As mentioned earlier, Taoism preaches finding and maintaining the balance in our lives. Though seldom found or maintained, it makes life a continual effort to experience it. This striving allows us to find the harmony between the two extremes and experience the full range, the sweet, the bitter, the happy, the sad – all that comprises life. If we write of the same topics, we have a tool to explore the greater gamut that is our life.
The Other Side of the Coin:
Haiku and the Harsh Realities
Peter Brady
World Haiku Review, August 2001
Peter Brady gives a very good argument why we as poets have a duty and responsibility and that sometimes "the images elicit anger, outrage, pathos, tears — a wider range of emotions than joy or calm or a nod of recognition at some pleasant memory."
The full range, the sweet, the bitter, the happy, the sad – all that comprises life, yet I often find that haiku writers shy away, or hide from, aspects of life, as if we must only talk of flowers, birds, bees and honey.
Here are three examples of Peter Brady's own haiku for the article:
roadkill
the wake of passing cars
ruffles its fur
cut-off
to the abandoned death camp
its rails still shiny
mum just dead
the neighbor's stereo
blaring
Other examples from the article:
Fleas, lice,
The horse pissing
Near my pillow
Basho [trans. R.H. Blyth]
evening—
wiping horse shit off his hand
with a mum
Issa [trans. David G. Lanoue]
the waiting
for the bombers
prolongs our night
Dragan J. Ristic
too early for sunrise
the horizon glows with the red
of burning villages
Ruzica Mokos
Croatia
"Takashi Nonin has described his own experiences in World War II"
dead quiet...
no signs of bombers -
going out for food
Two from me:
street attack -
I hold the young girl
through her convulsions
Alan Summers
1. World Haiku Review Vol 2: Issue 3 November 2002
WHCvanguard - Hard or "Real" Haiku
Vanguard Haiku Selected by Susumu Takiguchi
2. Short Stuff a journal of 'short form' poetry Ninth Issue Vol 2, Issue 1, January 2003
sultry evening
liquid from the take out bag
runs near the victim
Alan Summers
World Haiku Review VOLUME 2: ISSUE 3 NOVEMBER 2002
WHCvanguard - Hard or "Real" Haiku
Vanguard Haiku Selected by Susumu Takiguchi
Croatian war haiku that have inspired me with their harsh truths:
a cloud of dust
takes away the house with it
leaving the scream behind
Davor Cevanic
a foot in the mud
and under it
an autumn oak leaf
Vesna Skocir
the doll's eyes
blown out by a mine
replaced with sweets
Mirko Vidovic
baking in the oven
for a stray dog-
an old man's brain
Mirko Vidovic
This doesn't mean I go seeking these hard haiku, but I do want to be able and allowed to have a choice available, and it is the job of the poet not to hide or shy away from this responsibility.
I'll look forward to examples, preferably actual experience please.
Alan
one touch
again the child
pinned
Quote from: Sue on December 17, 2011, 07:54:42 AM
one touch
again the child
pinned
off topic-
would you be interested in starting some linked verse (through private messages, or some other form as to not take away from this thread), using your above as the opening verse?
I find is, for some reason, excellent and suited to renga.
Can do. Message me. What did you have in mind?
I find that Jack Galmitiz prompts a useful reply from paul m. aka Paul Miller which I have to concur with, as we are observers, and therefore a participant via poetry.
From Jack Galmitz's fascinating interview with paul m.
http://www.roadrunnerjournal.net/pages113/Discard_the_Dividing_Line.pdf
JG:
While it's not unprecedented in haiku, your inclusion of the darker side of nature-the struggle to survive, mortality-gives rise to the virtue of compassion in your work. Here are a few examples:
returning geese
her ashes still
in the plain tin
spring morning
flies return
to a crab carcass
pm:
I don't know that you can honestly interact with the world and not gain more compassion—either through the practice of poetry, the observation of animals, or simply shopping in a store.
I mentioned that the universe was a violent place on its own. I do see some poetry, haiku included, that seems to want to veer from that seeing, to only present the beautiful and uplifting, which I find false and a bit cowardly. The world is a complicated and messy place. If we are going to value honesty in poetry we need to represent all that we see.
Any thoughts from anyone?
Alan
大男おっちんじまって蚊もはらえねえ
The huge man, dead as a doornail – can't brush off the mosquitoes now
Haiku by Ginema
n.b. Ginema has been published in the haiku magazine Mononofukai since 1996. Ginema comes from a family where bloody things like murder and suicide have been unceasing, and this produced an environment ripe for "underground haiku".
-Haiku by Ginema translated by Eric Selland
Roadrunner 11.3
-December 2011-
http://www.roadrunnerjournal.net/
Christmas Eve
the girl still cuddles
a disabled doll
Urszula Wielanowska (Kielce, Poland)
(Mainichi Japan) December 24, 2011
This is interesting Alan. I think that there is a tendency to sentimentalize haiku, perhaps it is easier to be blunt in senryu. I find the 'cancer' verses (which are frequent winners in Kukai) particularly mawkish. There is nothing noble about cancer, it is more often than not smelly, ugly, protracted, and painful. Tragic it may be but to present it, or the relative at the bedside, as *nobly enduring* is usually very far from the truth. If we are to show the dark side of what-it-is-to-be-human may I make a plea for emotional honesty.
crows nest
taking up a bed
in St Jude's ward
longest night
hoping this breath
will be the last
not a breath
in the space between
death rattles
lavender oil added to the dressing tray
waves on shingle
her husband asks
how much longer
Sue
Hi Sue,
I don't know if you've read Jack's interview with Paul Miller but he is definitely one for emotional honesty.
Also another poet, Helen Buckingham, who has severe health issues, brings in this honesty, but with humour, and is never mawkish. It's possible she still has a few books to sell, but I do know that some people snap copies up for their friends and relatives.
Water on the Moon:
http://area17.blogspot.com/2010/06/water-on-moon-haiku-collection-by-helen.html
Taken from some of Colin Stewart Jone's review on NFTG (link given on Area 17):
QuoteThe major theme of Buckingham's year recorded in water on the moon is her illness. Pain is the catalyst for many of her poems which are also simply noted matter-of-fact which is in keeping with Buckingham's wry deadpan approach in her humour. As already quoted Alan Summers notes this in his introduction. Perhaps this quote expresses the sentiment even better:
'Humor is the instinct for taking pain playfully'Max Eastman
The illness remains unspecified and I have a deeper respect for the poet because of this. However, one can speculate as to the nature of the illness. Daffodils feature prominently in the Spring section just before the visits to the hospital:
early spring
the butcher
wears a daffodil
A wry comment on the carnivorous wearing a flower. However, the reader asks why is the butcher wearing a daffodil and why has the poet noticed it? The daffodil is symbolic of Wales and is used to celebrate St. David's Day. The daffodil is, however, also used as a symbol of cancer awareness.
Buckingham still manages to find a juxtaposition in what to most would be a distressing situation:
full moon...
the last
of the codeine
And though a challenge the poet seems up for the fight to regain her health:
tracing the contours
of my brain scan...
recalling past mountains
and again the wry humour:
stroke clinic the doctor's spirit level smile
This could have been written over three lines but the poet playfully highlights the level smile by placing the poem on one line.
results morning:
the mulberry tree
a deeper green
Merton College, Oxford, famously has a mulberry tree in its grounds and it is traditional for graduates to gather around and throw their mortar boards into the air in celebration. This haiku suggests that all exams were passed.
My wish is that Buckingham has great success with this book and that all results pertaining to her illness are favourable.
There are a lot of quality poetry collections, not just poems, about illness, that retain humour, despite an often desperate situation. As poets, should we shy away?
Alan
Quote from: Sue on December 28, 2011, 10:09:07 AM
This is interesting Alan. I think that there is a tendency to sentimentalize haiku, perhaps it is easier to be blunt in senryu. I find the 'cancer' verses (which are frequent winners in Kukai) particularly mawkish. There is nothing noble about cancer, it is more often than not smelly, ugly, protracted, and painful. Tragic it may be but to present it, or the relative at the bedside, as *nobly enduring* is usually very far from the truth. If we are to show the dark side of what-it-is-to-be-human may I make a plea for emotional honesty.
snip
Sue
I agree, we should make a plea for emotional honesty, whatever the subject matter.
We need to make sure we have moved on from Victorianesque attempts at poety, and keep poetry a valid mechanism for humanity, especially with the march of ebooks.
Alan
Quote from: Sue on December 28, 2011, 10:09:07 AM
This is interesting Alan. I think that there is a tendency to sentimentalize haiku, perhaps it is easier to be blunt in senryu. I find the 'cancer' verses (which are frequent winners in Kukai) particularly mawkish. There is nothing noble about cancer, it is more often than not smelly, ugly, protracted, and painful. Tragic it may be but to present it, or the relative at the bedside, as *nobly enduring* is usually very far from the truth. If we are to show the dark side of what-it-is-to-be-human may I make a plea for emotional honesty.
crows nest
taking up a bed
in St Jude's ward
longest night
hoping this breath
will be the last
not a breath
in the space between
death rattles
lavender oil added to the dressing tray
waves on shingle
her husband asks
how much longer
Sue
Quote from: Alan Summers on December 28, 2011, 11:39:13 AM
Hi Sue,
There are a lot of quality poetry collections, not just poems, about illness, that retain humour, despite an often desperate situation. As poets, should we shy away?
Alan
Absolutely not Alan. The ability to see the funny side of even the most desperate situations, to make humour out of tragedy with a carefully timed witty remark, is a beloved British tradition. Some of the best deaths I've been to were accompanied by laughter.
laying out the fat man
not big enough for a bow
last rites
he asks to be forgiven
for not standing up
a wake
filled with malapropisms
we couldn't tell before
Sue
Here are four haiku from Scott Metz that showcase other realities:
like
sho
ot
ing
fish
Gaza
only american deaths count the stars
my complete lack of patriotism full moon
the milky way . . .
we start to discuss
Pac-Man strategies
Quote from: Alan Summers on December 29, 2011, 06:49:36 AM
Here are four haiku from Scott Metz that showcase other realities:
like
sho
ot
ing
fish
Gaza
only american deaths count the stars
my complete lack of patriotism full moon
the milky way . . .
we start to discuss
Pac-Man strategies
What an excellent collection of political haiku those are Alan. I particularly liked the expansiveness of the pac-man haiku. It reflects on American popular culture as a sub-textual messages for interpersonal relationships and social approaches to 'other' (In this case - consume it /or outwit it /or kill it). It does it from a perspective which situates such small world concerns against a cosmic scale and so exposes their essential insignificance. The whole succeeds in carrying a lighthearted and playful awareness in an image of two people in an emotionally intimate relationship laying together on the grass at night, playing with the stars. Beautifully done.
I was also taken with "my complete lack of patriotism full moon" which has a similar effect in that it contrasts nationalist borders with the view from the moon, which recognises none. We are catapulted into space to view the earth as 'other'; which takes us beyond our nationalistic adherences into a cosmic consciousness point of view.
I have rarely seen these contrasts of scale done so well. Thank you for showing them.
Sue
waga oya no
shinuru toki ni mo
he o kokite
Even at the time
When my father lay dying
I still kept farting
Yamazaki Sōkan (山崎宗鑑) (1465–1553)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yamazaki_S%C5%8Dkan
Issa, in Donald Keene, World Within Walls (Grove Press, 1976) (p14)
...the poetic conceptions such as the verse [above] should not be condemned at all. It was precisely because Sokan as a great haikai master understood the gugen-like nature of haikai that he made every verse in his Inu Tsukuba shu a gugen.
P32 Chapter 1
Bashō and the Dao: the Zhuangzi and the transformation of Haikai:
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Basho-Dao-Zhuangzi-Transformation-Haikai/dp/0824828453
EDIT REASON: correct typo re master
I'm sure that's a very profound statement, but... what on earth did he say?
That's the hai in haiku. The Japanese language is deliberately oblique yet filled with amazing humour. ;-)
Alan
Quote from: Sue on December 30, 2011, 07:24:48 PM
I'm sure that's a very profound statement, but... what on earth did he say?
Really? So is this an in-joke only for those who speak Japanese?
or can we ordinary mortals share in it?
I believe the translation is very inclusive, but generally speaking we aren't as up to speed on gugen and honkadori as the classic Japanese haikai experts were.
Here's an article that might be interesting:
http://www.haijinx.org/I-1/articles/yuasa-p1.html
Alan
who is this 'we'?
if what you mean is 'sub-textual alternative readings', a 'message', and 'allusion' then I personally use them all the time. As do many others. I have even been known, on occasion, to use so-called "vulgar language". This POV which you seem to be espousing seems to be stuck in a narrow and elitist rather tidy little view of haiku, Alan.
There is nothing intrinsically valuable about using the word 'fart' in a haiku, or any other word considered 'vulgar'. Unless of course it is there merely for its shock value ...which may have some contextual value. It is an honest enough word. Issa uses it well. However, in England only pre-adolescent boys find such words inherently funny. On the wit-scale poems about poopy pants score very low on my scales. But here, I can't find the ones I did a few months ago but I'll rattle a few off for you....
sweeping
the fallen leaves
pissing into the wind
Father Ted
dead
feck fecking feck
the Queen
did her family all fart
to the speech?
Sue
Few of us aka we, including modern Japanese writers/readers, as well as Western writers/readers are familiar in depth as the Classic Japanese writers and readers. For various reasons including the fact they weren't distracted by modern contrivances.
My statements aren't about farting, but what can be perceived as non-poetical subjects in general.
This is a post to showcase them.
Alan
Some recent haiku aka vanguard haiku, and some famous ones from the past:
his twin
lost in battle, the pain
of a phantom limb
André Surridge
World Haiku Review
Haiku 3, January 2011
Vanguard Haiku
Honourable Mention
a black-yellow moth...
on the wall of our home, the day
after my sister-in-law died
Natsumi Kosuge
World Haiku Review
Haiku 1, August 2011
Honourable Mention
first snow
I no longer have a child
to measure its depth
Melissa Allen
World Haiku Review
Zatsuei (Haiku of Merit)
Haiku 1, January 2011
in the woods
a christmas wreath
turns brown
Joseph M. Kusmiss
World Haiku Review
Zatsuei (Haiku of Merit)
Haiku 1, January 2011
And well worth a revisit:
http://www.thehaikufoundation.org/2010/02/10/viral-5-6/
鮟鱇の骨まで凍ててぶちきらる
ankō-no hone-made itete buchikiraru
the anglerfish frozen
right down to its very bones
is hacked to pieces
—Katō Shūson (1905–1993)
(translated by Dhugal J. Lindsay)
the sack of kittens
sinking in the icy creek
increases the cold
Nick Virgilio, Haiku West 1.1, 1967
red flipped out
chicken lung
in a cold white sink
Anita Virgil, A 2nd Flake, 1974
turned earth
the splayed ribcage
of a March hare
John Barlow, Frogpond 30.3, 2007
From today's Per Diem:
the twists
in old coyote shit
Autumn wind
-- Burnell Lippy
pissing ...
in the wind
a light mist
Per Diem: Daily Haiku
morning sun—
fish scales glisten
in the otter scat
- H. Gene Murtha
Otters, and otter scat:
http://www.bear-tracker.com/otter.html
What an interesting discussion!
If I may return to this,
Quotewaga oya no
shinuru toki ni mo
he o kokite
Even at the time
When my father lay dying
I still kept farting
I don't think the poet is being funny, or vulgar, or overly philosophical. Now, I don't know much about the Japanese culture, and I may be wrong in my understanding.
He compares two events, one seems to be huge- a death, the other- very small. But they are not so different. We have no control over any of them. They happen independently of what we do or what we wish.
The poet does not mean disrespect to his dying father, he just had a bad meal, or he has a bad stomach. His father does not die in purpose, it's his time. We can postpone, or try our best to fix each of this events, but neither our bodily functions nor our death are our servants. :)
What I got from the poem is that we don't have to consider any event too big or too small. They are equally important and unimportant.
I think the poem is genius :). If I have understood it right ;)
Best,
Vida
PS I really enjoyed all poems!
Dear Vida, many thanks for your close reading.
Vida, wonderful insight.
Andy
It may just be me, but I find this haiku incredibly moving and sad . . .
a crow pecks
at something small and still . . .
autumn dunes
Peggy Heinrich, published in The Heron's Nest, volume XIII, #3, 2011.
warmest,
John
Both frozen butterfly and butterfly in my memory lack their wings
Hashimoto Takako
(One Hundred Frogs, Hiroaki Sato)
too early for sunrise
the horizon glows with the red
of burning villages
This ku wowed me!
Amazing.
Thank you for posting these great examples, Alan :)
Do you by any chance know where i would be able to purchase a collection like this?
I would be very interested.
Do you have any of your haiku to share, as you mentioned they touch on the darker moments?
The book which I have somewhere in my library is:
Haiku Iz Rata: War Haiku, second edition. Marijan Čekolj, editor. Croatian Haiku Society, Smerovišće 24, 41430 Samobor, Croatia, 1995, 80 pages, 8 x 5½ inches, paperback, perfectbound. In Croatian and English.
If you particularly like war haiku, then check out this list:
http://war-haiku.tempslibres.org/biblio.html
Alan
Quote from: Chase F on July 30, 2012, 09:47:21 PM
too early for sunrise
the horizon glows with the red
of burning villages
This ku wowed me!
Amazing.
Thank you for posting these great examples, Alan :)
Do you by any chance know where i would be able to purchase a collection like this?
I would be very interested.
Alan,
I don't want to start a new topic, hope this allows me to tag onto it.
I had previously read most of this thread, but did not quite get it.
Now I think I do.
Reaching back to one of the threads in the index...
-------------
Re: weeding
« Reply #6 on: Today at 07:13:45 AM »
Quote
Hi Jan,
Did you mean hadaka? Removing things so other things can be more clearly seen?
Alan
-------------
As I was earlier this year preparing for the IAFOR 2016 Contest, I read the IAFOR 2015 winners, Commended and Runner's Up.
In it I found these haiku/hybrid that I think may be examples of Hadaka.
Can you correct me if I'm still "off"? In these examples?
1.
Jim Kacian
Runner's Up
the shadow of the fish
hides
in the shadow of a leaf
2. (I still don't see the image in this one, but think it may be Hadaka)
Dusan Mijajlovic
Commended
a shirt hung
on the birch tree branch
a man in its shadow
3.
Milan Dragovic
Runner's Up
summer night ...
a worm bites through the silence
in a fallen acorn
4. (Just curious if this also fits)
Eduard Tara
Commended
rustling pages--
in the library the echo
of the past forests
5.
And the winner
Boris Nazansky
pregnancy
shape of the dark side
of the crescent moon
Thanks for your kind response.
Jan in Texas
Just popping in briefly. :)
I'd say it's the underbelly that some like to avoid in their poetry, as per examples previously. Examples you have given do have a clarity of language, with no ambivalence perhaps?
re:
Eduard Tara
Commended
rustling pages--
in the library the echo
of the past forests
He's certainly a haiku poet to read, and uses sound in the first line to make the second part much more than a statement. We have torn down original forests and ancient woodlands, perhaps Britain is the worst modern example, and the Roman Empire may have been mostly responsible for huge swathes of Africa being denuded of forest. At one time the planet was one big forest alongside bodies of water, now cities are replacing much of that original mono-forest.
It's a wonderful haiku and perhaps the strongest of the batch you presented?
re:
summer night ...
a worm bites through the silence
in a fallen acorn
Milan Dragovic
This is from/alluding to Basho's famous Autumn/Fall chestnut haikai verse:
夜ル竊ニ虫は月下の栗を穿ツ
Basho
Romanised Japanese:
yoru hisoka ni mushi wa gekka no kuri o ugatsu
night . . . silently
in the moonlight, a worm
digs into a chestnut
Trans. Ueda, Makoto
autumn moonlight —
a worm digs silently
into the chestnut
Trans. Robert Hass
kind regards,
Alan
Alan:
Thanks.
Pithy statement you open with. Will ponder it for some time.
Will Look for some more Tara perhaps on LHA, and online too.
Thanks for your time.
Jan Benson
--------------------------------------
Just popping in briefly. :)
I'd say it's the underbelly that some like to avoid in their poetry, as per examples previously. Examples you have given do have a clarity of language, with no ambivalence perhaps?
re:
Eduard Tara
Commended
rustling pages--
in the library the echo
of the past forests
He's certainly a haiku poet to read, and uses sound in the first line to make the second part much more than a statement. We have torn down original forests and ancient woodlands, perhaps Britain is the worst modern example, and the Roman Empire may have been mostly responsible for huge swathes of Africa being denuded of forest. At one time the planet was one big forest alongside bodies of water, now cities are replacing much of that original mono-forest.
It's a wonderful haiku and perhaps the strongest of the batch you presented? ...
Hi Jan,
The examples you gave were strong ones for haiku, but as you will see in the examples in the article I quote from Peter Brady, and many subsequent examples, it's a parallel stream of existence that is touched on, the less poetic side of life.
Another good example of this kind of work can be found in Brendan Slater's personal collections In Bed with Kerouac and Rum, Sodomy and the Wash: http://www.yettobenamedfreepress.org/p/flip-books.html
And:
c.2.2. Anthology of Short Verse
Editors: Brendan Slater & Alan Summers
Introduction: Sonam Chhoki
http://www.amazon.com/dp/1479304565
The latter is both haiku and other short verse: "tackling themes such as loss of identity, poverty, racism, homelessness, unsentimental love, crime, punishment, in short, real life. Each poet is identified by a pen-name, there are no frills, lavender or lace in these pages, just honest, gritty and experimental verse that will hopefully make the reader sit up and take notice, get inspired and rethink the role of short-verse in not only the poetry world but also in society which is after all both subject and audience."
All anonymous names, and even Brendan does not know the identity of one author whom I know, and still cannot reveal to this day.
re Eduard Tara:
http://www.thehaikufoundation.org/2014/03/18/haikunow-2013-eduard-tara/
re his favourite haiku, I can say that although David Cobb's haiku alludes to Buson's famous comb/dead wife fictive piece, his piece is very much true, and Karen and myself knew David Cobb's wife and still very much miss. She died so suddenly, she was always full of light at British Haiku Society haiku events.
http://www.poetrysociety.org.nz/tarafavourites
Also he is a champion of non-English language haiku, which we need to know more about, as Brazil, he states has been writing haiku longer than in America and other English-writing/speaking countries:
http://simplyhaiku.theartofhaiku.com/autumn2010/eduardtarainterview.htm
Alan
Alan
I had already tracked down most of the Tara you list, but the last on his interview ...
But on one other site , I think the one he lists his fav haiku, he mentions being published in many languages, and predominantly 5/7/5. but acknowledges the progressive haiku in ELH.
I found the Cobb haiku my fav of his favs.
I also asked to be on his f/b as a friend, and explored his choices in music. Some of that is transporting in itself.
Took advantage of those free downloads, pdf files, and saw one of Bjerg's as well that I don't have yet.
Let me read those to see if they help me better understand Hadaka, before I set my credit card to any links...
But that Sonam wrote the intro to c.2.2. makes it very tempting.
;-)
Thanks again Alan
Jan
Just bought c.2.2. New on Amazon.
Shipper is in the US.
--------------
And, it hit me that the 2016 Winner of IAFOR, was also a hadaka contender. .. you were judge of that round.
So, now making notes on that batch of ku searching for hadaka examples... which I will keep to myself.
sunny afternoon
a shadow
on the mammogram
Suraja Roychowdhury,
United States
re Suraja Roychowdhury's haiku, she actually won both my Conference Theme of Justice section, where others baulked at that theme, and was also the GRAND PRIZE WINNER, which was an interesting and gratifying result: http://iaforhaikuaward.org/full-list-of-winners-the-iafor-vladimir-devide-haiku-award-2016/
I looked her up when the results were announced and she works in the medical area where she meets hundreds of women having mammograms, so that's where the authencity came through:
sunny afternoon
a shadow
on the mammogram
As a judge I look at every entry many many times and even early favourites are given a hard time, a tough time, and no quick route to the short list.
This haiku stayed in my long list each time, and in the short list that was still considerably long, until the final short list, where it not only stayed but gained a momentum, so it went through stronger tests as there were other contenders, but it just kept coming back and nudging ahead.
I would say its strongest feature, one of them, I'll say more in the book, is the use and power of juxtaposition, and literal use of light and shade.
Yes, it could go into the hadaka classification because people go through these checks and balances everyday, the ones that are not glamourous, and make incredibly tough and painful choices in our lifestyles away from the mainstream existences, and right now we all know one or more people who are going through them.
Quote from: Jan in Texas on May 18, 2016, 05:51:05 PM
Just bought c.2.2. New on Amazon.
Shipper is in the US.
--------------
And, it hit me that the 2016 Winner of IAFOR, was also a hadaka contender. .. you were judge of that round.
So, now making notes on that batch of ku searching for hadaka examples... which I will keep to myself.
sunny afternoon
a shadow
on the mammogram
Suraja Roychowdhury,
United States
Quote from: Alan Summers on December 28, 2011, 07:06:31 AM
I find that Jack Galmitiz prompts a useful reply from paul m. aka Paul Miller which I have to concur with, as we are observers, and therefore a participant via poetry.
From Jack Galmitz's fascinating interview with paul m.
http://www.roadrunnerjournal.net/pages113/Discard_the_Dividing_Line.pdf
JG:
While it's not unprecedented in haiku, your inclusion of the darker side of nature-the struggle to survive, mortality-gives rise to the virtue of compassion in your work. Here are a few examples:
returning geese
her ashes still
in the plain tin
spring morning
flies return
to a crab carcass
pm:
I don't know that you can honestly interact with the world and not gain more compassion—either through the practice of poetry, the observation of animals, or simply shopping in a store.
I mentioned that the universe was a violent place on its own. I do see some poetry, haiku included, that seems to want to veer from that seeing, to only present the beautiful and uplifting, which I find false and a bit cowardly. The world is a complicated and messy place. If we are going to value honesty in poetry we need to represent all that we see.
Any thoughts from anyone?
Alan
QuoteAny thoughts from anyone?
Alan
ah yes, I think I agree with paul m.
I just found this thread. I really should get out more.
In reading through the thread something immediately came to mind. An all too common scene 'round these parts.
red dawn
the highway stained
with a life drained out
Yes, there's a lot of roadkill out there, and sometimes it's human. One of my step-relatives narrowly avoided being killed on the road just a week ago.
Oddly I haven't used the color red for any of my 'hadaka' haiku but yellow I associate with the dark raw side of life:
Monday's magician of yellow colour of murder
[monostich]
Alan Summers
Publication Credits: Does Fish-God Know (YTBN Press 2012)
girl in an owl
a human gun for yellow
Alan Summers
c.2.2. Anthology of short-verse ed. Brendan Slater & Alan Summers
(Yet To Be Named Free Press 2013)
Haibun:Windsor & Newton receive a small parcel
of gamboge from their South-East Asian suppliers:
they usually grind it up carefully and sell in tubes,
one of their more expensive watercolours.
This one contains exploded bullets.
There's five of them displayed in their office now.
It might have been the Vietnam War,
or the horrors of the Pol Pot regime,
a soldier, or a group of soldiers, entered a garcinia grove
and sprayed bullets around the area with machine guns.
Some of them lodged safely in the bamboo,
to be found months, years later, by paint-makers
in Harrow.
There are landmines in that grove now
where the trees bleed in slow sunshine.
Whatever happened to the other bullets
can only be imagined,
but there's a nine year old boy who limps,
as he catches a train,
in a man's body.
this reluctant bird
another bright eye day
for the both of us
n.b. (for readers) Gamboge is a deep tone of saffron for painting, and other uses such as Buddhist robes.
pub. Blithe Spirit Vol. 25 issue 2 (2015)
anthology: Journeys 2015, World Haibun Anthology ed. Angelee Deodhar
Quote from: justlikeyou on July 12, 2016, 09:02:47 AM
I just found this thread. I really should get out more.
In reading through the thread something immediately came to mind. An all too common scene 'round these parts.
red dawn
the highway stained
with a life drained out
Love the way you wrote this:
but there's a nine year old boy who limps,
as he catches a train,
in a man's body.
Yellow is an interesting choice to illustrate the dark side. To me, after white, it represents a higher goodness. But we each bring our own color scheme to life and it's all good.
I used red because that is the actual color. If it was a deer, moose or bear it can sometimes be quite a large stain crossing several travel lanes.
Quote from: Alan Summers on July 12, 2016, 10:58:43 AM
Yes, there's a lot of roadkill out there, and sometimes it's human. One of my step-relatives narrowly avoided being killed on the road just a week ago.
Oddly I haven't used the color red for any of my 'hadaka' haiku but yellow I associate with the dark raw side of life:
Monday's magician of yellow colour of murder
[monostich]
Alan Summers
Publication Credits: Does Fish-God Know (YTBN Press 2012)
girl in an owl
a human gun for yellow
Alan Summers
c.2.2. Anthology of short-verse ed. Brendan Slater & Alan Summers
(Yet To Be Named Free Press 2013)
Haibun:
Windsor & Newton receive a small parcel
of gamboge from their South-East Asian suppliers:
they usually grind it up carefully and sell in tubes,
one of their more expensive watercolours.
This one contains exploded bullets.
There's five of them displayed in their office now.
It might have been the Vietnam War,
or the horrors of the Pol Pot regime,
a soldier, or a group of soldiers, entered a garcinia grove
and sprayed bullets around the area with machine guns.
Some of them lodged safely in the bamboo,
to be found months, years later, by paint-makers
in Harrow.
There are landmines in that grove now
where the trees bleed in slow sunshine.
Whatever happened to the other bullets
can only be imagined,
but there's a nine year old boy who limps,
as he catches a train,
in a man's body.
this reluctant bird
another bright eye day
for the both of us
n.b. (for readers) Gamboge is a deep tone of saffron for painting, and other uses such as Buddhist robes.
pub. Blithe Spirit Vol. 25 issue 2 (2015)
anthology: Journeys 2015, World Haibun Anthology ed. Angelee Deodhar
Quote from: justlikeyou on July 12, 2016, 09:02:47 AM
I just found this thread. I really should get out more.
In reading through the thread something immediately came to mind. An all too common scene 'round these parts.
red dawn
the highway stained
with a life drained out
Yellow can be an uplifting color and one of my favourite colors, but sometimes...
Currently prisoners are clothed in a standard issue prison uniform, except for dangerous criminals, who wear yellow and green boiler suits. Prison uniforms in the United States often consist of a distinctive orange or yellow jumpsuit or two piece surgical scrub set to make escape more difficult, as it is difficult for an escaped inmate to avoid recognition and recapture in such a distinctive attire.: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prison_uniform
Blue is an almost universally liked color (whereas yellow and brown, for example, are much less popular). That's true everywhere, except in the few places where blue is most strongly associated with death and mourning (e.g., parts of East Asia).http://munsell.com/color-blog/drunk-tank-pink-adam-alter/
Yellow tends to cause more eye fatigue than any other color. It increases metabolism and upsets babies. People also tend to lose their temper more often in yellow rooms. Yellow often makes many people feel cheerful, energetic, and happy.
http://www.demesne.info/Improve-Your-Home/Choosing-Interior-Color.htm
Yellow makes babies cry:http://www.medicaldaily.com/color-psychology-10-ways-colors-trick-you-every-day-295460
The Yellow Wallpaper
https://msu.edu/~fellow17/wra210/final/Research%20Paper%20-%20Charlotte%20Perkins%20Gilman.pdf
Yes, blood appears red due to oxidisation when exposed to air, but is blue.
Quote from: justlikeyou on July 12, 2016, 11:33:56 AM
Love the way you wrote this:
but there's a nine year old boy who limps,
as he catches a train,
in a man's body.
Yellow is an interesting choice to illustrate the dark side. To me, after white, it represents a higher goodness. But we each bring our own color scheme to life and it's all good.
I used red because that is the actual color. If it was a deer, moose or bear it can sometimes be quite a large stain crossing several travel lanes.