents for the tenth time
Yes, you’re right of course, Marshall! Just too Lone Ranger for words…
making lovers lose each other
Puck turns and churns the butter
hi Judt -turned off all allusions at this point -Puck could have done worse, though
a quick poke in the eye
with my Sonic Screwdriver
be better, Marion as, ‘superSonic’
Ah, I forgot, Marshall – you probably haven’t heard of Doctor Who and his super duper accessory!
http://tardis.wikia.com/wiki/Sonic_screwdriver
a strongman tosses
the surrealist sofa
or, being more specific …
a strongman tosses
the Mae West Lips Sofa
yeah, Marion, i was wondering if Dracula, the Count had entered our ballroom -Mae West is far preferable
“the” surrealist sofa? Marion, is it a specific kind of sofa or will any juxtaposition do? Or as they say in the furniture business, “so fah, so good”
🙂
It’s Dali’s sofa, Marshall. I saw it (or perhaps it was another version) in the Dali museum in Amsterdam. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mae_West_Lips_Sofa
I leap onto the back
of the Count’s stallion
my genie hands me
a bottle of poteen
after “facing me” can’t really have “… hands me”, Marion
I call upon the power
of the giant frog
too close to ‘frog-power’, Marion
after drinking the potion
she shrinks and escapes
this is getting there, Marion, but it doesn’t have to be ‘the next frame in the story’ like a comic or a cartoon
Prospero conjures up
the tempest of his life
no, Marion, don’t want another frame of story -looking for something new
Shouldn’t it be ‘points the bone’ singular?
I’m curious why this repetition of the phantastical-mythological-surrealiste when avoiding repetition is the general rule (not counting moon, love, blossom verses).
In the actual indigenous law ritual, Chris, yes. I didn’t comment on that because I feel it’s best to leave this sleeping dog lie. Having the reference plural, along with a hairy bunyip wielding them, can scrape in as comical, just as we *might* find a whitey busker putting on blackface & singing ‘Mammy’ comical these days.
Anyway, I’ve been trying to focus on the comical aspect. 🙂
—
– Lorin
I liked, “points/the bones” better, Christopher because Barbara sent it to me that way and i responded first-hand as if it were curdling the subject’s bones as well as embodying a strong Australian-vernacular phrase. I asked Barbara if she would allow me to adjust the third line to read “points the bones” and as she didn’t respond, i believed she wanted it included exactly as she sent it, so i did that. Her way, (and our way, now) the emphasis is on the pointing; makes the point sharper and the bones an imminent heap. Which is, of course, a more literal reading of an ‘extra-literal’ phrase, something that’s my prerogative here
we avoid repeating actions and nouns, Christopher: ‘phantastical-mthological-surrealiste’ is a section -Just the seasonalities are sections. and as such, usually contains 2 or 3 links. The other two that are not seasonal in this renku will be ‘unrequited love’ (2 verses) and current events (2 verses). And yes we will be repeating each of the seasonality sections
once again, Frodo
slips on the ring
to slip on the One Ring
or not?
to slip on the One Ring
or not . . .
hi Christopher -no, I don’t want to move into this dilemma here
where the razors edge
meets the eyeball
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=wNoqYFO2sE4
https://m.youtube.com/watch?autoplay=1&v=dkcZp-ofXEE
a claassic surrealiste cut from a Bunuel film, i believe, Jennifer -by adding, ‘surrealiste’ to the description of this section, i didn’t mean we were meant to rehearse the history of the art movement, but that here, especially, and maybe only here, the juxtaposition of radically different images would be encouraged -as in the practice of artists being surrealistes
Marcel Marceau
mimes karaoke
and lost his lips in the sync -thanks for playing along, Jennifer
saved by pressing the
video game reset button
a too easy solution -as in ‘it was all a dream’, joel
a simple allakhazam
does the trick
and simply be too easy, Michael Henry
Captain Jack:
http://www.imaginequotes.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/Jack_Sparrow_Quote.jpg
—
Lorin
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
—
ah, quoth the barmaid,
it’s me Captain Jack Sparrow
—
-Lorin
whoops … repeating ‘me’ (though ‘my’ doesn’t suit the voice) revised to:
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
—
ah, quoth the barmaid,
it’s Captain Jack Sparrow
—
-Lorin
I guess this is meant as a joke, Lorin, since “quoth” evokes Edgar Allan Poe and the Captain’s name is “Sparrow”
Well, he’s hairy, he drinks & swaggers, look dangerous & points all sorts of things at people, but is sort of the good guy. 🙂 Not meant as a joke really…a comical & saving transformation is how I think of it. (I like the character, who survives unlikely situations)
. . . ‘quoth’ because it’s an archaic word that fits the timeless era of fantasy piracy & doesn’t need an explanation, and yes there’s Poe’s ‘The Raven’ who quoth ‘nevermore’ and Capt. Sparrow who always pops up again… last seen by me optimistically heading for the fountain of youth, in a rowboat, with (to say the least) a less than reliable map. 🙂
—
– Lorin
vine to vine
following Tarzan and Jane
sorry, Marilyn, don’t feel any link here
as chairs float past our old pine
getting taller bit by bit
chairs float past as our old pine
gets taller bit by bit
this from the perspective of a ‘Time lord’, i’d guess, Judt -as in you’d need to be one to observe a pine’s incremental growth
Not very successful! It is meant to be a flood and the water can be seen beginning to recede by revealing more of the tree 🙂
phasers full power dry up
the swamp and the spell
phasers, good -but still back to zero, p j
drained the swamp
and dried up the spell
hi p j -this sort of brings us back to zero for the 2 verses -i like the last one and want this one to lead somewhere from it
juggernauts breach the fence
of the OK Corral
actually, Wyatt Earp just stood his ground and shot all his bullets in the ‘OK Corral’ -“juggernauts” too heavy for me here
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
—
by the pricking of my thumbs
we’re nearing Roswell
—
– Lorin
no, we’re not in the ‘unrequited love’ section yet, Lorin
‘unrequited love’ ??? Sorry, this is over my head, Marshall.
– Lorin
rain over the Kalahari
almost reaching the ground
precipitation 🙁
damn!, and i brought my brand-new brolly to ward them off -too bad, Judt
a message on birch bark
cast into the sea
well, this would keep it going, but Mary, this could be anywhere
the map etched tusks
of Babar running free
no, we won’t be going to the cartoons for this verse, Mary
the sly piper leads the way
with note of an alder flute
ooops, not ‘note’ but ‘notes’!
the sly piper leads the way
with notes of an alder flute
don’t know, Mary, why he’d need to be “sly” if he’s willing to enter this fray -and wouldn’t it be “on an alder flute”
Yes, “on an alder flute” would be correct. As for “sly,” well, it just seemed right that he needed to be sly (as in the pied piper). I guess I missed the boat.
(Kerikeri means dig dig in Maori)
“transmorgrifies”? Aalix? -Kerikeri is also the first mission-city in northern new Zealand, (I use Wikipedia) but i believe you meant, ‘transmogrify’ a fairly ugly word by itself for suggesting a magical surprise
oops–we already have something closer
town of Kerikeri
transmorgrifies into Salem
the town of Kerikeri
moves closer to heaven
“Computer, erase
the holodeck program”
yeah, Christopher, that would do it -but not what i’m looking for
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
—
a lump in my
surrealistic pillow
— Lorin
keep the mind flowin’, Lorin -all fun if not usable
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
—
when the men on the chessboard
get up and tell you where to go…
—
– Grace Slick
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gMA9qvphpM
“and you just ate some kind of mushroom
and your mind is movin’ slow
go ask Alice . . . ” -I once had a friend who tried to argue that “feed your head” meant ‘read more’
anyway, not here, not now, Lorin -though Jefferson Airplane, Led Zepp and the Stones together would make for one monster rock concert
the wings of the dragon
singed by Will-o’-the Wisps
*
ah, Liz Ann, the solution from ‘fairy’ and not in any derogatory way -just that we can’t redefine the bunyip as a dragon within our link
I saw the dragon more in the rescuing role – not morphed into the bunyip. Oh well. I’ll try another.
with the Latvian Gambit
I cut off Sympathy for The Devil
-Patrick
wild juxtaposition of an opening chess game move with a Rolling Stone music album, Patrick -but, actually, it just gives our subject too much control
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
*
–Barbara A. Taylor
*
balls of moss
exit the quaking forest
I like this, Carmen as it maintains the mood while transferring unnatural energy through naturally occurring things -will look at this agin, thanks
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
—
all hell breaks loose
in Monsieur’s kitchen
—
– Lorin
prefer a spell to a colloquial phrase in this context, Lorin
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
—
up the creek
with the wrong horoscope
—
– Lorin
yeah, not under the right star, Lorin, as your ‘Sirius’ one would have it
Wicked cool, Barbara!
…
…
facing me
a hairy bunyip
points the bones
– Barbara A. Taylor
*
“Dammit, Jim, I’m a doctor
not a gambler!”
– Betty Shropshire
oops, sorry…
….
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
– Barbara A. Taylor
this is great, Betty, referencing ‘Star Trek’ through a supporting actor -i’ll keep this in mind for later, thanks
the evil curse ricochets
from my garlic-wolfbane mojo
like the “ricochet”t, Paul, but can’t specify “the evil curse” out of the preceeding verse
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
—
at the Greek’s man cave
a Spoodle named Cerberus
—
– Lorin
. . . or maybe just:
—
at the Greek’s man cave
his Spoodle
—
– Lorin
naw, Lorin, prefer sphinxes to Spoodles
sticks and stones may break my bones
but cannot pass my wolfbane
hi again Paul -trying to use a spell within the renku -very nice idea -just don’t believe this is the spell that would relieve the menace
making eye contact
with the man in the moon
hey, Jackson, it’s not a moon verse -the closest we got to this was the rabbit beating his rice
Madame Pele
moving aside clouds of aa
hello again, Todd -pretty close to the previous -though ‘Pele’ is a Hawaiian goddess who needs to move away the fangs of the bunyip
atop Mauna Loa
the doorstep to heaven
hi Todd -the volcano in the Hawaiian islands as in an ascent of the soul to heaven? not so sure of our subject’s state of grace -or if the volcano might not be active -second line also brings back the famous Led Zeppelin song
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
—
under Sirius
a sphinx unsheaths her claws
—
– Lorin
this is possible to use, Lorin -under darkness lit by the ‘Dog-star’ an unnatural being reveals her power -thanks
Pegasus hitched
to the nearest star
I think, Michael Henry, that we need Pegasus charging in to the rescue
he discovers his wand
requires batteries
this is humourous, Marion, but probably still leaves us with a blood-drained corpse
🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂
praying that the carpet
is really magic
not enough detail or appeal to the senses here, Marion
and here’s me thinking
it was just a caterpillar
“here’s me” too close to “facing me”, from the previous verse, Marion
Prospero conjures up
another storm
yes, Marion i’m thinking along these lines -but “another storm” seems rather ‘ho-hum’ for such a momentous occasion
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
.
.
a tantrum on top
of Mt. Olympus
hi Polona -I like your ‘Dorian Grey’ one much better though there’s nothing ‘wrong’ with this
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
—
this heirloom scrimshaw set
to the highest bidder
—
– Lorin
introduces a mercenary aspect to the proceedings -I like some of your others better, Lorin
Awesome verse Barbara. Love it!
.
running but going nowhere as
the roc seizes its prey
.
or perhaps
.
running but going nowhere as
the raptor seizes its prey
naw, joel, this has some action -but it is a parallel one to the situation in the previous verse
extracting the fat of incantation
the shaman turns his back
-Patrick
first line, Patrick is too long and makes the action feel laborious and that our subject would be a corpse if the shaman took this long
G’day Marshall,
Thank you for selecting my verse, and thank you to those others
who have voiced their favour. Am interested to see how this
renku progresses.
Peace and Love
B
you are welcome, Barbara -and thanks for the well wishes
love the bunyip!
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
—
Kerouac’s cat
made to take the rap
—
Lorin
first line has a ring to it, Lorin -I still haven’t accepted that our subject from verse 7 is now a corpse
a murdered pharaoh’s crypt
keeps some wheat grains still alive
that’s a thought, Vasile, but it doesn’t really link with the previous verse
polishing the boss
of my linden shield
back to the New Stone Age, Claire -don’t thinkwe’d have the time for this in our renku
deus ex
transporter beam
hi again, Christopher -as in ‘beam me up, Scotty’? -seems a little facile in the face of the bunyip -and the “facing me” was a borderline kireji -the “deux ex” is a full one -but let them fly; we need more offerings
Whereas I would argue that “deus ex transporter beam” is one phrase, and that the expediency of deus ex machina rescues is the point ; )
deep in the wildwood
a puffball explodes
nice pattern of ‘p’ and ‘d’ sounds here, Claire -a possibility of relief, by diversion at least, but i feel i’m looking for something more direct here
the Chariot upright
out of the Tarot deck
might be able to work with the magic of this one, Agnes -will look at it again, later, thanks
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
*
–Barbara A. Taylor
*
their butler interrupts saying,
“One lump or two?”
another good laugh, Carmen, but i don’t want to escape the bunyip with a joke
faded jeans, school colors
and granny’s specs to match
.
–Betty Shropshire
.
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
.
–Barbara A. Taylor
.
a little Dutch boy
with his finger in the dyke
.
-Karen Cesar
Or ( better, I think) :
faded jeans, school colors
and granny’s specs to match
.
–Betty Shropshire
.
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
.
–Barbara A. Taylor
.
a cramp in the finger
of The Little Dutch Boy
.
– Karen Cesar
funny enough, Karen, just not prepared for humour here
two scarab beetles fighting
in my frying pan
I realize, Cristina, that “scarab” brings some sacristy to the battle here, but i don’t want to minimize the magnitude of the “points the bones” of the previous link in any way
coin operated Hydra
in the reflecting pool
sort of makes me think, Judt, of the Kosinski character who believes he can adjust reality with a tv channel converter
the bearded lady
with a Brazilian
Nut? -I think they call this a juxtaposition -could be great, but not here
Musashi recites
from his book of five rings
hi again, Michael Henry -so Musashi is an Anime samurai lord -really don’t want to go into ‘graphic novels’ for a reference here (though some of you may think i’ve turned it into one already with the last link) and it is the name of a sctual Japanese Samurai used in the Anime series like ‘Leonardo, Donatello etc.’ are used in teenage ninja mutant turtles
Musashi was an actual person in Japanese history. He has a legendary reputation as a loner, a martial-arts genius, a top nautch ink drawing artist, and last but not least the author of The Book of Five Rings.
Thank You Carmen couldn’t have said it better meself
my father bequeted me
his dream to carry it away
nice link, under the condition of death, Vasile. I take it you meant, ‘bequested’ or ‘bequeathed’ as in a verbal willing. I’ll look at this one again, later, thanks
Thank you Mr. Marshall.
whiskey in the hollow
of a shillelagh
hi again, Maureen -so this is an Irish-associated cudgel -so, ultimately a weapon -works as one left behind in this state -but -and this may seem really precious to some – “bunyip” is already a word from another language ‘imported’ into English -so that requirement is fulfilled -what we still need is an altogether ‘non-English’ word (with explanation) and an arcane or nearly obsolete word of ‘English’ origin (possibly with explanation). We did also include our ‘vernacular phrase’ in the last verse with, “points /the bones”
Well, Marshall, for what it’s worth (nothing, I know) I think Maureen’s verse is apt & clever in response to Barbara’s. An Irishwoman writes a verse combining references from Australian Koori culture and a North American woman writes a verse combining references from Irish culture.
—
Many English-language words are imported from other languages, some more recently than others . . . ‘coyote’ is certainly such a loanword, previously used in one of the verses here in this renku. Can we really designate ‘shillelagh’ as a ‘foreign’ word when it’s even in the North American dictionary, the Merriam-Webster?
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/shillelagh
—
‘With a Shillelagh under Me Arm’ – Bing Crosby:
http://www.metrolyrics.com/with-my-shillelagh-under-my-arm-lyrics-bing-crosby.html
—
“just sayin’ “, as the Nth. American expression goes.
–
– Lorin
Thank you for your kind words about my verse, Lorin.
the Wicked Queen’s mirror
telling lies
well Carol, after the moonlight, “granny’s specs” and “facing me” another reflective surface won’t do
Sasquatch
serving Billy Tea
Sasquatch
serving billy tea
another Australian reference -once in, get out with the next one and keep writing, Judt
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
—
Ned Kelly’s gang
also cross-dressing
—
ok, I know this doesn’t have a chance because it ‘returns’ to Betty’s verse, but I felt like posting it.
-Lorin
yeah, and it also repeats the Australian reference, Lorin
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
—
Well, it certainly fulfills the requirement of fantasy combined with the surreal. To be candid, I didn’t think this verse had a chance because of the ‘ex-communication’ from culture & subsequent death factor (given in ‘pointing the bone’) so early in the renku.
—
Though I’ve had a couple of my ‘bunyip’ haiku published, as a born Australian familiar with Koori culture from childhood, I would *never* combine the bunyip (a ‘water monster’) with ‘pointing the bone’, which is men’s business and to me, off-limits, and especially as a frivolous, disrespectful joke combined with the bunyip.
—
Congratulations on having it selected, though, Barbara. I guess the legendary Irish luck was in play and I understand that in renku, perception/ interpretation is all in the mind of the sabaki.
—
. . . and we Australians also say “thank you very much”, Marshall, when the occasion calls for it.
—
– Lorin
Interesting choice and a surprise to me too, Lorin, given the deep cultural significance of traditional ‘pointing the bone’ by the Kurdaitcha, that these allusions have been put together.
However, it is certainly a unique and surreal combo and congrats go to Barbara for the successful verse.
hi Lorin -I immediately jumped at the phrase, “men’s business” and then realized you meant by it that ‘point the bones’ is seriously preserved for human usage in ‘real’ situations. It would have been even better if we knew the monster was female, but we don’t; still, it’s important to consider that i chose this verse precisely because it is “ex-communicated” from culture.
I think it was Michael Fessler who quoted one of my haiku as an example of haiku in ‘brute nature’ -and this is where i try to write from in my own work. So when i lead a renku -granted a very ‘cultural’ activity -i try to ‘ground’ it in as severe a nature, an imaginative subjectivity and a beautiful diction as I can. So, though i wasn’t attempting, nor do i think Barbara was, to offend or shake up anyone’s cultural sensitivities with this verse, i do think that anything that can be performed or imagined may be allowed to enter our renku in verse
Marshall, “men’s business” is simply traditional business exclusive to men; “women’s business” is traditional business exclusive to women. Both include ‘religious’ duties, traditional stories and law.
The closest thing to the Australian indigenous ‘pointing the bone’ in Nth. American culture I can think of is the traditional Amish practice of shunning, except more extreme. You’re dead as far as everyone else is concerned from the moment of the ritual, and treated as such. Imagine this in a desert culture.
—
– Lorin
the grim reaper
trapped in a maze
interesting, Marilyn, that the second line could be ‘trapped in the maize’ -humans had to come to terms a very long time ago that we live by killing -but more to your offering; i’d like to know how the trap got there
dead on the shortlist
of another world
-Patrick
yeah, well this ku of yours just about sums up how I feel, Patrick. 🙂
– Lorin
deadpan and sardonic, Patrick, thanks
with majestic wingbeats
the dragon departs
Author’s Notes:
The Rainbow Serpent has been identified with the bunyip, a fearful, water-hole dwelling creature in Australian mythology
And there is believed to be links between the myths of the Australian rainbow serpent and the Chinese dragon
“The Rainbow Serpent has been identified with the bunyip. . . “- Sue
—
Only in relation to the designated waterhole/waterfall/river habitat, Sue. The Rainbow Serpent is one of the Dreaming “creator/ creatrix” beings. The Bunyip is a nighttime predator bogeyman-type creature.
– Lorin
Lori-
Thanks for clarifying the relationship/link between the two mythical creatures. I just copied what I read on the internet about Australian mythological creatures
-Sue
Lorin-
Sorry. Just saw my misspelling of your name.
-Sue
hi Sue -yeah, this is too close -we want to avoid, more than anything else, reading like a narrative -for instance, I never ‘do’ the season’s in sequence -also explains why this last was such a ‘hard’ shift -so, nothing continuous from link to link
terrific verse!
.
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
–Barbara A. Taylor
.
***
Dorian Gray
crashes the party
this is great, Polona -will keep this one around, thanks
wooden skulls dance full of life
for our death and rebirth
this is much more to the point, Vasile -but it makes me think of ‘All Soul’s Night’ which is in the fall
near the icon of Virgin Mary
an urn with my mother ash
hi Vasile -this reads like an attempted exorcism -but there’s no action here
Congrats, Barbara! A fascinating and chilling verse. Fantastic choice, Marshall.
*
blackthorn whittled
into a magic wand
this is good, Maureen, thanks -i’ll look at it again later
faded jeans, school colors
and granny’s specs to match
.
–Betty Shropshire
.
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
.
–Barbara A. Taylor
.
we stalk the Wild Things
with Maurice Sendak
.
-Karen Cesar
puts nice frame on it, Karen, too soon after i just ripped the frame of what was expected in this renku right off
faded jeans, school colors
and granny’s specs to match
.
–Betty Shropshire
.
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
.
–Barbara A. Taylor
.
” Welcome to
the Hotel California ”
.
-Karen Cesar
.
I would have put the quote in italics had the format allowed. ??
hi Karen -yeah, “you can check out but you can never leave” -more often a name around here for acid to be dropped than the Eagles’ song -but fun, nonetheless
fire and brimstone fill
the next several chapters
and I don’t even have a pulpit -but no way to predict the “next several chapters” Michael Henry
Fair dinkum high drama, Barbara! (I’m a Yank…not certain of the usage…:-) )
Nice verse, Barbara. ?
***
.
faded jeans, school colors
and granny’s specs to match
.
–Betty Shropshire
.
facing me
a hairy bunyip points
the bones
.
–Barbara A. Taylor
.
“Pay no attention
to the man behind the curtain!”
.
– Karen Cesar
though we’re a long way from the ‘yellow brick road’, Karen, this is fun too
pink elephants head up
the search and rescue
hello, Michael Henry -well, one way to link is to throw in the towel -makes the previous totally subjective is possible, thanks