Skip to content

The Renku Sessions: 12 Tones – Musical Chairs, Week 3

renku_300

Welcome to THF’s Renku Sessions. I’m Lorin Ford, acting as sabaki/ guide for this renku.

*****

The wakiku joins the hokku, completing the first section of our renku.

 

Musical Chairs – a Junicho Renku

 

musical chairs
a handful
of hot chestnuts

– Keith Evetts

 

the one left standing
chats up the scarecrow

– Clysta

 

I’m happy to say that many of the offered verses linked well, in one way or another, to our hokku. Clysta’s wakiku, like several other of the offered verses, uses ‘scarecrow’ as the kigo.  What impresses me about this particular verse is the smooth, close linkage of “the one left standing” to “musical chairs”. It’s part of the game that one person will be left standing when all of the chairs are taken. Line 3 ( “chats up the scarecrow” ) brings the unexpected, the shift. The finely balanced combination of pathos and humour in Clysta’s wakiku is excellent.

*

Moving on now to our 3rd verse, the daisan. This is a non-seasonal, 3-lined verse (sometimes called the breakaway verse) It has no cut or break. It must shift completely away from the hokku. However, the daisan does need to have some kind of connection/ link with the wakiku. So – no music, games, furniture, seats, hands, heat or nuts. No eating. Also, no flowers or moons or love: these will come later. Our daisan must have no seasonal reference whatsoever but it will link to the wakiku in some way.

“The function of the daisan is to break away, to open fresh ground…” wrote the late John E. Carley, and “… both sense and syntax of daisan are expected to open outwards. It is both germinal and unfinished, suggestive of multiple possibilities.”

 

I’m looking forward to reading all of the daisan verse proposals.

Lorin

 

The submission deadlines will be Sundays, midnight eastern US time.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Haiku Foundation reminds you that participation in our offerings assumes respectful and appropriate behavior from all parties. Please see our Code of Conduct policy: https://thehaikufoundation.org/about-thf/policies/#code-of-conduct

John Stevenson

Comments (158)

    1. Federico, it’s just that the closing date for submissions each week is Sunday, midnight eastern US time. (EST). I hope you’ll join us for the next verse, in week 4.

      1. Hi Lorin,
        I keep missing the deadlines on Sundays! I’ll try again next week! I usually have more time on the weekdays. I’ll see what I can di. I hope you all in USA had a very Happy Thanksgiving Holiday!
        – Diana🦃

  1. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow –Clysta

    the shark
    entangled
    in a sea of plastic

    viewed from the mountain
    desert sands
    stretch to the horizon

    from her bank lock-box
    she selects
    two emerald rings

  2. musical chairs –
    a handful
    of hot chestnuts

    – Keith Evetts

    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow

    – Clysta

    Sisiphus rolls his
    blade into flaking stone,
    mountain full of night

    Sisiphus rolling
    his flaking stone up the
    mountain full of night

    Sisiphus rolling
    flaking stone up the mountain
    full of night

  3. musical chairs –
    a handful
    of hot chestnuts
    – Keith Evetts
    .
    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    – Clysta
    .
    .
    cast aside
    with 37 dollars
    to drink myself blind
    .
    drinking
    a whole bottle
    of pride
    .
    all too familiar
    this story
    of a lonely soul
    .
    somewhere in the garden
    a dog
    off the leash
    .
    metrical feet
    in turn
    along the yellow brick road

  4. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow –Clysta

    in the lab
    a biologist
    prepares sample slides

    the real estate
    agent sets up
    a for-sale sign

    we roller skate
    with abandon
    at the rink

  5. a child’s
    sponsored silence
    ends in an f-bomb

    she abandons
    her old life
    in a luggage locker

  6. Congratulations, Clysta, on your verse.

    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    –Clysta

    she finds
    a kitten
    in an old boot
    .
    in the rag bag
    old t-shirts
    and a mouse nest

    at the podium
    a minister rehearses
    her sermon

    at a podium
    the minister practices
    this week’s sermon

    1. Cancel verses with podium as some might consider that furniture so instead, I offer

      an off-the-cuff start
      to the minister’s
      weekly sermon

      1. Nancy, have you considered:

        at the pulpit
        a minister practices
        this week’s sermon
        ?
        I agree with you that ‘podium’ isn’t right. Though, now I think of it I suppose a pulpit would be classified as furniture, too. Never mind. Keep it for another day.

  7. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow –Clysta

    the engineer sounds
    his whistle
    at rail crossing

    intently gazing
    through his lope
    he gasps

    the director
    yells cut
    as the wagons circle

  8. tawny owls hoot
    under
    a sickle shaped moon

    squirrels run
    helter skelter
    through the trees

    the hamster
    makes a bed
    out of fresh straw

    the corn dolly
    waves
    from her window

    at the wheatsheaf
    they stop
    for a pint

    heritage crafts
    at the mill
    learning to grind flour

  9. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    –Clysta

    a rush
    of barn swallows
    over the neighborhood

        1. Thanks, I am glad you pointed it out…I am learning so much… I also need to be more vigilant:)

  10. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    – Clysta

    a partial footprint
    by a free plastic bag
    on a shifting shore

  11. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    Clysta
    *
    drawing tears with his plea
    of not guilty
    to murder
    *
    not murder but a case
    of mistaken
    identity
    *

    of mistaken identity

  12. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    — Clysta
    *
    at the museum
    the dinosaur skeleton
    towers over all

  13. musical chairs –
    a handful
    of hot chestnuts
    ——Keith Evetts

    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    —-–Clysta
    .

    high cirri
    race over the
    mountaintops
    .

    he raises his right hand
    and promises
    to walk in beauty
    .

    the clatter of dishes
    merits a single open eye
    from the cat
    .

    1. I have to laugh, Jonathon. This is so true. Yes, all sounds that carry the possibly of food preparation will alert the cat. (Every cat is the cat, of course.)

  14. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow –Clysta

    the butcher
    carves up a beef carcass
    for shoppers

    last in the race
    Slow Nellie
    crosses the finish line

  15. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow

    (Clysta)

    the wind
    whistles round
    corn ears

    a marathon
    couple embrace
    the microphone

    a warrior
    takes the shortcut
    through a field

    an artist
    hawking the same
    old designs

    an old veteran
    sits erect at attention
    to salute

  16. walking
    side by side
    they don’t say a word

    striding
    together
    under the storm clouds

    skipping
    all the way
    to school

    racing
    to the doughnut shop
    after church
    _

        1. I love your verses, especially

          an off-the-cuff start
          to the minister’s
          weekly sermon
          -Nancy Brady

          she finds
          a kitten
          in an old boot
          -Nancy Brady

  17. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow –Clysta

    the ocean
    explorer plunges
    into the depths

    in the beauty
    parlor she speaks
    only Japanese

  18. the last one standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    Clysta

    boyhood memories
    of grandma’s
    moonshine still

    river baptisms
    scare away
    the devil

  19. A lot more
    than he bargained for.
    Salt of the earth.

    In the mirror, she lets go
    of a thousand faces.
    Bathroom break.

    Holding
    a candle
    the heart’s vigil.

    1. Hello, Michelle and welcome.
      There is only one haiku-like verse is a renku. That is the first verse, the hokku. Like a haiku, a hokku has a ‘cut’ or ‘break. There is only one hokku in any renku. Our hokku for this renku is:
      Hello, Michelle. There is only one haiku-like verse is any renku: the first verse, the hokku . Like a haiku, a hokku has a ‘cut’ or ‘break’, like this:

      musical chairs –
      a handful
      of hot chestnuts (our hokku for this current renku, by Keith Evetts)

      Also, don’t use the period/ full stop in any hokku. The norm in EL renku is to use an en or em dash to indicate the break. Some may use an ellipses but that is always up to the sabaki/ guide/ Führer.

      I hope this information will be useful to you.

      1. Please ignore my repetitions, above. I’m just awake and got mixed up in the cursed website bar.

  20. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    Clysta
    *
    pumping iron
    puts another day
    on his life
    *
    truly a friend
    to the odd-man
    out
    *

  21. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow

    Clysta

    down the road
    the wind blows
    in her hair

    wrapping up
    the soft feel
    of her gloves

    headlights twinkle
    on their way
    home

    a wise look
    in the horse’s eye
    as it chews straw

    laughing
    as the butter melts
    on our corn

  22. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow –Clysta

    come as you are
    before the ku
    disappears

    talk of ghosts
    who haunt
    the campgrounds

  23. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    — Clysta

    a choke collar
    in the ebb and flow of time
    from rival vantage points

  24. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow – Clysta

    the shadow
    of a vulture
    overhead

    shadows
    of castles
    in the sand

    silent knights
    on chessboard patrol
    in the park

  25. one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow –Clysta

    —-

    more than three weeks
    imagining
    the story

    must be smart
    good at predicting
    what will come

  26. the one left standing

    chats up the scarecrow
    – Clysta

    whittling
    a pointed end
    on the fallen twig

  27. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    – Clysta

    watching trees
    follow the wind
    this way and that

    patching up
    the holes in last year’s
    work clothes

    seeking sunlight
    a tortoise climbs
    onto a flat rock

  28. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow –Clysta

    I shovel manure
    from horse stalls
    at the racetrack

    my scant Russian
    results
    in a police response

  29. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    – Clysta

    startled grouse
    burst out of the covert
    with a whirr

    seek the lone pine
    that marks the start
    of the mountain trail

    with outstretched arms
    we greet the sun
    on this new day

    the gloved hands
    of a man who makes money
    from the rag trade

    with a wooden look
    he suggests
    nude forest bathing

    1. :-) Hang on to your “wooden look” verse for some other time, in this or another renku, Harrison. It’s a beaut verse for the right place in a renku.

  30. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    – Clysta

    she asks
    for a slice of pie
    at the sandbox

    at the sandbox
    she asks
    for a slice of pie

    1. This is a fun one, the worst place to eat pie :) which creates a subtle connection with the wakiku. Wonderful

        1. …Congratulations for your beautiful poem appearing in the Monthly Kukai, yesterday!

  31. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow –Clysta

    beneath the pillow
    a note too small
    to be noticed

    only one pillow
    now lies
    on the bed

    Friday nights
    are for
    pillow fights

  32. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow –Clysta

    the scent
    of fresh bread
    fills the house

    a road sign
    points in the direction
    of the Monument

  33. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow –Clysta

    marooned
    on a Pacific island
    she learns to fish

    in the cemetery
    a long trench
    for virus victims

  34. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    Clysta
    *
    reading the mystery
    that doesn’t
    need the others
    *

      1. Yes, Carol, glad you caught it. “an old map of a pilgrim” was (shall we say?) a tad startling. :-)

        1. Glad you made a comment on this verse, Lorin, my first effort didn’t sit well after a few readings. When you hi-light things such as this, I learn, and hopefully others do, too.

      2. Hi Carol. Just passing through, I recall that ‘pilgrimage’ is a spring season word in our reference. But maybe this use “of the pilgrims” could be seen as non-seasonal or all-seasons for the sake of the daisan’s specifications?

        1. Ah, right, Keith, thanks for this, something to remember. And I have to admit I didn’t know that ‘pilgrimage’ was a spring seasonal word.

          It would be handy to know if the use ‘of the pilgrims’ is non or all seasonal.

          Thanks Keith

          1. I’m glad Keith was passing through to remind us we’re using a kiyose. Thanks, Keith!

            An interesting question, Carol. There are, of course, various pilgrimages in the world, for instance it is the hope of any Muslim in Indonesia to visit Mecca at least once in his/her lifetime. However, since we are using ‘The 500 Essential Japanese’ as our kiyose here’s my copy & paste from the Spring section:

            “pilgrimage (henro, all spring). When many Japanese visit sacred places. The best known involves walking the circumference of the island of Shikoku, visiting 88 temples. ”

            I recall that I’ve participated in one of John Stevenson’s renku, in which there is a ‘pilgimage’ verse: ‘Pilgrims Stride’.
            https://www.thehaikufoundation.org/renkuarchive/2014_pilgrimsstride.pdf

            (Yikes! that was 20 years ago! )

            So the mention of pilgrims in this renku, in context of the fact that we’re using a kiyose,
            would indicate the season Spring. It would be just as “off” as using “scarecrow” in a no-season verse.

          2. re my : (Yikes! that was 20 years ago! )
            Duh! Sunday morning in Australia & I can’t count.
            John’s ‘Pilgrims Stride’ renku was 10 years ago, not 20. Still, 10 years is a fair while ago, now.

          3. You are a mine of information, Lorin. Many thanks for your explanation, and the link.
            That was the year I ventured into the renku sessions. I tried my hand at a few verses, then as now, I’m still tackling my way through it all :)

            What struck me, when I look through the archives is the many names that do not submit entries anymore, the banter was a delight to read and a huge learning curve.

          4. Yes, Carol. I’ve been wondering especially about Betty Shropshire. It seems to me she just disappeared some time during the previous renku than this one. I hope she is ok.

          5. I, too, hope Betty is ok. If I’m not mistaken it was Betty who offered her virtual ‘support pants’ and then I offered them back, laundered, at a time when submissions got a bit heated. I sincerely hope Betty is in a position to dig those pants out.

  35. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    Clysta
    *
    sampling
    a mystery
    from the series
    *
    again the bike
    topples
    sideways
    *

    long after
    the first installment’s
    been forgotten
    *

  36. musical chairs –
    a handful
    of hot chestnuts

    – Keith Evetts

    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow

    – Clysta

    old sweeper monk
    enlightened by
    the wind

  37. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    Clysta
    *
    loosening up
    the audience
    with another in-law joke
    *
    catching them unaware
    with his first
    comedy routine
    *
    going through the routine
    for a laugh
    a minute
    *

  38. Apologies for misspelling your name Clysta in my previous entries!

    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow – Clysta

    a mountain range
    carves the horizon
    with jagged peaks.

    a banjo busker
    belts out ballads
    on the boulevard

    a cowboy sings
    carols to cattle
    in a corral

    a beautiful nun
    hums Ave Maria
    in her sleep

  39. Clysta and Lorin…a marvelous wakiku for our renku journey!

    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    Clysta

    spiderman float
    floats
    above the crowd
    ~ ~ ~
    the marching band
    marching
    in the rain

    1. the one left standing
      chats up the scarecrow
      –clysta

      spiderman
      floats
      above the crowd

  40. musical chairs –
    a handful
    of hot chestnuts

    – Keith Evetts

    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow

    – Clysta

    reach-me-
    down a rabbit hole
    smile

      1. Thank you so much Madeleine I wasn’t sure how it would be recieved as it’s conceptual…:)

  41. musical chairs –
    a handful
    of hot chestnuts

    – Keith Evetts

    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow

    – Clysta

    at noon sharp
    wedding bells ambush
    the pigeons

  42. musical chairs –
    a handful
    of hot chestnuts

    – Keith Evetts

    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow

    – Clysta

    the garden gnome
    looking handsome
    after a tinder date

    1. Orense, for the daisan, we need some kind of link to the wakiku but also (and important) the shift is necessary . Your verse here is too close to Clysta’s (scarecrow/garden gnome) and also ‘tinder date’ might work in a (so-called) ‘love verse’ but it doesn’t work in this position (daisan) no matter how tongue-in-cheek you intend it to be.

      1. Noted, thank you for the direction. Fortunately I went for more than one theme with my offerings…pheww:)

  43. musical chairs –
    a handful
    of hot chestnuts

    – Keith Evetts

    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow

    – Clysta

    the matchmaker
    still working with
    binders

  44. musical chairs –
    a handful
    of hot chestnuts

    – Keith Evetts

     
    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow

    – Clysta

    the sign says
    off to see the wizard
    for a comeback

  45. Congratulations Clysta and Lorin for a wonderfully smooth addition!

    musical chairs –
    a handful
    of hot chestnuts

    – Keith Evetts

     

    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow

    – Clysta

    on the fencepost
    a hat shaped to fit
    a dozen heads

    on the fencepost
    a hat shaped to fit
    any head

  46. Congratulations Clysta – it is the perfect wakiku for Keith’s hokku.
    .
    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    .
    – Clysta

    1. Not yet, Biswajit, but keep this one. There may be a place for it later. We’ll have to wait and see.

  47. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow –Clysta

    on the horizon
    mountains
    I have never crossed

  48. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow

    -clysta

    lorin’s renku is simply getting better every week
    because she is making such fine choices. thank
    you lorin for helming.

    clysta your verse makes a perfect wakiku.
    it is really fine and funny too. like lorin,
    and others i’m sure, i sensed the sadness
    of rejection in this person left without a chair,
    turning to whoever will listen.

  49. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    Clysta
    *
    passers by hesitant
    to cross
    the picket line
    *
    the next shift
    clocks in
    still half asleep
    *

    1. Laurie, think of the rhythm of the three lines. How would you recite these two verses aloud?
      Taking your first:

      passers by hesitant
      to cross
      the picket line
      *
      I’d have it:

      passers-by
      hesitant to cross
      the picket line

  50. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow – Crysta

    waving farewell
    in slow motion
    from a train station

    graffiti screams
    from old bricks while
    litter fills an alley

    virtual nods replace
    hugs and memories
    are shared only online

  51. Congratulations Crysta, I always enjoy your verses and thank you Lorin!

    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow – Crysta

    reading pavement cracks
    while strumming a banjo
    for listeners who never give

    1. Dan, There are too many ‘-ings’ ! Following Crysta’s “standing” you have ‘reading’ and ‘strumming’.
      Counting Crysta’s ( in the verse you’re linking to) there is ‘standing’, reading’ & ‘strumming’, all present participles. . . verb plus -ing. It would be best to avoid any present participles at all in your candidate daisan following Crysta’s verse.

  52. 1
    musical chairs –
    a handful
    of hot chestnuts
    2
    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    3
    two quare fellows
    discuss world affairs
    high in the sky

    nothing else to do
    but make the best of it
    old chap
    3
    I took the hint
    so off to the bright lights
    and a bit more fun

    1. ” two quare fellows ” . . . are you Irish, Dick? The word seems to be Irish for “queer”.

      quare
      /kwɛː/
      adjective
      adjective: quare

      1.
      Irish form of queer (sense 1 of the adjective).
      “you’ve done some quare things yourself in your time”
      2.
      informal•Northern Irish
      remarkable; excellent.
      “he has a quare voice on him”

  53. Congratulations Clysta..a beautiful wakiku. It works perfectly with Keith’s link. Thank you Lorin for a great choice and for your insight.

  54. It is Thanksgiving Day in the United States today and I am feeling very thankful to Lorin for selecting my verse and thankful to all poets who support and make this place of online learning and sharing valued and hospitable. I am writing this as I depart for family time where I am unable to be online for this next verse. Again, thank you Lorin — your evaluation means much to me. Carry on!

  55. Clysta, congratulations on your excellent verse 2.
    Lorin—a fine choice that moves this Rinku forward.

  56. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow –Clysta

    our home gate
    swings open
    to new adventure

  57. Lorin…this is a perfect choice for our wakiku! Love your commentary, and the clarity of arriving at Clysta’s so fitting verse.
    Congrats Clysta for writing this brilliant and humourous verse that links so well to our hokku.

    musical chairs_
    a handful
    of hot chestnuts____Keith Evetts

    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow_____Clysta

    put on pause
    by the talk line’s
    robot

    BTW: Lorin….L3 needs to be changed to L2(chats up the scarecrow)

    1. “BTW: Lorin….L3 needs to be changed to L2(chats up the scarecrow)” – Wendy

      Yes, it should be L2, of course. (I plead “slip of the old arthritic fingers, your Honour)
      However, I’m just going to have to live with that mistake and hope everyone will realise it’s a mistake, as you have, Wendy. I’m certainly not going to bother John (who posts the head pages) to correct it.

  58. Congratulations, Clysta! A great wakiku choice, Lorin!

    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow

    (Clysta)

    a lineup
    of crows looms
    on a branch

    walkers turn
    into runners in
    a heavy rain

    more questions
    than answers after
    an earthquake

    bloody but
    happy after a
    free-for-all

    on a blind
    date at a movie
    revival

  59. the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    Clysta
    *
    new heroes
    on the plinth
    of the old
    *
    Hope “plinth” doesn’t count as furniture!

    1. It can count, Laurie. When in doubt, it’s best to check both Merriam-Webster and Oxford dictionaries.
      https://www.oed.com › dictionary › plinth_n
      https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/plinth

      Here you have ‘plinth’ in context of ‘heroes’. My first thought is “war heroes” (though it ain’t necessarily so, could be any sort of heroes). I can’t tell if you intend your words in this verse to be taken literally or figuratively, though of course the link to Clysta’s ( “the one left standing”) is good,

      1. Hi—just thinking about statues and how many old “heroes” have been pulled down for being racists and worse, with new monuments going up in their place.

        1. ah, Laurie, I was musing and googling & making more coffee when you posted this. Yes, I did get your idea of old “heroes” being replaced by the new. It’s the word ‘plinth’, which is a base,
          that has had me musing.

    2. Something has been niggling at me about ‘plinth’, though. It’s true that carpenters and builders are using plinths every day, but that’s not what you mean. The issue, I think, is that we can (or I can) get the word ‘plinth’ mixed up with ‘pedestal’.

      “What is the difference between a pedestal and a plinth?
      A plinth is defined as a flat and planar support which separates the sculpture from the environment. A pedestal, on the other hand, is defined as a shaft-like form that raises the sculpture and separates it from the base.” – Wikipedia

      Looks like your plinth is in the clear as long as there’s not a pedestal between plinth and sculpture.
      Hmmm . . .

  60. Congratulations, Clysta on a lovely, streamlined verse. Thanks, Lorin for the great selection.
    **
    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    Clysta
    **
    their silent exchange
    of words
    to the wise
    *
    exchanging more
    than words
    to the wise
    *
    translating the kois’
    colorful
    dialogues
    *
    glare
    from the shine
    of wingtip shoes
    *

    1. Very nice verses, Laurie, my favorite is “glare from the shine…”

      I appreciate your thoughtful verse above, “new heroes…” A lot to ponder…our first president’s statues in some cities being replaced and put away in storage.

  61. Beautiful verse Clysta! Beautiful choice and explanation, Lorin! Beautiful to be creating onward together!

    the one left standing
    chats up the scarecrow
    – Clysta

    half the ducks
    in the pond
    upside-down

    1. I enjoyed this Pamela and will think of your verse often when we see ducks on our daily drives by the Potomac River!

      1. Thank you Dan. It was inspired by my walk around a pond in Elizabeth Park, near my home. Many ducks! Many reflections!!

    2. This verse doesn’t fit the daisan spot, Pamela . . . a case of the rather difficult ‘link and turn’ required of a daisan, so I can’t select it here, but as a verse I like it a lot. Keep it in your pocket, though. You never know, there may come a future verse that it might link to. (May or may not, of course.)

Comments are closed.

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Back To Top