the plum tree by the job centre is flowering — Sarah Davies, LEAF #1 2023
A fine, seemingly effortless haiku. There are two visual images. Two semantic units but remaining grammatically continuous as one sentence, one integrated whole, with a smooth perceived shift in perspective. There is no formal cut, but nevertheless the two images are situated alongside each other via the preposition “by.” Another (literal) form of ‘juxtaposition,’ if you like. As with yesterday’s verse, the line-breaks slow down a reader who might otherwise gallop through the sentence, effectively adding weight to, urging consideration of, each line.
I don’t think that “job centre—/ the nearby plum tree / in flower” would ‘cut it’ nearly as well, although those who find it uncongenial to look beyond conventional techniques might have preferred that. The job centre would be further separated from the plum tree, and they would have been more contrasted than combined. In this verse it is the link, the combination, that is to be emphasised; rather than the difference, the opposition or tension, between them.
There is plenty of scope for a reader to reflect, and arrive at insight. Seekers of employment attend the centre because they need work: hoping for purpose, for the fruits of labour, at best for fulfilment. Before them is an example of nature. The plum tree is doing its job—quietly, without resistance, getting on with it, fulfilling what a plum tree is destined to do. Its beauty is bestowed equally on the poor and on the rich. There is comfort in it. There is a hint of “be yourself” in this verse. And perhaps an undercurrent from the gospels: “Why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin. And yet I say unto you, That even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.” (Matthew 6)
There is also that warm, detached, haikai humour that hallmarks some of the best haiku.
the plum tree
by the job centre
is flowering
— Sarah Davies, LEAF #1 2023
A fine, seemingly effortless haiku. There are two visual images. Two semantic units but remaining grammatically continuous as one sentence, one integrated whole, with a smooth perceived shift in perspective. There is no formal cut, but nevertheless the two images are situated alongside each other via the preposition “by.” Another (literal) form of ‘juxtaposition,’ if you like. As with yesterday’s verse, the line-breaks slow down a reader who might otherwise gallop through the sentence, effectively adding weight to, urging consideration of, each line.
I don’t think that “job centre—/ the nearby plum tree / in flower” would ‘cut it’ nearly as well, although those who find it uncongenial to look beyond conventional techniques might have preferred that. The job centre would be further separated from the plum tree, and they would have been more contrasted than combined. In this verse it is the link, the combination, that is to be emphasised; rather than the difference, the opposition or tension, between them.
There is plenty of scope for a reader to reflect, and arrive at insight. Seekers of employment attend the centre because they need work: hoping for purpose, for the fruits of labour, at best for fulfilment. Before them is an example of nature. The plum tree is doing its job—quietly, without resistance, getting on with it, fulfilling what a plum tree is destined to do. Its beauty is bestowed equally on the poor and on the rich. There is comfort in it. There is a hint of “be yourself” in this verse. And perhaps an undercurrent from the gospels: “Why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin. And yet I say unto you, That even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.” (Matthew 6)
There is also that warm, detached, haikai humour that hallmarks some of the best haiku.
Let’s hope those seeking work get a plum job.