The Haiku Foundation Forums

pond clouds
and cattail fluff
white on blue
                - Pat

blue ribbons
amongst the debris
New Year
               - Sue

the New Year
adding fresh vegetables
to yesterday's soup
               -Adelaide

soup stones?
they sell them now
in bookshops
               -Vida

HI John,

Difficult choice.

QuoteMonday bleeding down to money

Peter Yovu

a man in a crowd in a man

John Stevenson

I usually pick the haiku that brings me more questions and that I know I'll read again and again. This time I can say that about both poems.

When I read them the first time, these two haiku looked very different for me. Now I think they both place the needs of a person against the needs of the society. How much we lose and how much of us stays while among others.

In Peter's haiku, the man is lost to the money-making. He leaves at home all his dreams, needs, wishes, otherwise said: his individuality.

The man in John's haiku, I imagine is at a game or in a theater, he's with the crowd, part of the crowd, he is the crowd. Is there something left from his individuality at that moment?

I think I'll go with John's haiku, but as I said in the beginning, I like them both very much.

Best,
Vida

Happy Thanksgiving! :)

Last post, I promise! :)

I have a question actually. Does Scott's poem have anything to do with the Battle of Kosovo?
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Kosovo)

Kos does not mean robin but,
"Like America's harbinger of spring, the black bird called "kos" in Serbian language sings sweetly in the springtime and early summer.
For North Americans the feel of the Serbo-Croatian place name "Kosovo" can only be had from a free translation, "Field of Robins". (http://emperors-clothes.com/articles/JP%20maher/InAname.html) 

PS Chibi, I am sorry about the misprint of your name in the previous post!

Hi Chibi,

QuoteOddly the thing that throws me is a field of robins... robins being particullary territorial and do not flock as such or feed in groups... but then it could be in a large field... hmmm

The robins get in flocks sometimes. I have seen tens or even more of them "attacking" our backyard, them moving on to the next one. I haven't checked but it seems a lot like  some kind of migration. Usually there are a few blue jays  with them and one or two woodpeckers. This thing happens for a couple of days. Then, it's the usual few robins, that I suppose live close by during the whole year.

I am not trying to change your vote :). It's just a really beautiful sight. They move like a flock of kids on Halloween :)

Best,
Vida

The first one.

the word god being eaten by a field of robins

Scott Metz


It has religion, it has nature, it has seasons, it has change. It probably has everything, this is just my very first reading. It provokes questions and all kinds of images. The one that I really liked is the image of a Bible, torn apart in a wheat field and the birds  everywhere around it. But it could be simply a word god, written with seeds. Or the the idea that we are disassembling our religions, and there is nothing wrong with that- who can blame a robin for being hungry? :) 

Very rich poem!

best,
vida

*Edited to fix a typo.

October birthday
he makes a wish and starts
blowing leaves
                      ~Vida

leaves blowing
around her bare feet . . .
moonlit taxi rank
                      ~John

rank socks . . .
the smell of summer
at the laundromat
                       ~ Don

laundromat window-
one garbage bag falls
from the shopping cart
                      ~ Vida

dunkin' donuts
an obese pigeon loiters
by the door
                      ~John

door to door
under the waxing moon
a pumpkin
                     ~Don

pumpkins appear
on all the porches
orange October
                      ~Andy

October birthday
he makes a wish and starts
blowing leaves
                      ~Vida

Thanks for the encouragement, Alan, John!
That italic thing at the end of the post was not intentional. Sorry, I will try to fix it.

:)

Hi John,
thank you so much for starting this thread! I have been checking it every day.

Jack, Peter, nice to meet you :). It is my first shell game, so that should tell you how new I am to the haiku world. For a while, I was planning only to read here, but since nobody else commented these last few days, I got all my courage together and there it goes :)

QuoteOsiris
reconstructed
buttercups

Peggy Willis Lyles

Publication credit: Roadrunner issue X:2 (2010); Roadrunner 11.1
-February 2011 (Favourites from 2010)



wild roses
tarrying beside one
touched by time

Robert Spiess

Publication credits:
"wild roses": From "noddy," by Robert Spiess (Modern Haiku Press, 1997); selected for "The Red Moon Anthology," (Red Moon Press, 1997); selected for "Favorite Haiku" Vol. 3, H.F. Noyes (Red Moon Press, Pond Frog Editions, 2000)

I live in Georgia and the first thought in my mind when I read

Osiris
reconstructed
buttercups

was that Peggy Willis Lyles was talking about the King Tut Exhibition in Atlanta, 2009. It was a big thing. I could see her in my imagination (unfortunately, at the time I didn't even think about haiku), coming out of the exhibit and looking at the buttercups outside (it was in spring), and comparing them. The mighty Egyptians, dreaming of immortality and the fragile flowers.  
I think she picked reconstructed simply because that's what it is- a document, a monument, a mummy, if you want, but reconstructed, not brought back to life. The buttercups are alive though.
The other funny thing is that, there was a story about a mammoth, found well preserved with buttercups in his/her mouth:). Which, in my imagination, puts the flowers in Osiris' mouth and adds a new flavor to the haiku.
I like it very much.

wild roses
tarrying beside one
touched by time


I did not know Robert Spiess either. I have been reading his Speculations since this thread started which is not enough, I agree, but it helps.
I think it's a haiku that will stay, that one can read many times. In my reading, real roses are compared to one real rose, touched by time .They are not just hanging beside, the poet is asking why they don't age as this one and why they stay by it then. And I like touched by time. It doesn't mean withered (English in not my first language, maybe that's why:)) for me. It means just slightly more tired. One or two more wrinkles :)
Also, if I read it wild roses/tarrying beside one/...touched by time , all of the roses become touched by something bigger than them. Are they aging faster because they are staying with this one?

I have more questions about these roses, so I guess, my vote is for them.

Best,
Vida