HAIKU DIALOGUE – Opposites Attract – junior/senior
Opposites Attract
Hello – kj here – I will be taking the reins again for the next few weeks, with the theme ‘opposites attract’. The prompt each week will be a pair of opposites – feel free to be inspired by one or the other, or both! I hope this draws you towards excellent haiku – the way the compass, even in these uncertain times, will always settle on ‘North’…
quarantine
compass needle
spinning
kjmunro
next week’s theme: OPPOSITES ATTRACT – blunt/sharp
The deadline is midnight Pacific Daylight Savings Time, Saturday October 3, 2020.
Please submit one or two original unpublished haiku inspired by the week’s theme by clicking here: Contact Form. Please put Haiku Dialogue in the Subject box, & include your name as you would like it to appear, & your place of residence, with your poem. I look forward to reading your submissions.
A few haiku will be selected for commentary each week.
Please note that by submitting, you agree that your work may appear in the column – neither acknowledgment nor acceptance emails will be sent. All communication about the poems that are posted in the column will be added as blog comments.
Below is the commentary for junior/senior:
Through both the poems selected, & especially the ones chosen for commentary each week, it is hoped that readers will start to see the kinds of poems an editor prefers. For the poets who are submitting, it can be a useful exercise to examine the poems selected compared to those that are not (remembering that sometimes an entire submission is excellent, & it is difficult to choose just one poem for the column!). In general, I am finding too much telling – that is, narrative – & not enough “gaps” – those things left out of a haiku for the reader to figure out… & please keep in mind that, as with all art, these things can be a matter of opinion!
turning sixty
the cool click
back to zeroHelen Buckingham
A milestone birthday in so many ways – this ‘cool click’ reminds me of a row-counter for knitting, or a fancy watch or clock, or maybe a fitbit, or another electronic device… there is something intriguing about going ‘back to zero’…
autumn garage sale
his father’s golf clubs
tagged nfsJohn S Green
Concrete images set in a specific seasonal scene – like a haiku, three little letters on a tag can mean so much…
climate change
father recycles
grandfather’s habitsLamart Cooper
Here the poet has put a twist on the now-common practice of recycling – & how many of us can recall at least the stories of the frugal habits & cost-saving measures of our parents & grandparents…
feeling the same inside
regardless of age
nesting dollsLaurie Greer
Washington, DC
Many will be able to relate to the concept of feeling the same as they did years ago, in some ways at least, & here the poet has juxtaposed the perfect image to take this poem to another level – identical dolls, each one smaller than the next, one inside the other…
my turn
to wear dad’s shoes
refugee campMirela Brailean
România
Another key to a successful haiku is not telling the reader how to feel – here the poet describes a potentially heart-wrenching & politically-charged scenario in calm, straightforward language with powerful results…
mam’s denture
only half in
baby’s mouthsimonj
UK
This poem demonstrates how a poet can write in a more narrative style, but still leave a “gap” as described above… the contrast between the teething baby & the grandmother’s dentures incorporates the idea of junior/senior…
junior senior
the vulture overhead
circlingStephen A. Peters
A reminder that the very youngest & the very oldest are perhaps the most at risk…
& here are the rest of my selections:
a rocking chair
where father used to sit
my own shadowAgus Maulana Sunjaya
Tangerang, Indonesia
sleepy little head
nodding in the breeze
a mother’s songAlbert Schepers
Windsor Ontario, CA
this morning
my son’s bristles
in my razorandrew shimield
children’s game –
an old man’s stick
move a leafgioco di bimbi –
il bastone d’un vecchio
sposta una fogliaAngiola Inglese
quinceanera –
that faraway look
in grandma’s eyesarvinder kaur
Chandigarh, India
watching the captain
alone on the bridgewing
… far horizonB.A. France
“Not now!”
Mum’s translating
Dad’s wordsBakhtiyar Amini
a trainee takes over
the mentor’s job –
downsizingBona M. Santos
Los Angeles, CA
with some advice
the old man passes down
a wrenchBryan Rickert
the mirror
pulling away from the tree
old portraitC.R. Harper
spring fever
a senior couple kissing
among young adultscezar-florin ciobîcă
“I taught your father
back in the day
hope you measure up”Charles Harmon
Los Angeles, California
the corner office
door
still shutCharlotte Hrenchuk
mimosa flowers…
my secret crush in
junior high schoolCherry A
Assam, India
Parkinson’s…
my old mentor’s letters
each harder to readClifford Rames
Freehold, NJ
fathers –
proof that cracked bells
still ringDan Campbell
oh the irony!
senior citizen discounts
for Eternal ChildDana Rapisardi
water trail –
five ducklings
behind the swanscia sull’acqua –
cinque anatroccoli
dietro il cignoDaniela Misso
blue moon
my old dog
misty-eyedDavid Gale
Gloucester, UK
for the camera…
wearing grandpa’s boots
up to his kneesDebbie Scheving
Bremerton, WA
henbane
her dream of flying
when she was a childDeborah Karl-Brandt
voices of autumn –
the smile of child
in father’s heartDennys Cambarau
Italy
delicate rose –
the class tell their teacher
she stinksDorothy Burrows
almost October…
the withered pansies
around the shootsElisa Allo
online schooling
my son and my mother
classmatesFranjo Ordanić
grandfather’s razor
in his grandson’s hands
– he has a girlfriendGordana Vlašić
Never ending argument
Over seniority –
Twins.Goutam Dutta
Kolkata, India
the spit and image
of her father
graduation dayGreer Woodward
Waimea, HI
faded –
grandmother holds me
in her armsHelga Stania
clever son
home from uni
… usual pile of laundryIngrid Baluchi
Macedonia
Denny’s dining
counting the years
to a senior mealJackie Chou
Pico Rivera, CA USA
Shoshin
the possibilities
of autumnJanice Munro
Rounds before dawn
Doctor’s eyes
Awaken students(I am a medical student. On certain rotations, the team would have to round on patients very early in the mornings. Whenever the attending physician made eye contact before asking me a question (usually to test my knowledge on a given topic), I always felt a bit of a rush. Inevitably, I would feel much more awake afterwards.)
Jerry French
Orlando, FL
child’s tears –
the broken shell of the tortoiseJulia Guzmán
my sensei and I
advancing, retreating
a dojo danceKanjini Devi
junior doctors
thrown in at the deep end
second waveKaren Harvey
North Wales
Thomas Prowse
father/son flutemakers
who was better(19th century Prowse senior and junior were both flutemakers. Players
still compare and note differences in their flutes.)Kath Abela Wilson
Pasadena, California
tentative steps
from arms waving to
trembling gripKathleen Mazurowski
boys’ school alumni –
the moustache and beard
definingLakshmi Iyer
Kerala
blue mountains
the sea dunes –
driftingLemuel Waite
Georgetown, Kentucky
knitting lesson
the tangled lines
of gran’s handsLouise Hopewell
retirement –
my transformation
to a senior citizenMadhuri Pillai
ancestral home
grandpa’s face in the
old coconut treeManoj Sharma
Kathmandu, Nepal
graduation day…
already outgrown
his DadMargaret Mahony
genealogy…
generations
of name confusionMargaret Walker
la neve alta –
sulle impronte di mio padre,
i miei passi…deep snow –
on my father’s footprints,
my steps…Maria Teresa Piras
wishing for springtime
a weary old man
and his old dogMark Meyer
first day
master students give freshmen
a campus tourMaya Daneva
The Netherlands
windy clothesline
a baseball jersey
hugs grandma’s shawlMelanie Vance
Texas
heirloom recipe
my spices mingle
with grandma’sMichele L. Harvey
this parting…
from the old to the new
deciduous leavesMilan Rajkumar
Imphal, India
hand me down
his brother’s sweater
feels more warmMinal Sarosh
Ahmedabad, India
new boss
we call him
by his first nameMohammad Azim Khan
Peshawar Pakistan
family reunion…
patriarch still called
JuniorNancy Brady
Nana says
I’m having
a senior momentnancy liddle
Australia
senior junior
barrier breached
virtual realityNeena Singh
Chandigarh, India
young at heart –
he uses his thumbs
when texting his sonNick T
UK
old family house –
peeping at the rocking horse
in the nurseryNicole Pottier
France
family portrait
the special bonds
between generationsOlivier Schopfer
Switzerland
birthdays…
no longer marked
on the calendarPalle Krishna Rao
Chennai, India
rough edges
one generation’s
acceptancePat Davis
Pembroke, NH
father and son
boarding a carnival ride
tight grip on one fingerPaul Geiger
even at my age
still working on it
adultingPeggy Hale Bilbro
Huntsville, Alabama
glasses
on a child’s nose…
grandma peersPriti Aisola
India
dormitory cleaning…
freshers scrub
the toilet bowlsR.Suresh Babu
India
headmaster’s cane
silencing entire classRadhamani sarma
mobile app
my daughter
knows betterRajeshwari Srinivasan
India
exchanging bows
with the abbot
sharing a smileRehn Kovacic
20 years older
he stumbles over
her eulogyRoberta Beary
Co Mayo, Ireland
senior discount
on Tuesday matinees
save Junior MintsRon Scully
grandma Rosa Maria
smiles at me
from a pictureRosa Maria Di Salvatore
grampa and grandson
jump off the dock
togetherRuth Powell
Sunday morning
the little girl tries on
mother’s shoesSlobodan Pupovac
Zagreb, Croatia
senior moment
the glasses I search for
still on my headSusan Rogers
Los Angeles
uneven shadows
boy helps grandpa
cross the streetSushama Kapur
her absence –
somewhere in the room
bell-ring cricketTeiichi Suzuki
Japan
grandpa’s newspaper
full of duckling doodlesTeji Sethi
India
stopping to pee
his buoyant stream
my trickleTim Cremin
Andover, Massachusetts
a pilgrimage –
new faces and new flowers
along the wayTomislav Maretić
pecking order
the rooster’s feathers
as ruffled as his egoTracy Davidson
Warwickshire, UK
elderly couple
under an umbrella
cherry blossomTsanka Shishkova
Bulgaria
pink azaleas
her prom date is
a no showValentina Ranaldi-Adams
Fairlawn, Ohio
hint of storm
boss says that I should use
the office gymVandana Parashar
retirement home
a newborn cries
in the arms of the mothervincenzo adamo
new arrival
addition to family
a grandpaVishnu Kapoor
baka se igra
lutkama svoje unuke –
i nosi pelenegrandma is playing
with her granddaughter’s dolls –
and wears diapersZdenka Mlinar
Zagreb, Croatia
Lori Zajkowski is the Post Manager for Haiku Dialogue. A novice haiku poet, she lives in New York City.
Managing Editor Katherine Munro lives in Whitehorse, Yukon Territory, and publishes under the name kjmunro. She is Membership Secretary for Haiku Canada, and her debut poetry collection is contractions (Red Moon Press, 2019). Find her at: kjmunro1560.wordpress.com.
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