A Sense of Place: MOUNTAIN – sight
A Sense of Place
In his essay ‘So:ba’, given at the International Haiku Conference (SUNY Plattsburgh, NY, 2008) and published serially in Frogpond, Jim Kacian discusses the concept of ba:
“If you look up ba in any Japanese-English Dictionary you’ll find it means “place” or “site” or “occasion”. And these are all true in the most general sense—ba is a pointer to a kind of awareness that something of importance is happening in time and space.”
So here we are…
In the following weeks we will get back to haiku basics and explore specific locations with an emphasis on the senses, and with the intention of improving our own haiku practice. Ideally, participants will select an actual location that they can visit, or a location from memory that they have visited in the past. Failing that, we always have our imaginations – and you’re invited to join in the fun! Submit an original unpublished poem (or poems) via our Contact Form by Sunday midnight on the theme of the week, including your name as you would like it to appear, and place of residence. I will select from these for the column, and add commentary.
next week’s theme: MOUNTAIN – hearing
Stay in the mountains and listen… what do you hear?
I look forward to reading your submissions.
A Sense of Place: MOUNTAIN – sight
mountain top
I look down
at my fearsBlessed Ayeyame
Ughelli, Nigeria
Many of us can relate to the idea of a fear of heights, or a fear of falling… where the words are ‘look down at’, the reader, celebrating at the summit, may also read ‘look down on’, and this gives another layer of meaning to the poem…
ice cold
mountain spring
the dipper hangs aboveMargaret Walker
Lincoln, NE, USA
In this poem, ‘the dipper’ may refer to a utensil used to actually scoop water from the spring or to a constellation in the sky overhead…
graveside birthday
I watch the balloons
soar to the mountaintopSari Grandstaff
Saugerties, NY, USA
An unexpected take on the theme this week – again, the emphasis on such detailed information in so few words helps to bring the reader into the experience… a sadness that also becomes uplifting…
semester abroad
the foothills
unravel before meTia Haynes
Lakewood, Ohio
Here the poet presents the mountain scene viewed through the lens of travel, where the reader can imagine seeing this for the first time…
Here are the rest of my selections for this week:
the great mountain
majestic pose
erupts anytime(Mount Agung/Great in Bali is currently on the boil at level three warning)
AJ. Anwar
Jakarta, Indonesia
snake…
a train through
the mountainsAdjei Agyei-Baah
Kumasi, Ghana
mountain-lookout size is distance
Adrian Bouter
Atlas Mountains
the snow-capped peaks
in every sunriseAlan Summers
Marrakech, Morocco
mountain peak
an unbroken view
of pinks and bluesAmy Baranski
Burien, Washington
Snowdon
a 360 degree view
of mistAndrew Shimield
stepping over
a small piece of sky
mountain violetAndy McLellan
the first star –
behind the mountains the moon
peeks outAngela Giordano
white clouds –
they come and go
shadows
on the mountainAngiola Inglese
mountain road –
the rounded arch
of a rainbowAnna Maria Domburg –Sancristoforo
in the mountain
a lost field note
sawtooth sketchesAnthony Rabang
sunrise mountain
a silhouette
wreathed in fireArdelle Hollis Ray
Las Vegas, NV
the sun going down
beyond a cliff –
the way you left mearvinder kaur
Chandigarh, India
mountain welcome
wildflowers line up
along the roadBarbara Kaufmann
NY
harvest moon
the old dog and I walk
the ridge-top trailBarbara Tate
pink sky
along mountain trails
my journey haltsBasantkumar Das
where the heavens
touch the peaks –
a solitary crowBob Whitmire
Round Pond, Maine
mountain pass
a winding road
follows nature’s pathBona M. Santos
Los Angeles, CA
scaling
Olympus Mons
by lensC.R. Harper
dawn lit mountain…
patchwork greens
flecked with sheepcarol jones
Wales
sleeping bags
inside a dome of stars
mountain journeyCarol Raisfeld
snow capped mountain
at its foot
petals on the windcezar ciobika
see the Matterhorn
from the inside
Disneyland rideCharles Harmon
Los Angeles, California, USA
snow capped Zermatt
bride waves
from the horse buggyChristina Chin
Kuching, Sarawak
contemplating
the bleakness of the sky
search and rescueChristina Sng
purple heather
on my mountain
and the next and the…Christine Eales
UK
facebook posts
the mountains I wish to see
with my own eyesClaire Vogel Camargo
another warm summer
above the tree-line
a spruce seedlingCorine Timmer
Pilot Mountain
looking down on the backs
of circling vulturesCraig Kittner
Wilmington, NC
beneath the great wave
waiting to exhale
Fujidl mattila
usa
Beneath the forest of thistles
a mountain chain
of molehillsDavid Gale
Gloucester UK
mountain air
the phone user gestures
to infinityDavid Jacobs
London, UK
Mount Fuji
our one time passing
only cloudsDavid Oates
in the shadow
of the mountain
a pool of pebblesDebbi Antebi
London, UK
mountain peaks the black holes between constellations
Debbie Strange
Canada
glaciers
on the mountain
that look you gave meDeborah P Kolodji
Temple City, California
(writing from Great Basin National Park, Nevada)
mid-spring
far below peaks and glaciers
creeping myrtleDevin Harrison
in snowy pines
midway up the mountainside
a lone elk standsdianne moritz
through the almond
blossom snow glitters from
the mountain peaksDubravka Šcukanec
Zagreb, Croatia
milky way
the stars frame
even the mountainsEufemia Griffo
stately evergreens
hold up clusters of
alabaster cloudsGiedra Kregzdys
Woodhaven, NY
moon over the peak –
that curvy road
leading homeGiovanna Restuccia
Italy
twilight
on Mauna Kea
a pueo soars(Mauna Kea is one of the five volcanoes forming the Big Island of Hawaii. Measured from its base in the sea, Mauna Kea is the tallest mountain in the world. A pueo is a short eared owl endemic to Hawaii.)
Greer Woodward
Waimea, Hawaii
top of the mount
blood washed mist
veiling the eaglesGuliz Mutlu
Mount Nimrod, Turkey
clouds of smoke
across the river
a mountain villageHifsa Ashraf
Pakistan
mountain after mountain
into the distance
diminishing bluesIngrid Baluchi
mountaintop –
the city folded
into glimpsesIsabel Caves
Auckland, New Zealand
the memories
that carry us
mountain streamJoan Prefontaine
Karakoram pass
right next to my shoe
this tiny flowerJoanne van Helvoort
the mountain’s silhouette
fades into darkness –
I turn off the newsJohn S Green
Bellingham, Washington
pearlescent light
through the mountain pass
a curtain of starsJohn Hawkhead
In the distance
a condor flying…
The snowy peaks of the AndesJulia Guzmán
cloud cover
I learn patience
from Mt FujiKath Abela Wilson
our travels in Asia from California
Early morning mist
covers mountain
challengeKathleen Mazurowski
Chicago, IL
scattering mom’s ashes
on Mt. San Gorgonio
alpenglowKimberly Esser
Los Angeles
chopped powder
body prints connect
on the beginner slopeLamart Cooper
Blue Ridge
even in darkness,
twilightLaurie Greer
Washington, D.C.
green peak –
recognizing my house
on the horizonLeonardo Lazzari
Italy
halfway up –
how smug the smiling faces
when they’re halfway downLisa Cherrett
Wiltshire, UK
cloud shadows
the mountains
a deeper shade of greenLori Zajkowski
Atop Delphi –
looking for signs
like they didLorraine Schein
NY
rock walls…
yet flowers bloom
everywhere I lookmuri di roccia … eppure spuntano fiori /ovunque guardo
Lucia Cardillo
old hut
emptiness echoes
through the mountainsLucy Whitehead
Essex, UK
distant mountain its all pervading presence
Madhuri Pillai
birthday party –
ever higher on my mountain
the border of lightMargherita Petriccione
above the tree line
the raven spots
a distant smoke columnMargo Williams
Stayton, Oregon
mauve shadows
cross a hillside
wild lupinMarietta McGregor
my little capful
from a pikes peak stream
fool’s goldMarilyn Appl Walker
Mourne mountains
the deep hues of heathers
all around(Mourne mountains in Northern Ireland)
Marina Bellini
dormant volcano
a cloud
dawdlesMark Gilbert
twin peaks
at the fingertips
her breast’s scarMarta Chocilowska
purple mountain
a dab of sunset
left overMartha Magenta
England, UK
Road through the mountain –
always night’s
artificial lightmichael ceraolo
South Euclid, Ohio
Zabriskie Point
shadows undulate from
the artist’s paletteMichael Henry Lee
Saint Augustine Florida
Horse Mountain
old pine trees make way
for cell towersMichael H. Lester
Los Angeles CA USA
mountain hike
from the clouds into the valley
a red kite(As there aren’t any real mountains in The Netherlands, this one is from memory of a vacation in Italy and Austria.)
Michael Smeer
Haarlemmermeer, The Netherlands
mountain top
the windmill’s blade
burnishing the moonMike Gallagher
County Kerry, Ireland
on the mountain edge
the silhouette of
a mountain goatMohammad Azim Khan
Pakistan
late summer wedding
Grand Teton veiled
in clouds and snowNancy Brady
Huron, Ohio, USA
Mount Fuji
on the calendar cover…
next lifetime plansNatalia Kuznetsova
Russia
sprouting out
from a crack in the rock
edelweissOlivier Schopfer
Geneva, Switzerland
halfway to the summit
my litter bag
still emptyPat Davis
Pembroke NH USA
Fuji-san flashes by
our mouths agape
on the bullet trainPauline O’Carolan
hungry cardinal chicks
one red feather drifts down
mountain fogPeggy Bilbro
Huntsville, Alabama
above the fog –
a few faded blue islands
moored to the valleyPhilip Whitley
the vanishing point
of an eagle’s flight
alpenglowPolona Oblak
mountain cabin
close enough to the stars
for wishes to reachPris Campbell
mountain trail
the length
of this blisterRachel Sutcliffe
snowy peak
shivering mantra
on my lipsRadhamani Sarma
Chennai, India
mountain view
all the colors
still not named by Pantone*(*Pantone LLC is a U.S. corporation best known for its Pantone Matching System (PMS), a proprietary color space used in a variety of industries, primarily printing, though sometimes in the manufacture of colored paint, fabric, and plastics.)
Radostina Dragostinova
sight seeing
only memories through
the mountain’s fogRamlawt Dinpuia
into the fog
out of the fog
mountain highwayRandy Brooks
dust storm
where the mountain
used to beRehn Kovacic
over the mountains
a rainbow
stretching its wingsRéka Nyitrai
mountain gorge –
a cougar enters
the viewfinderRoberta Beary
County Mayo Ireland
red-tile roof –
creeping fog obscures
the swiss alpsrobyn brooks
usa
mountain top
looking right out
of myselfRon C. Moss
Tasmania, Australia
topological map
unfolds flat the ridge trail –
creases peak to peakron scully
the Black Hills
light up at night
milky wayRonald K. Craig
Batavia, OH USA
Mount Etna –
the blue colour
of a little lakeRosa Maria Di Salvatore
morning valley
the top of the mountain
looks out of the mistSerhiy Shpychenko
Kyiv, Ukraine
dusk comes
to the mountains
bats and
dip diveshandon land
between hasaki and hamon
the rocky mountainssimonj
UK
eagle’s nest
the way the mountain slopes
into the darkSkaidrite Stelzer
Toledo, Ohio
early morning
a look down
at the sunSlobodan Pupovac
Zagreb, Croatia
older now
the mountain
in my viewStephen A. Peters
mountain chapel
wiping off the dust I read
my mother’s nameSusan Rogers
Los Angeles, CA, USA
sunset
shadows sliding
off the mountain’s faceTerri French
all day climbing…
from summer to
springTsanka Shishkova
cloudless sky –
twin peaks form
the letter MValentina Ranaldi-Adams
Fairlawn, Ohio USA
vacation
getting bigger with each mile
the mountain and our smileVandana Parashar
floating
on the sea
a fire-breathing mountainVictor Ortiz
Bellingham, WA
mountain path
who says I cannot walk
over cloudsVishnu Kapoor
Overlook Mountain –
I climb the fire tower
to look for my homeWill Nixon
lava trail
selfies are clear enough
from the mountainWillie Bongcaron
Katherine Munro lives in Whitehorse, Yukon Territory, and publishes under the name kjmunro. She is Membership Secretary for Haiku Canada and an Associate Member of the League of Canadian Poets. She recently co-edited an anthology of crime-themed haiku called Body of Evidence: a collection of killer ’ku.
This Post Has 93 Comments
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Thank you for some other informative site. Where else could I get that kind of info written in such an ideal approach?
I have a venture that I am simply now operating on, and I’ve
been on the glance out for such information.
Up to the mountain-
the sound of my breathing
in the emptiness
Wow, what a selection, so beautiful and deep. Thank you so much, KJ, for including mine. And Alan Summers, for that ‘extra gift’. I am honored to be among you all dear friends. Awesome!
Dear AJ Anwar, thank you! 🙂
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Surprise after surprise opened up to me as I journeyed to each and every haiku and found an extra golden nugget ‘half-buried’ to further appreciate the whole poem all over again.
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I loved this line within a line I found from you! 🙂
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“the great mountain majestic pose” by AJ. Anwar
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Thanks again to Kathy, where the wonderful and numerous comments would not have happened. It’s really exciting to check every day who else and what else has been added to the comments! 🙂
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Gosh, for a relative newcomer to this genre, there’s just so much to learn! (Why was I waffling along half a century ago?!)
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Kathy, thank you for providing such an opportunity, and to both you and Alan for a wonderful learning experience through your weekly comments.
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It seems to me haiku/senryu and all these short form poems require not only acute observation and brevity but an uncomplicated philosophy that all can relate to. That’s quite a tall order, and something quite hard to master?
Hi Ingrid,
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It’s amazing how this short little parcel of poetry can seem more complex than a sonnet! 🙂
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Thankfully Kathy is helping us all look at haiku and its sister genre of senryu in a calm and relaxed manner.
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Ingrid, you said:
“It seems to me haiku/senryu and all these short form poems require not only acute observation and brevity but an uncomplicated philosophy that all can relate to.”
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Wow, seriously, that’s a very astute observation about haiku & senryu (and their related genres)! It’s worth going back to this quote from you whenever we attempt to complicate things beyond necessary.
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You also said:
” That’s quite a tall order, and something quite hard to master?”
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I’d never worry about ‘mastering’ these two genres, and letting that concern go, I feel they will come to us, and on equal terms. In fact my wife Karen has designed something called “The Spectrum of Haiku & Senryu” which I feel will bring out some extraordinary examples at a later date.
Thanks,for these thoughts. I look forward to reading the “Spectrum!”
Hi Mary Ellen Gambutti! 🙂
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We do get some amazing course participants, and both stories, and poems, that are fascinating and moving, and we get to see behind the verses that will eventually find their way into magazines.
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It’s an exceptional privilege, and I think the dynamics around haiku and senryu are getting more and more interesting.
thank you Ingrid, & again (again!) Alan for these kind words… I consider myself a student of haiku… always reading, always learning – trying to be open to the present moment & my senses – I am so grateful to be on this journey with all of you!
HI Kathy!
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“I consider myself a student of haiku… always reading, always learning – trying to be open to the present moment & my senses”
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Yes, I think it’s a combination of being wide open as a student, just as a child from its first years soaks up everything in their amazing learning process, and excited about what people bring to haiku (and senryu) and how we can all learn from each other, and from newcomers as well as those who have been practicing for a long time.
thanks for this, AJ!
a truly inspiring collection of mountain-related haiku.
Thank you, Kathy, and (of course) Alan for your always interesting insights 🙂
Yes, big thanks to Kathy, and as usual, I cannot wait for next week’s response to her prompt!
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I think my ‘lines within lines’ will add extra insight into each wonderful haiku, and that’s there is always more than meets the eye, in a good way! 🙂
thanks Alan!
thanks for this Polona!
I love Wednesdays. What a splendid selection of haiku! Thank you for choosing one of mine, Kathy. Alan, I enjoyed your lines within lines. In fact, this one suddenly jumped out at me: a winding road follows nature’s path” by Bona M. Santos. By the way, I love Kilimanjaro. It’s my favourite mountain. There are so many poems to love but here are my favourites:
clouds of smoke
across the river
a mountain village
Hifsa Ashraf
Pakistan
moon over the peak –
that curvy road
leading home
Giovanna Restuccia
Italy
glaciers
on the mountain
that look you gave me
Deborah P Kolodji
Temple City, California
stepping over
a small piece of sky
mountain violet
Andy McLellan
mountain top
I look down
at my fears
Blessed Ayeyame
Ughelli, Nigeria
dust storm
where the mountain
used to be
Rehn Kovacic
mountain cabin
close enough to the stars
for wishes to reach
Pris Campbell
purple mountain
a dab of sunset
left over
Martha Magenta
England, UK
the memories
that carry us
mountain stream
Joan Prefontaine
Thank you for including me Corine!!!
Thanks Corine, I enjoyed pulling “your lines within lines” out from everyone’s haiku that appears on this page. It provided some wonderful results!
thanks so much for sharing this, Corine!
Thanks, kj, for publishing one of mine. Wonderful collection this week. Congrats to all the poets!
thanks for this Bob!
Pleased to be sharing space with all you fine people once again. Thank you kj!
This one really struck me:
all day climbing…
from summer to
spring
Tsanka Shishkova
An experience you could only have in the mountains. Deftly delivered.
Have a great week all.
Craig and All, Tsanka Shishkova’s poem really struck me, too. Mount Washington in New Hampshire is that kind of mountain – you can start your ascent on a warm summer day and get to the top to find howling winds and signs of early winter!
thanks to both Craig & Pat for sharing your thoughts
“all day climbing” certainly delivers on one of those preterpentadic senses – the sense of time.
Thank you for choosing my haiku Katherine, a beautiful selection
congratulations to everyone
I loved this one, Angela, it could have been written yesterday or 4 billion years ago.
thanks for submitting, Angela, & for your kind words, & also to Mark
I am glad we are in the mountains, where I live. I am very grateful to be selected for your comments on my haiku this week Kathy. Thank you again. This one has special meaning for me. And thank you Alan for choosing a line for your “lines within lines” comments. Congratulations to all the poets here. I love Will Nixon’s haiku as we live in the same mountains.
Thank you Sari!
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There was so much in your haiku, that I’ve enjoyed revisiting it again and again:
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graveside birthday
I watch the balloons
soar to the mountaintop
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Sari Grandstaff
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Despite the sadness, I can see that the balloons, whether celebration balloons, or the big peopled ones, made you also soar to the top of the mountain. Incredible work, and joyous despite the poignancy involved.
my pleasure, Sari, & thanks for sharing this
Thank you Kate for inserting my haiku, interesting to Alan’s comments on our lines. Good to all authors.
Thanks Angiola, and I loved your come and go shadows, highly atmospheric!
thanks for submitting, Angiola!
Dear Cathy,
Greetings! happy and blessed to be one among the selected here. Thank you for accommodating me here. Appreciate your patience and perseverance in meticulously publishing
this blog.
A great source of encouragement.
with regards
S. Radhamani
thank you so much for your kind words!
Thanks, Kathy, for including one of mine, and Alan, for highlighting a line.
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My favourite this week:
—
mountain after mountain
into the distance
diminishing blues
Ingrid Baluchi
Thanks Lisa! There has been again some incredibly strong haiku. I’ll try to find time to comment.
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In the meantime, this blew me away:
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stepping over
a small piece of sky
mountain violet
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Andy McLellan
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thanks so much Lisa & Alan for sharing this!
A fabulous collection of verses, the variety is outstanding and a delight to read, thank you.
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Many thanks for including one of mine, Kathy. Its a view I see regularly, what a bit of encouragement will do to put it into words 🙂 so pleased you chose this one.
thanks again for submitting, carol!
Thank you for your interpretation Alan
Also thank you for choosing my haiku what a great read.
Kathy picked a good ‘un from you, didn’t she! 🙂
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It was a pleasure and honour to pick out yet one more magical part of your poem!
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Alan
Thank you so much for the
hidden gem commentary!!
Many thanks Alan. I’s a view I never tire seeing 🙂
re:
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dawn lit mountain…
patchwork greens
flecked with sheep
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carol jones
Wales
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I love the use of ‘flecked’!
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I used this once for this one:
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crow-flecked
the jack of all moons
rising rising
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Alan Summers
Scope Vol 62 No 1, February 2016
(The magazine of the Fellowship of Australian Writers (Qld) Inc)
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Your haiku is absolutely stunning by the way, and accurately conjures up Wales (and other aspects of British countryside).
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Carol said:
“It’s a view I never tire seeing”
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You should definitely keep writing and storing notes about the view the different aspects of each season onwards. Just rough notes, and once you’ve got enough, a page or two, or more, you will have plenty to create fully-fledged haiku that capture a year of the view you never tire watching.
thanks Margo, Alan & Carol for these encouraging words
Many thanks Alan.
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Your verse is absolutely brilliant. You take this genre to a higher level, no doubt of that, and always a pleasure to read. I certainly will keep taking notes 🙂
Thanks Carol,
That’s very kind! I just get excited at how we all push the genre, and engage with it. Can’t wait to read what you’ll deliver next week! 🙂
I love the mountains. My ancestors came from the mountains, and I have always felt at home living in the shadow of the Cascade and Olympic ranges. When it’s summer and others run to the beach I go to the mountains where the air is thin.
I love these haiku–each one it’s own ascent to a new moment, idea, or image.
Amen to Vishnu Kapoor: “who says I cannot walk over clouds”.
thanks so much for sharing, Amy!
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The extra gift of “found lines, wonderous lines”
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Sometimes there are “lines within lines” of a haiku that sparkle and shine in their own right, an extra gift for us to enjoy, alongside the ‘full haiku’.
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I hope this feature I’ve created makes you look again at each haiku, and read them differently, from another angle. It’s certainly made me appreciate every single one all over again! 🙂
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“I look down at my fears” by Blessed Ayeyame
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“the dipper hangs above” by Margaret Walker
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“balloons soar to the mountaintop” by Sari Grandstaff
.
“foothills unravel before me” by Tia Haynes
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“the great mountain majestic pose” by AJ. Anwar
.
“snake…a train through the mountains” by Adjei Agyei-Baah
.
“size is distance” by Adrian Bouter
.
“an unbroken view of pinks and blues” by Amy Baranski
.
“a 360 degree view of mist” by Andrew Shimield
.
“stepping over a small piece of sky” by Andy McLellan
.
“the first star behind the mountains” by Angela Giordano
.
“come and go shadows” by Angiola Inglese
.
“the rounded arch of a rainbow”
by Anna Maria Domburg –Sancristoforo
.
“a lost field note” and “sawtooth sketches” by Anthony Rabang
.
“a silhouette wreathed in fire” by Ardelle Hollis Ray
.
“the way you left me” by arvinder kaur
.
“wildflowers line up along the road” by Barbara Kaufmann
.
“the old dog and I walk the ridge-top trail” by Barbara Tate
.
“along mountain trails my journey halts” by Basantkumar Das
.
“where the heavens touch the peaks” by Bob Whitmire
.
“a winding road follows nature’s path” by Bona M. Santos
.
“Olympus Mons by lens” by C.R. Harper
.
“patchwork greens flecked with sheep” by carol jones
.
“sleeping bags inside a dome of stars” by Carol Raisfeld
.
“at its foot petals on the wind” by cezar ciobika
.
“the inside Disneyland ride” by Charles Harmon
.
“bride waves from the horse buggy” by Christina Chin
.
“the bleakness of the sky search and rescue” by Christina Sng
.
“my mountain and the next and the…” by Christine Eales
.
“the mountains I wish to see” by Claire Vogel Camargo
.
“warm summer above the tree-line” by Corine Timmer
.
“down on the backs of circling vultures” by Craig Kittner
.
“waiting to exhale Fuji” by dl mattila
.
“Beneath the forest of thistles” and “a mountain chain of molehills”
by David Gale
.
“the phone user gestures to infinity” by David Jacobs
.
And perhaps an allusion to Issa!
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the turnip puller
points the way to the road
with a turnip
.
Issa (translation by R H Blyth)
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“our one time passing only clouds” by David Oates
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“the mountain a pool of pebbles” by Debbi Antebi
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“the black holes between” by Debbie Strange
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“the mountain that look you gave me” by Deborah P Kolodji
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“glaciers creeping myrtle” by Devin Harrison
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“up the mountainside a lone elk stands” by dianne moritz
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“the almond blossom snow glitters” by Dubravka Šcukanec
.
“the stars frame even the mountains” by Eufemia Griffo
.
“clusters of alabaster clouds” by Giedra Kregzdys
.
“that curvy road leading home” by Giovanna Restuccia
.
“Mauna Kea a pueo soars” by Greer Woodward
.
“blood washed mist” by Guliz Mutlu
.
“the river a mountain village” by Hifsa Ashraf
.
“into the distance diminishing blues” by Ingrid Baluchi
.
“the city folded into glimpses” by Isabel Caves
.
“carry us mountain stream” by Joan Prefontaine
.
“right next to my shoe this tiny flower” by Joanne van Helvoort
.
“into darkness I turn off the news” by John S Green
.
“the mountain pass a curtain of stars” by John Hawkhead
.
“a condor flying the snowy peaks” by Julia Guzmán
.
“cloud cover I learn patience” by Kath Abela Wilson
.
“mist covers mountain challenge” by Kathleen Mazurowski
.
“mom’s ashes…alpenglow” by Kimberly Esser
.
“body prints…on the beginner slope” by Lamart Cooper
.
“even in darkness, twilight” by Laurie Greer
.
“recognizing my house on the horizon” by Leonardo Lazzari
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This made me also read:
“recognizing my house the horizon” which added a second layer of magic!
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“the smiling faces when they’re halfway” by Lisa Cherrett
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“shadows the mountains” by Lori Zajkowski
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“Delphi looking for signs” by Lorraine Schein
.
“yet flowers bloom everywhere” by Lucia Cardillo
.
“old hut emptiness” by Lucy Whitehead
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“mountain its all pervading” by Madhuri Pillai
.
“my mountain the border of light” by Margherita Petriccione
.
“the raven spots” by Margo Williams
.
I can read this as intended where ‘spots’ is a verb, it notices or sees, or observes. But the magical part of it also makes me see spots in front of my eyes, as a raven starts to appear or disappear into a column of smoke.
.
“mauve shadows cross a hillside” by Marietta McGregor
.
“pikes peak stream fool’s gold” by Marilyn Appl Walker
.
Wonderful tongue twisting rhythm! 🙂
.
.
“mountains the deep hues of heathers” by Marina Bellini
or even:
.
“mountains the deep hues of heather” which reminds me of my visits to certain areas of Scotland.
.
“a cloud dawdles” by Mark Gilbert
.
“fingertips her breast’s scar”
A wonderfully moving and mystical found line in the haiku by Marta Chocilowska
.
“a dab of sunset left over” by Martha Magenta
.
“always night’s artificial light” by michael ceraolo
.
“shadows undulate from the artist’s palette” by Michael Henry Lee
.
“old pine trees make way for cell towers” by Michael H. Lester
.
“from the clouds into the valley” by Michael Smeer
.
“the windmill’s blade burnishing” by Mike Gallagher
.
“silhouette of a mountain goat” by Mohammad Azim Khan
.
“late summer wedding…veiled in clouds and snow” by Nancy Brady
.
“the calendar cover…next lifetime” by Natalia Kuznetsova
.
“a crack in the rock edelweiss” by Olivier Schopfer
.
“litter bag still empty” by Pat Davis
.
“our mouths agape on the bullet train” by Pauline O’Carolan.
.
Shinkansen, ah shinkansen!
.
“one red feather drifts down mountain fog” by Peggy Bilbro
.
“a few faded blue islands moored to the valley” by Philip Whitley
.
“vanishing point of an eagle’s flight”
and
“an eagle’s flight alpenglow”
by Polona Oblak
.
“close enough to the stars for wishes” by Pris Campbell
.
“the length of this blister” by Rachel Sutcliffe
.
“shivering mantra on my lips” by Radhamani Sarma
.
Wonderful line!
.
“all the colors still not named by Pantone” by Radostina Dragostinova
.
“only memories through the mountain’s fog” by Ramlawt Dinpuia
.
“into the fog out of the fog” by Randy Brooks
.
“where the mountain used to be” by Rehn Kovacic
.
“a rainbow stretching its wings” by Réka Nyitrai
.
“a cougar enters the viewfinder” by Roberta Beary
.
“creeping fog obscures” by robyn brooks
.
“looking right out of myself” by Ron C. Moss
.
“the ridge trail creases peak to peak” by ron scully
.
“the Black Hills light up” by Ronald K. Craig
.
“the blue colour of a little lake” by Rosa Maria Di Salvatore
.
“the top of the mountain looks out of the mist” by Serhiy Shpychenko
.
“to the mountains bats” by shandon land
.
“hasaki and hamon” Japanese swordsmithing!
by simonj
.
“eagle’s nest the way the mountain slopes”
by Skaidrite Stelzer
.
“a look down at the sun” by Slobodan Pupovac
.
“older now the mountain” by Stephen A. Peters
.
“mountain chapel wiping off the dust” by Susan Rogers
.
Incredibly moving.
.
“sliding off the mountain’s face” by Terri French
.
“climbing from summer to spring” by Tsanka Shishkova
.
“peaks form the letter M” by Valentina Ranaldi-Adams
.
“the mountain and our smile” by Vandana Parashar
.
“fire-breathing mountain” by Victor Ortiz
.
“who says I cannot walk over clouds” by Vishnu Kapoor
.
“the fire tower to look for my home” by Will Nixon
.
“lava trail selfies” by Willie Bongcaron
.
.
By focusing, or rather “re-focusing” on the lines, but in a different way, I re-discover the magic, and more magic, in all of the haiku, thank you!
.
.
Here’s one by my wife:
.
kilimanjaro –
looking for the peak
and then looking higher
.
Karen Hoy
From: This Lion Country sequence (Serengeti)
Published in Presence (issue 57 2017)
.
“and then looking higher” by Karen Hoy
.
.
Thank for your splendind gift, Alan! Your idea of “lines within lines and comments made me speechless!
Thanks Marta!
.
It was a real eye opener for me, I might make this is a feature in my book. I don’t think we often see that ‘extra magic’ sometimes.
.
Alan
.
p.s.
The line within a line of your haiku was amazing because ‘fingertips’ isn’t just a verb, it’s where the scar and breast and fingertips become one for a moment. Did you know just how special your haiku was?
I know that already… thank you Alan for opening my eyes !
m.
Can we have two line haiku then?
twin peak
fingertips her breast’s scar
Well, two line haiku are regularly done. 🙂
.
Yanty’s Butterfly has a two line section, and money goes to charity and to Yanty’s family:
https://jsalzer.wixsite.com/yantysbutterfly
.
Available on Kindle, and worth every cent.
.
re:
twin peak
fingertips her breast’s scar
.
.
perhaps:
.
.
twin peaks
fingertips her breast’s scar or scars has strong possibilities!
Fabulous, Alan. I think you have found a jewel in each haiku, here, this list is something to be kept for reference.
*
Karen’s haiku is a fitting finale to the list, it has that ‘we can archive great things but we can do even better if we believe in ourselves’
*
Kind regards
carol
Thanks Carol!
.
Would you believe it, but Karen’s dad, when stationed over there, popped up Kilimanjaro with just his day uniform and ‘poke boots’. You might be too young, those boots are the old style British Army footwear, awful things. 🙂
.
Alan
That is an amazing thing to have done, Alan, I can only assume he is a man that knew exactly what he was doing, not the kind of place to go for a casual stroll. I’ll do a search for the mentioned boots, I think I’m going to be even more shocked.
My first reaction when reading your story ‘WHAT’
Thanks for sharing,
Hi Carol,
They were just standard army boots (hadn’t changed since WWII), awful things for the British to have unlike the wonderful American boots! As I had them in cadets I know how bad they were!
Poke boots aka British Army standard footwear for infantry:
http://www.sofmilitary.co.uk/british-army-black-ww2-ammo-boots-by-kay-canvas-product,11473
It’s fun playing with words like this. excellent! thanks, Alan.
thanks Kathy for this wonderful collection of haiku!
blessings!
Hifsa
Thanks! Of course there was a serious side to the exercise too. 🙂
.
Did you see that not only do you have a wonderful pivot line in ‘across the river’…
.
.
clouds of smoke
across the river
a mountain village
.
Hifsa Ashraf
Pakistan
.
.
But that section I lifted out…
.
.
“the river a mountain village”
.
.
… has a magic all of its own.
Dear esteemed poet,
Greetings, delighted to through –the great pleasure and gift of yours
“lines within lines -wondrous lines”. Again a chance to go through all haiku and from your
good self a flow of encouragement . I am thrice blessed and happy to be one among of the selected.
with regards
S.Radhamani
Thank you S.Radhamani, a wonderful person as well as writer.
.
.
snowy peak
shivering mantra
on my lips
.
Radhamani Sarma
Chennai, India
.
.
Wonderful poem, and a delight to highlight those lines.
Fantastic exercise you have introduced!
Thank you for the always fresh perspective—enlightening.
.
pooping
outside the box
my free thinking cat
.
Alan, I know you have a healthy sense of humor . . . ha!
Schrödinger’s cat walked into a bar and asked for something, but we’ll never know what. 😉
.
Ah, did Gary tell you? 🙂
.
Alan
Gary?
Schrödinger?
Gary Evans from your haiku group? 🙂
And the cat in the box, not the lady from 2A. 🙂
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZgRViUJ3J4E
Thanks for the insight to Schrödinger’s cat—funny clip.
I figured it out on my own . . . your humor.
Choosing and pulling lines within lines, great idea, Alan. I could see you arranging and ‘re-arranging all of these single lines into a longer format poem. It could be awesome. Nancy Brady
That is a fascinating idea, and I can see that if individual poets pulled lines from their own collection of haiku and senryu they could create a “Found poem”, almost doing Found poetry in reverse! 🙂
fascinating… thanks so much, as always, Alan, & to all the others for these great comments!
So inspiring!
Thank you so much–what enjoyment reading about mountains the world over!! …and I learned something from Michael Smeer–there are no real mountains in the Netherlands.
thanks for this Barbara!
A lovely selection!
It’s a pleasure reading these marvelous haiku.
thanks Giovanna!
Thank you for selecting my ku among so many great ones, Katherine.
thanks for submitting, Michael!
Thanks for including mine – inspired by Mount Hood in the US Cascade Range (not Coast Range as I said in my submission)
thanks for this Mark!
W
onderful poems!Thanks for publishing one of mine. Congratulations to all
thanks for this Margherita!
What wonderful vistas viewed in this collection, Kathy. Mountain ranges from nearly continent from so many perspectives of travel and experience. Thanks for including one of mine.
thanks for submitting Nancy!
A lovely selection from everywhere and a great way to travel from my armchair – up, down, by, through and in and out of all these mountains.
Thank you kj for selecting one of mine.
thanks for this Ingrid!
Kathy, thank-you for publishing one of mine. Congratulations to all the other poets !!
thanks for submitting, Valentina!
Thank you again for including me.
A dipper is also a little bird that feeds in mountain streams. They sometimes even brood behind waterfalls. Facinating little birds!
thanks for this Joanne!
Thank you kjmunro for including my haiku as well as the comment. A wonderful collections it is and I am excited to be part of it!
thanks for your kind words!