Renku Sessions

The Renku Sessions: 12 Tones – Musical Chairs, Week 5

renku_300

Welcome to THF’s Renku Sessions. I’m Lorin Ford, acting as sabaki/ guide for this renku.

*****

The 4th verse: moving on

 

Musical Chairs – a Junicho Renku

 

musical chairs
a handful
of hot chestnuts

– Keith Evetts

 

the one left standing
chats up the scarecrow

– Clysta

 

a road sign
points in the direction
of the Monument

– John Daleiden

 

are we
there yet?

– Curt Linderman

 

Curt Linderman’s four-word, ‘sketch from life’ verse is both unexpected and delightful. Though there were several good contenders, I found myself coming back to Curt’s verse over and over. The juxtaposition of the plaintive whines and whinges of tired, small children against the aura of grandeur associated with ‘the Monument’ feels just right for this position in our renku. It carries its own humour.

Many of us, when driving long distances with children, will have experienced the whining from the back seat, typically repeated and repeated: “Are we there yet?” ‘There’ might be anywhere the family is heading towards: a famous monument, an important event, the home of cousins in another state, the promised beach . . .  It doesn’t matter where ‘there’ might be: all that matters to the kids is that they’re tired of waiting to be there. It seems to them that the journey could take forever. That pathetic whine, “Are we there yet?”, repeated, can drive adults crazy.

I also appreciate the layout of this verse, with ‘there’ at the beginning of line two capturing the emphasis in a natural way.

—

Our fifth verse will be a 3-line verse (without a cut) on the topic of the winter moon, which will fit well, I imagine, with the current season for most in the Northern hemisphere. Your verses should link to Curt Linderman’s verse but avoid reference to monuments of any kind. Also, avoid flowers or blossoms in this verse. There will be a place for flowers/blossoms later on in this renku.

Our kiyose (Japanese dictionary of seasonal words) will come into play again, this time in the winter section. http://www.2hweb.net/haikai/renku/500ESWd.html#WINTER

Happy wintering!

 

The submission deadlines will be Sundays, midnight eastern US time.

 

 

 

 

The Haiku Foundation reminds you that participation in our offerings assumes respectful and appropriate behavior from all parties. Please see our Code of Conduct policy: https://thehaikufoundation.org/about-thf/policies/#code-of-conduct

John Stevenson

Comments (187)

    1. Hello, Kathleen, welcome to the Renku session.
      You can post as many verses as you’d like to. Our sabaki/leader, Lorin, will choose just the one from the verses we enter.
      Thursday, Lorin will post the one most suitable for the link. Once again, read her requirements for the next verse, and off we go, post away, Kathleen, have fun.

      Carol

  2. are we
    there yet?

    Curt Linderman

    a straw hat
    replacing the fleece
    tipped to the snow

    Joanna Ashwell

    1. Yes, goodnight & good luck for you lot and qa not so good afternoon on a ridiculously hot Monday afternoon for me. I’m hosing myself down every 15 minutes or so.

      1. Thanks, Lorin…I’m sorry to hear how hot it is over there. Hope it cools down for you, soon…Good luck to all, too! It’s been fun :)

  6. are we
    there yet?

    curt linderman

    slowly forming ice
    stills
    a cold crescent moon

    climbing bonfire
    licks the cold belly
    of a laughing moon

    under a sinking moon
    bundled fishermen
    shuck four hundred oysters

  10. are we
    there yet? –Curt Linnderman

    in winter moonlight
    Santa’s sleigh flies
    from roof to roof

    winter moon
    lights our walk to Gramma’s house
    on Christmas Eve

    in winter moonlight
    Santa arrives with a pack
    of gifts for all

  11. new year moon
    glittering in the snow
    of the polders

    two bear cubs
    sliding down the ice
    in moonlight

    a kitten bats
    the winter moon
    in the window

    the moonrise
    over a snowy field
    grants a moment’s peace

  13. underfoot
    frost sparkles
    in the moonlight

    breath visible
    our way lit by
    the winter moon

    admiring
    the moon
    we see a shooting star

    a moonbeam
    on the duvet
    letting the kids rest

    the last
    supermoon sheds light
    on the map

    winter trees
    silhouetted
    by the moon

    moon rise
    downing pints
    at the pub

    reading about
    the moon landings
    by the fire

    the inn keeper’s
    face
    pale as the moon

    the man in the moon
    watches as we rub
    our aching feet

    the moon reflects
    in the outhouse
    window

    over dinner
    light dances in her
    crescent moon earrings

    bed bugs
    scurry away from a
    sliver of moonlight

    mooning over
    his ex she walks off
    into the night

    under a full moon
    they run
    to the diner

    along the path
    silver birch
    reflect the moon’s rays

    ancient holloway
    the only light
    from the winter moon

    shadows dance
    on the stone circle
    beneath the winter moon

    the cold moon
    ripples
    in her coffee

    in the rear view
    she catches a glimpse
    of the winter moon

    wassailing
    the trees
    below an indifferent moon

    in the
    icicles
    multiple moons

    1. There are 21 or 22 verses here, Melissa! Well, at least you’ve been kind enough to put them together in the one post.

  14. Don’t know if I’m a bit late with this one –

    winter’s moon
    leaves behind
    a twilight glow

    the winter moon
    goes beyond
    a castle’s walls

    1. No, Carol, you’re not too late. I’m following John Stevenson’s call to keep entries open until 12 midnight US EST: “The submission deadlines will be Sundays, midnight eastern US time.”
      Right now in US EST it’s:

      3:45 pm
      Sunday, 15 December 2024 (GMT-5)
      Time in Washington, DC, USA

      Submissions are open for several hours, yet.

  16. not the first
    to be born
    under a winter moon

    phallic-shaped rockets
    closer and closer
    to the winter moon

  17. are we
    there yet

    winter stories
    by the silvery light
    of the moon

    by winter moonlight
    the White Witch offers him
    Turkish Delight

    oblivious
    to the winter moon, our children
    snug as bugs

    the winter moon
    snagged
    by a blackthorn

  19. A short, but sweet verse from Curt…

    are we
    there yet

    how softly
    the winter moon comes to rest
    on their little beds

    silhouetted against
    the winter moon
    Santa in his sleigh

    by winter moonlight
    faces at the window
    look out for reindeer

    the frozen fountain
    in the midnight garden
    found by moonlight

  21. above the ski lift
    a winter day moon
    appears to melt

    *

    draft dodgers
    propped against doors
    can’t stop the cold moon

  22. are we
    there yet? –Curt Linnderman

    at a church garden
    the Virgin Mary statue
    in winter moonlight

    cat lies down
    in the winter moonlight patch
    cast through windows

  23. are we
    there yet?——Curt Linderman

    the ice fisherman’s hook
    pierces the limb
    of a winter moonglade

  24. Ah, John, this is a well-done verse but your “road” very clearly leads back to the last-but-one verse:

    a road sign
    points in the direction
    of the Monument (– John Daleiden)

    Call it kannonbiraki or call it reversion, it’s taboo. It doesn’t matter that it’s specifically an ice road : it’s still a road.

    1. Sorry, John (Hawkhead) I thought I was replying to your post at the bottom of this long page.page:

      walking the ice road
      under the quicksilver light
      of the winter moon

    1. repost with correction:

      are we
      there yet?——Curt Linderman

      an icy moonglade
      floats above
      the sunken ship

      1. Lorin,
        and i too…learn so much from you as well as all the contributor’s here.
        enjoy it….and keep c o o l!

  26. are we
    there yet?…….Curt Linderman

    just over my shoulder
    this Xmas drone
    mistaken for the cold moon

    1. are we
      there yet?…….Curt Linderman

      this Xmas drone
      over my shoulder
      mistook for the cold moon

  27. winter’s moon
    trailing gold
    over the silver sea
    …
    only the winter moon
    sees what’s in
    the empty room
    …
    winter moon’s
    a golden coin
    lying on a silver pond

    1. But, Melissa, the topic is the winter moon and there is no sign of any moon in your verse (above).
      Do post a new verse, starring the winter moon.

  32. oak moon
    the squirrel
    makes eye contact

    It’s getting colder around here… I saw a squirrel scurrying past my window yesterday.

    1. Madeleine, have you noticed that both of your verses here have a cut between Line 1 and line 2?

      last snow fight
      children leaving
      the winter moon

      oak moon
      the squirrel
      makes eye contact

      (The hokku is the only verse that has a cut.)

      1. Thanks, Lorin…just saw your note :)

        This is what I have so far:

        children leaving
        winter moon
        after the snow fight

        beneath
        the oak moon
        the squirrel makes eye contact

        the squirrel
        and oak moon
        making eye contact

  33. are we
    there yet?
    Curt Linderman
    *
    the cold moon joins us
    in the countdown
    to Christmas
    *
    only the cold moon
    follows up
    with Laica
    *

  35. unseen junk
    collecting in the craters
    of the winter moon

    moonrise
    above the powdered snows of
    Popocatépetl

    a condor glides
    across the snow-capped mountains
    to the moon

    the wolf moon
    howls inside
    a hopeless drunk

    or, if wolf moon is ruled out, then:

    the cold moon
    howls inside
    a hopeless drunk

    1. ‘Wolf Moon’ is not ruled out, Harrison. . But, hey, we haven’t had Christmas, yet!
      (And there is no such thing as a hopeless drunk. Believe me, I am a publican’s daughter and know a thing or two,)

  37. are we
    there yet?

    – Curt Linderman
    ••

    today
    cleaning the house
    my husband calm as the cold moon

    ••

    children
    improving their footprints on the carpet
    quiet as the cold moon
    •••

    as quiet as the cold moon
    he returned home
    and slept

  38. are we
    there yet?

    – Curt Linderman
    *
    migrants
    never at home
    under the cold moon
    *
    a family of migrants
    forever estranged
    by the cold moon
    *
    a family of migrants
    forever estranged
    under a cold moon
    *
    the winter moon
    becomes a home
    away from home
    *

  39. are we
    there yet? –Curt Linnderman

    at the mountain ranch
    winter moonlight glistens
    on new snow

  40. are we
    there yet? ——Curt Linderman

    bundled up
    the winter moon takes
    awhile to arrive

    winter moon
    takes
    awhile

    winter moon
    running a little
    behind

    winter moon
    a little
    behind

    winter
    moon
    delay

    winter moon
    tangled up
    in branches

    winter moon
    hung up
    behind mountain peak

    cold moon
    caught peeking
    through curtain opening

  41. are we
    there yet?

    – Curt Linderman
    *
    wild ducks paddle sideways
    to keep the winter moon
    within sight
    *
    the giggle of wild ducks
    as the winter moon
    tickles their feet
    *

  42. are we
    there yet?

    – Curt Linderman

    Epiphany moon
    through the pines
    gold and spices

    Epiphany moon
    through the pines
    with gold and spices

  43. are we
    there yet?

    – Curt Linderman

    the dim
    and silent light
    of a cold moon

    no tears
    of reply from
    a cold moon

    the cold moon
    a shiny monocle
    in darkness

    the cold moon
    a coin flipped toward
    the stars

    in shocked
    speechlessness
    the cold moon

  46. re we
    there yet?

    – Curt Linderman
    *
    a sip of cold water
    from the winter moon
    hits the spot
    *

  47. are we
    there yet?
    — Curt Linderman

    a moonless night
    placing a star
    for all to see

    Joanna Ashwell

  48. are we
    there yet?

    – Curt Linderman
    *
    a Christmas pageant
    followed closely
    by the cold moon
    *
    the cold moon
    takes its place
    in the Christmas pageant
    *
    the winter moon
    tops the stars
    in the Christmas pageant
    *
    the winter moon
    rivals the stars
    of the Christmas pageant
    *

  49. are we
    there yet?

    – Curt Linderman
    *
    the cold moon
    spreads its welcome mat
    for the long winter night
    *
    the cold moon’s drone
    makes for a long
    winter night
    *
    the moon’s long drone
    on a cold
    winter night
    *
    settling in
    with the moon
    for a long winter’s nap
    *

    1. Carol, this one seems to need an article before “winter…” but of course that would overload the verse with 3 articles. Perhaps the possessive :

      winter’s moon
      soothes the miasma
      of the mind

      ?

      1. Thanks for the revision, Lorin. I’ve been told about the lack of using articles, when on haiku courses.
        I like the way you have written the first line and will keep this in err, my mind.

        Thanks again :)

  54. are we
    there yet?

    – Curt Linderman

    children holding
    their shamash high
    in the moonlight

    families cross
    the prairie under
    a winter moon

    moonlit snow
    on carolers walking
    house to house

    with a loud voice
    the littlest Wise Man
    on a moonlit stage

    on a moonlit night
    through the woods
    to grandma’s

    1. ah, John – excellent verse but we’re not up to love verses yet. Not even up to “hint of love” verses, which is a pity, because this would be an ideal introduction to love verses in any renku.. Stay tuned though, because there will be love verses . Just not yet, and not in winter.

  57. are we
    there yet?

    – Curt Linderman

    winter
    day moon
    (is) almost there

    winter day
    moon
    almost there

    winter
    day moon
    almost there

    the winter
    day moon
    is almost there

  58. REPLACING:
    because i made the uchikoshi mistake and broke renku rules;
    please remove from consideration for verse five
    these unfortunately, unfit candidates and replace them with the replacing verses:

    the drone
    of back tires
    silences a snow moon

    replace this with:

    the drone
    of the snow blower
    silenced by a cold moon

    *
    the tug fit
    of snow tire chains
    on an SUV

    replaced by:

    the tug
    of a snow moon luring
    my face to look back

    *

    the snow moon
    and forgotten chains
    for the back tires

    replaced by:

    i put on ear muffs
    in the sight
    of a snow moon

    *
    the drone
    of back tires spinning
    deep into snow

    replaced by:

    the drone of breaking news
    silenced by the glow
    of a winter moon

    *

    the sleepy silence
    of a snow
    covered village

    replaced by:

    the sleepy silence
    of a village
    lit by a cold moon

    or

    the sleepy silence
    of a village
    lit by a winter moon

    *

    the buzz
    of chain saws
    on frozen branches

    replaced by:

    the buzz
    of evening news
    outshined by cold moon

    *
    the tug fit
    of snow tire chains
    on a SUV

    replaced by:

    last year’s lost mittens
    found in the light
    of the cold moon

    *

  59. Congratulations Curt!!! Thank you Lorin! I look forward to this each week!

    are we
    there yet?

    Curt Linderman

    finding solace
    in the winter mountains
    with King Moonracer

    Diana Ming Jeong

    2. Ah, Diana, it’s a nice verse but King Moonracer is not the moon. The verse for this spot is to be a moon verse, that means the actual moon (Earth’s actual moon)

      Do try again, but ensure your moon verses allude to Earth’s actual moon, in winter.

      1. Thank you, Lorin! I’ll try again.

        love shines
        in the winter
        moon

        love finds love
        under the winter
        moon

        winter moon
        matching toys
        to children

        racing
        the winter moon
        children and toys

        Diana Ming Jeong

  60. Thank you Curt and Lorin for such a lovely link. Wonderful that we are writing from the winter season!

    are we
    there yet?
    – Curt Linderman

    to town
    under a jolly moon
    in a one horse open sleigh

    viewing santa
    and his reindeer
    under the soft white moon

    santa and elves
    finish up
    under a winter moon

    santa
    and his elves wait
    for their whispered wishes

    on a sleigh ride
    to see santa and the elves
    through the misty moon

      1. Interesting question, Madeleine. I don’t think “one horse open sleighs” are necessarily out of the question. That’s because sleighs aren’t motor vehicles and they’re probably on sleigh runs or in fun parks rather than on any road. Or flying over rooftops and dropping gifts down chimneys.
        Ah,but chimneys are less and less, this century, aren’t they.

  61. are we
    there yet?
    — Curt Linderman

    my grandson asks
    ‘is Grammie there
    on this winter moon?’

    2. my grandson asks
      is Grammie on
      the winter moon?

      my grandson asks me
      is the winter moon warm enough
      for Grammie?

      1. My son-in-law’s mother was Grammie. I became Grandma. My grandsons were little itty bits when their precious Grammie died.

        1. I suppose each verse could be changed:

          grandson asked
          is the winter moon warm enough
          for Grammie?

          1. grandson asks
            is the winter moon warm enough for Grammie?

            grandson asks
            “is the winter moon warm enough for Grammie?”

          2. oops.
            sorry for mistakes. meant to be 3 lines and present tense. no idea if better with or without quotes.

            grandson asks
            is winter moon warm enough
            for Grammie?

            grandson asks
            is Grammie there
            on this winter moon?

  65. are we

    there yet?——– Curt Linderman

    even the cold moon
    can be seen
    wearing ear muffs

    1. are we
      there yet?

      – Curt Linderman

      withering wind
      making way
      for the moon

      withering wind
      clearing the way
      for the moon

      the North wind
      unearths
      a snowed-in moon

    2. winter fly
      round and round the moon
      in a teacup
      – Orence

      I like this, Orence. It may not be going back or forward, but it does have a certain monotony of a journey that an adult or child wants to end.

  68. are we

    there yet?——– Curt Linderman

    even
    the winter moon
    wears ear muffs

    even
    the cold moon
    wears ear muffs

  69. are we

    there yet?——– Curt Linderman

    the silent anticipation
    of a bedbug on a
    moonless night

    1. and another version:

      are we

      there yet?——– Curt Linderman

      the silent anticipation
      of a bedbug bite
      on a moonless evening

  70. are we

    there yet?——– Curt Linderman

    the drone
    of back tires
    silences a snow moon

    the sleepy silence
    of a snow moon
    covered village

    the buzz
    of chain saws between
    moonlit branches

    the tug fit
    of tire chains
    on a moonlit SUV

    1. Just a hint ( to you here, Wendy, but really to ALL. ) The direction of a renku is always forward, so always look back to the last-but-one to check that your current verse doesn’t refer to the last-but-one verse. (The terms uchikoshi and kannonbiraki refer to the dreaded ‘return to the last-but-one’ verse. )
      We have a road sign in verse 3. Anything associated closely to roads in verse 4 is fine, that’s a link. But anything associated with roads in verse 5 (this current verse) is uchikoshi. So tyre chains, SUVs,
      back tyres … & limousines, busses, motor bikes , windscreen wipers etc. are out.

      1. Oh right! Thanks for pointing this out to me, Lorin.

        Curious and may be confused, Lorin, then, in similar fashion, does it also follow, that the uchikoshi rule possibly apply here?

        the one left standing
        chats up the scarecrow

        – Clysta

        a road sign
        points in the direction
        of the Monument

        – John Daleiden

        are we
        there yet?

        – Curt Linderman

        where it concerns the “chats up” in Clysta’s verse and the verbal question in Curt’s verse?

        Kindly and respectively, please explain to me Lorin
        if there is some exception i am not seeing here…in this example?
        Please note, i am not trying to criticize….just want to learn, and have you clarify my confusion….or misconception of renku rules.

        1. Hi Wendy,
          I’ll leave the real answer to Lorin. I intended this definition:

          Verb: chat up
          Usage: informal
          Talk or behave amorously, without serious intentions • The guys always try to chat up the new secretaries
          = coquet, dally, flirt, mash, philander, romance
          ~ speak, talk
          ⇒ vamp, wanton

          thus setting a different mood/purpose from Curt’s ponted question.
          Good question from you. I look forward to Lorin’s reply.

          1. Clysta re: ‘…..thus setting a different mood/purpose from Curt’s ponted question.
            Good question from you. I look forward to Lorin’s reply.’

            so, you think it may be a matter of degree?
            something approaching “talk-lite” vs “serious question”?
            i find that view interesting!

            Now, If i am playing the devil’s advocate….in this discussion….
            an use an example of dance….
            you say when children dancing around the mulberry bush is allowed, along with a serious master ballet dancer dancing The Swan Lake Ballet, because of a difference of mood/or purpose/intention ?

            is the winter moon
            a little
            pregnant tonight

            And the devil will argue that dance is dance and talk is talk.

          2. I don’t know “the real answer” Clysta, but yes, I agree that the lingo of “chat up” implies a very different kind of vocalization than the frustrated or desparate whine of “are we/ there yet” (with the emphasis on the word “there”)

        2. yes, Clysta, we both wait for Lorin to answer….
          and your definitions, are similar to the one’s i remember looking up when you first posted your verse….as i was not completely clear about the usage of this phrase.
          most of what i found had the basis of ‘talk’ in it,
          and since we are not yet into the love verses….things such as non-verbal seductions….such as winks, etc. towards flirting advances i believe
          are not a consideration here….
          Clysta, i too, am waiting to hear clarification from Lorin.
          This is not to squash the wonderful verse and how fitting it is a
          link…that Curt has written….which i love, love, love!

        3. The “the uchikoshi rule ” applies to all of the verses, Wendy. (except verse 1, obviously). .
          The idea is to link to the immediately previous verse and be sure not to link to the verse before the previous verse. It’s how we endeavor to keep a renku flowing forward, rather than getting stuck.

          I’m not sure quite what it is you mean by “(does – implied ) the uchikoshi rule possibly apply here? ” (Here being: “where it concerns the “chats up” in Clysta’s verse and the verbal question in Curt’s verse?” This is only my interpretation of your words.)

          All I can make of it is : are you perhaps implying, Wendy, something like this: 1. In Clysta’s verse we observe that someone “chats up” a scarecrow and 2. in Curt’s verse there is direct speech: “are we there yet?”. Does the question “are we there yet?” in verse 4 take the reader back to Clysta’s “chatting up…” in verse 2, thereby committing the sin of uchikoshi?

          Does it take you back to Crysta’s verse, Wendy?

          Well, there may be different opinions on the subject, but to me it doesn’t. To claim an instance of ‘uchikoshi’ between an image of an adult observed by a 3rd party to be “chatting up” a scarecrow and the image of a child or children voicing his/her/ their boredom and frustration in relation to a long road trip seems to me to be a tad too forensic.

          The main idea is to keep the renku moving forward. So, does the childish whine “are we/ there yet?” take you (as reader) back to “the last one standing chats up the scarecrow?”.

          All I can say is that it doesn’t take me back.

          1. Just a reminder of our times, perhaps useful for all of us who don’t believe in the flat earth theory.
            For me, today is Friday the 13th of December & right now the time is 5:54pm. That’s AEST. I know that for many of you in the USA, your time is EST (as it is with John Stevenson) If we know we’re in different time zones it’s fine. Everyone can relax a little.

            Now I go to feed the cat, water the beans and then cook my dinner. And I’ll return to have a look at newer verses tomorrow.

          2. thank you Lorin, for getting back to me on this.
            So it doesn’t revolve around the word/topic of “talk” or “verbiage” is only matters on the image it brings and if it moves you forward and not backwards!
            This is soooo cool! Thank you, thank you, thank you for
            stating it so clearly for me. Lorin, this was truly helpful for me.

            And Clysta, i see now where you were coming from.
            Sharing with me, and shining the way.

  72. Congrats Curt! a wonderfully, relatable verse.
    Lorin….a delightful verse pick for our renku.

    are we

    there yet?——– Curt Linderman

    the drone
    of back tires spinning
    deep into snow

    the sleepy silence
    of a snow
    covered village

    the buzz
    of chain saws
    on frozen branches

    the tug fit
    of snow tire chains
    on a SUV

    2. correction: (though on a moonless poem)

      are we

      there yet?——– Curt Linderman

      the tug fit
      of snow tire chains
      on an SUV

  73. are we
    there yet?

    – Curt Linderman
    *
    the winter moon
    puts its finishing touch
    on her quilt
    *
    her dreams muffled deep
    in the quilt
    and the winter moon
    *

        1. Love or not love, Orense and Pamela , this needs to be a winter moon verse. Orense, you do need to mention the moon and establish that the verse is a winter verse. Try again.

    1. Fatma, be sure to check the guidelines (above) before you post. In this case, “Our fifth verse will be a 3-line verse (without a cut) on the topic of the winter moon ”
      You’ve posted a one line verse. The call is for a 3-line verse this time. (also, we won’t have any one-liners in this renku.)
      Do post again, when you’ve composed a 3-line verse as outlined in the guidelines.

  76. A wonderful addition, Lorin and Curt. Congratulations!

    are we
    there yet?

    – Curt Linderman

    with a gust of wind
    snowflakes falling
    for a second time

        1. But where is the moon, Orense? This verse is meant to be the all-important moon verse. The moon has to be in this verse spot.
          Try again!

  77. I love the brevity of this one–it’s a slice from everyone’s life. Nicely done, curt, and well chosen (as always!, Lorin).
    **
    are we
    there yet?

    – Curt Linderman
    *
    no question
    that this moon
    is the winter moon
    *
    a cold moon
    always
    on the horizon
    *
    the promise of snow
    lies with the cold moon
    on the horizon
    *
    i

  79. Wonderful! Curt and Lorin!

    are we

    there yet?
    – Curt Linderman

    the afterimage
    of winter moon
    inside young eyes

    the afterimage
    of winter moon
    at every turn

  80. There is nothing in 1-3 to suggest this must be the voices of children : it could, for instance, be those of all the participants in the renga. Therefore v4 should establish that these are the voices of children (in the back seat).
    4
    are we
    there yet?
    5
    an intermittent moon
    highlights child protest
    from the back seat

    moonlight and fresh air
    and a distribution of sweets
    calms fretful children

    the children’s march
    is delightfully deranged
    by flickering moonlight

  81. are we
    there yet?

    Curt Linderman

    the kids say ‘night
    joking, don’t let
    the bed bugs bite

    Well done Curt, your verse made me smile with its humour.

  82. Many thanks, Lorin! It’s such a joy to read and also learn from everyone’s responses and the subsequent commentaries.

      1. Eavonka! Thank you for your kind words. So nice to hear from you, sending you all my best.

  83. A fun choice Lorin and an evocative verse Curt. I’d love to read a short story based on the first memory that comes to mind with those four words.

  85. Congratulations, Curt! A great choice, Lorin!

    are we
    there yet?

    – Curt Linderman

    a winter moon
    shining on the just
    and the unjust

    winter moonlight
    resting on the children’s
    sleeping faces

    in wintertime
    the same face
    on the moon

    the silence
    of the moon
    in winter

    tires rolling
    on the long road
    lit by moonlight

  86. Congratulations Curt! Thank you Lorin! A light and humorous verse to continue our renku.:) Thank you for the delightful read at the top!

  87. are we
    there yet?

    Curt Linderman

    walking the ice road
    under the quicksilver light
    of the winter moon

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