haiku now results

[H. Gene Murtha]

Traditional category:

John Hawkhead's poem "snowflakes falling,"
is this an example of a 5-7-5 haiku?   

[AlanSummers]

Dear Gene,

I'm giving the whole haiku and the weblink so that THF readers may consider:

snowflakes falling
on the child's upturned face
the stillness of stars

john hawkhead

http://www.thehaikufoundation.org/haikunow-awards-for-2013/

What is considered traditional haiku by HaikuNow! is here:
http://www.thehaikufoundation.org/haikunow-traditional-haiku/#trad_examples

Traditional category:

John Hawkhead's poem "snowflakes falling,"
is this an example of a 5-7-5 haiku?   

[H. Gene Murtha]

Yes, i am familiar with the THF's definition of a
traditional haiku, and very familiar with Paul
Mena's award winning poem.  I was curious
because i am reading a 4-6-5 syllable haiku:

snow/flakes fall/ing
on the child's up/turned face
the still/ness of stars

No doubt the enclosed poem is beautiful.

Thank you for your time Alan!

[cat]

Gene, I share your curiosity about this, because the guidelines in the Traditional Haiku category clearly state:

. . . the traditional approach to haiku in English—three lines, 5-7-5 syllables [emphasis added], with a caesura after the first line emphasized by a dash.

cat

[Don Baird]

snowflakes falling
on the child's upturned face
the stillness of stars

john hawkhead


While this haiku doesn't conform exactly with the 575 suggested meter, it is a beautiful example of a traditional haiku. It is missing the kire-ji but not a kire (imho). It is slightly off meter, but Basho frequented the idea of meter variance. He wrote to his student Biji, that if there is a forced choice between meter and content, the content is what counts (paraphrase, but an accurate interpretation from memory).

I think we should keep our eyes on the quality of the poems and not the exacting enforcement of rules. Each judge has a fair amount of "license" to pick the best haiku. That includes considering a variation to the rules/guides as Basho would also suggest.

I'm pondering a few ways to re-write the instructions so that it becomes clearer for next year's competition. I'll forward some ideas to Jim Kacian for consideration.

Thanks for bringing up your concerns, however. I know that it is extremely important to Jim, as it is to the contestants, to maintain the most appropriate and fair contest possible.

I'll keep you posted.

Blessings,

Don